Lost and Found
by darstar
Summary: The aftermath of the events in Iraq leaves the team reeling. A familiar face shows up as Tony struggles to come to terms with the changes forced upon him. THIS IS AND WILL ALWAYS BE A TIVA STORY! SPOILER WARNINGS for the finale and season 13 premiere. You have been warned.
1. Chapter 1

_**This story is about events that have already aired and interviews regarding these episodes and where the Season Thirteen premiere will start from. If you have not seen these episodes or somehow have not seen any reference to the finale on the internet, leave now. Stay at your own risk. I will not be responsible for ruining the experience for you, you have been forewarned. Also, this is a TIVA story. Don't like, don't read.**_

 _ **The events of the Season Twelve finale provide for a plausible excuse for Ziva to show up. Cote has made it clear in her recent interviews that she was willing, so if she does not show up in the premiere it will be because she wasn't asked. Unfortunately, I feel this will probably be the case.**_

 _ **This is my take on how I could see Cote and Ziva returning. I do not own any of the characters or NCIS.**_

 _ **My other story, "In My Life" is on hold for the moment as I truly can't think of anything to write after the way these characters have been so screwed up lately.**_

 **Previously on NCIS** : "Agent Gibbs?" Gibbs turned slowly around, the hot sun bearing down creating mirages. _"Was that really Luke?"_ He saw the gun in the child's hand too late, fumbling at his own attempt to draw his weapon; as if he knew he would never use it against the brainwashed boy.

The first shot hit him in the left knee. Gibbs didn't know which hurt worse, the pain of the close range projectile shattering his patella or the shock of Luke actually pulling the trigger. He fell immediately to his knees, but struggled to an upright position. He stared at Luke, pleading at him with his eyes to not do this, to come to his senses, to….

The force of the second shot threw Gibbs backward. The world whirled around the Agent: the spray of blood as the bullet entered his chest; the searing pain followed almost immediately by a numbing inability to breathe, sand particles hanging in suspension in the sun rays about him.

As he gasped for air, he was vaguely aware of Luke quickly walking past him, his eyes averted in denial of his actions.

" **Lost and Found"**

"After all they are only children…" Tony was searching the high windows for the elusive Daniel Budd. Tony was becoming increasingly uncomfortable by this chatty fellow and started to search the market place for Gibbs. _This felt wrong_ …

As the erupting gunfire caught Tony unawares, he reacted with shock and anger that he had purposely been distracted and he had fallen for it. Tony's eyes widened in horror as he watched Gibbs gunned down by the child they had come to rescue; the child they had been so sure had been taken against his will into the fold called "The Calling".

"Gibbs!" Tony yelled at the fallen agent, his hands pressing down hard on the wound to stem the blood flow. His head whipped around and he caught site of Joanna Teague, who was frantically making her way through the shrieking and cowering crowd. Her phone was pressed to her ear, her mouth barking urgent orders to…someone.

 **NCIS Headquarters, Washington DC- four days later**

Director Leon Vance stared hard at Tony DiNozzo. Tony was pacing the office, alternating between feeling guilt for not protecting Gibbs and wanting to get back out there and seek revenge for his fallen team mate. His anger was justified but Vance was concerned. How many more people needed to die before this team understood that emotions had no place in the planning and execution of operations?

"I understand where you are coming from Agent DiNozzo, but the team has taken a hit, suffering two losses in less than four weeks. Internal Affairs is breathing down my neck and they will be investigating; not just this incident but the planning and execution of the op as well."

Vance looked grim. "The last thing NCIS needs right now is a reputation for hot-headed Agents not following protocol and allowing their emotions to dictate their actions." He took in a deep breath, reminded of the events of two years ago when his own emotions forced him to sanction a worldwide search for his wife's killer. He nodded at Tony, acknowledging the knowing look he was giving him.

"Understood, Agent DiNozzo. And we went through hell with that episode. I must do everything in my power to keep this Agency afloat and if that means we need to step back for a while, that's what we are going to do." Vance shifted in his chair, considering his next words.

"I want you to go home and recharge, DiNozzo. You'll get your chance to go after this bastard but right now you and everyone else on the team need to be recused from this investigation." He cast an appraising eye over the agent, noting the dark circles under his eyes, the wild hair and unshaven face.

Tony's clenched his jaw, his mouth tight. "You're benching me?" His tone was incredulous.

"I am telling you to go home and take a few days. Get some sleep, eat some decent food. I need you to be at the top of your game when the time comes for us to act." Tony pursed his lips, thinking about what the Director was saying, and what he wasn't saying.

One the one hand, they weren't going to let Budd get away with what he did. But on the other hand, Tony knew that the longer they waited the colder the trail would get. The Agent in him was of a mind to start right this minute but he knew Vance would _really_ bench him if he bucked his authority.

Tony opened his mouth to argue the point but Vance held up his hand. "Go home, DiNozzo. Don't have me make it an order." The threat had been verbalized and heard, the meaning clear. _"Go home or I_ _will_ _bench you!"_

Tony turned on his heel and stormed from the office. McGee and Bishop looked up at the pounding of his feet on the stairs the anger was coming off of him in waves. Tony felt impotent and useless and without a word to the others, he grabbed his bag. McGee looked at Bishop in alarm.

"Tony, it wasn't your fault! I'm sure Vance doesn't blame you…"

"Save it, McGee." Tony cut in tersely, his long stride already halfway to the elevator.

"Tony!" McGee called out to him and started after him, but Bishop put her hand on his arm, stopping his headway.

They both looked up as Vance came down the stairs. Gulping, they turned together to hear what the Director had to say to them, about Gibbs, about Tony; about the _team_.

 **NW Washington DC**

Tony sat for a few moments in his car. He was so angry he wanted to scream, but he knew it would serve no useful purpose. And Vance bringing up Eli, Jackie and Bodnar had sent him into a tailspin. Just another reminder of how he had screwed up, he thought to himself bitterly, thinking of Ziva and how he had failed to bring her home with him.

He had accepted her explanation but he hadn't understood it, not really. How could she think so badly of herself? Tony was at a loss as he had tried to convince her that her perception of herself was skewed and that others, _especially Tony_ , saw her in a completely different light. But it was all to no avail. There wasn't anything Tony could do to change her mind, once it was made up.

Tony let his head drop to that back of the seat, closing his eyes to will away his thoughts. Grabbing his things he finally got out of his car and crossed the street to his apartment.

The figure watched him look both ways, stepping back slightly into the shadows to avoid detection. As Tony took the steps two at a time and entered the apartment building, the dark clad figure made their way in the same direction, following the Agent's footsteps.

Tony threw his jacket onto the sofa and marched into the kitchen. He grabbed the first bottle within his reach and poured himself a healthy slug of the amber liquid. He took a large gulp, grimacing as the fluid burned its way down his esophagus. As he prepared to refill his tumbler, there came a tentative knock on his door. Tony's head turned in the direction of the offensive noise, frowning at the unwelcome interruption.

"Go home. McGee. I'm _fine_!" Tony snarled, thinking it was just like the younger Agent to feel it was his duty to look after Tony and try to make him feel better. Like _that_ was ever going to happen…

The second knock made Tony slam his glass down on the island counter top. As he strode to the front door, he made his feelings loud and clear. "Dammit McGee, I told you I was fine!" Tony said the last words as he flung the door to his apartment open.

He stared dumbfounded at his uninvited guest, totally shocked and momentarily rendered speechless. He opened his mouth as he stared at the brown eyes regarding him with such sorrow and worry, her curly hair shorter than he remembered but everything else about her as vivid as if they had just seen each other that morning, and not seventeen months ago.

Ziva David took a step forward, watching Tony closely as she closed the gap between them. "I'm fine." Tony choked out, his voice barely a whisper, the slight tremor betraying the uncertainty of his feelings.

Ziva stood directly in front of him and, with a slight hesitation, cupped his cheek with her right hand and placed her left hand on his arm. Tony looked at her, feeling her touch and was suddenly tired. He put his head down and leaned forward so that their foreheads touched.

"I'm fine…" He couldn't finish; his voice cracking as he held back the catch in his voice, his emotions finally betraying him. He felt Ziva put her arms around him and listened as she spoke softly to him, speaking a language only the two of them could understand.

 _ **Well, what do you think? Is it worth continuing? I don't like writing to the wind, so let me know your thoughts. Does Gibbs die? I frankly find it hard to believe that he will be killed off on the show, but stranger things have happened. The only things that have come out in interviews is that the premiere will take off where things were left from the last moments of the finale and that because Tony was on the phone with Budd he would be taking lead on finding him. Enjoy.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**First, let me just say that I am overwhelmed by the response to this little story. Your lovely comments made my day. Your thoughts on how the story may proceed are interesting and some of you may or may not be correct in your assessment. Regardless, I hope you will continue to read what I write.**

 **I do have the story marked as TIVA and Tony and Ziva are the only characters listed although obviously the others make an appearance. Therefore, I am somewhat perplexed that someone would read the story and complain that Ziva was in it, or that she had returned. Please do not use my stories as a platform to display your anti-Cote/Ziva/TIVA opinions. Thank you.**

 **Usual disclaimers.**

 _ **Ziva stood directly in front of him and, with a slight hesitation, cupped his cheek with her right hand and placed her left hand on his arm. Tony looked at her, feeling her touch and was suddenly tired. He put his head down and leaned forward so that their foreheads touched.**_

" _ **I'm fine…" He couldn't finish; his voice cracking as he held back the catch in his voice, his emotions finally betraying him. He felt Ziva put her arms around him and listened as she spoke softly to him, speaking a language only the two of them could understand**_

" **Lost and Found"- Chapter Two**

The hospital lights were harsh and glaring, and if ones' eyes were open, vision would most definitely be impaired. However, the eyes of Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs were not open. He was not bothered by the noises surrounding him, the bustle of the intensive care unit where his injured body lay. No, he was bothered by his seemingly constant companion, and frankly (no pun intended), Gibbs was getting a bit weary of the sage advice constantly being thrown his way.

"What did I tell you, Probie?" Mike Franks pointed at the still form in the hospital bed. "You were seeing what you wanted to see, not how it was. I told you this was going to happen. Now what are you going to do? How are you going to get out of this one?"

 **Tony's apartment**

The living room was darkened, only dimly lit from the wall sconces and the ambient light from the street below. The world was quiet: no laughing and shouting, no screams, no sirens…DC was having a rare night of relative calm.

"Thank you." Ziva accepted the glass of wine Tony handed her, looking into its contents as if it were a crystal ball, hoping to divine the future. Tony sucked in his breath as a passing light bounced off of his window, causing small rays of sparkles to filter through the wine and illuminate Ziva's face. It gave her an unworldly glow, beautiful and unreal. Tony wondered, not for the first time, if his mind was playing tricks on him and she was not really here, in Washington, in his apartment, _with him_.

Ziva settled back on the leather sofa, her feet tucked underneath her as she always did. Tony took the safe route and sat at the other end and faced his former partner, still somewhat stunned by her surprise appearance but no longer thinking he had lost his mind. He peered at her through guarded eyes, surprised at his initial response to her touch. He hadn't expected to see her and he sure as hell hadn't expected to fall into her arms the moment he did. A lot had happened since they had last seen each other, and Tony was acutely aware that he had no idea what Ziva had been doing while she was away, clear across the planet for God's sake.

Tony shook his head slightly to clear his thoughts, a movement not unnoticed by Ziva. She raised an eyebrow in question, but Tony just flashed his fake DiNozzo grin. Ziva sighed, understanding the signs.

Once the decision had been made to come back, she only gave a moment's thought to Tony's reaction at seeing her again, and it had not necessarily been a positive one. A long time had passed since they had seen each other and Ziva knew quite well that Tony did not play well alone. She came because of the news she had received about Gibbs, but she would be lying to herself if Tony had not really been first most in her thoughts.

"Why are you here, Ziva?" Tony's voice broke the silence that was starting to get a bit uncomfortable for both of them. Not that the question made the sudden awkwardness any more pleasurable for either of them…

Tony realized how his question sounded and quickly amended it. "I mean, I _know_ why you are here. You're here for Gibbs. I guess what I meant was how did you find out about what happened?" He hoped that it sounded less accusatory than his original version. The slight release of tension in Ziva's shoulders told him that his first assumption had been correct and he berated himself for not thinking before opening his big fat mouth.

Ziva shifted a bit, getting into a more comfortable position. "Before you ask, or assume…I am not working for Mossad; or anyone in law enforcement or intelligence for that matter. I told you I needed to let go of the badge. I was honest with you about that and it is what I have done."

Tony nodded his acceptance, somewhat surprised that he was pleased to hear that she had indeed left the work behind. He had some thoughts that she had actually been working covertly all this time; working for someone that she was not allowed to tell him about. He felt slightly sick to his stomach to think that what she had said to him in Israel all those months ago had been a ruse to hide her actual mission and to make him leave.

He bit back the smile that was forming, and instead decided he needed to respond in a somewhat more positive light. "I believe you, Ziva. You were quite adamant in your decision to leave us all behind. But you can understand my confusion in how you found out about Gibbs." Tony didn't miss the slight narrowing of Ziva's eyes and the flash of hurt that disappeared as quickly as it came. He wracked his brain to think what it was he said that may have bothered her, not realizing how his comment of Ziva "leaving them all behind" could be construed.

Ziva decided to ignore the unintentional jibe and continued her narrative. "I also do not know what you were doing in Iraq, I mean, what your mission was…or is." She paused as she collected her thoughts. She looked at her former partner, noting that he had relaxed his stance somewhat as well. She wondered if he had thought that she had continued to work with Mossad all this time. She did not think it possible that Tony would consider such a thing, but his body language had changed after she had stated she was not still in the "business".

"I also do not know exactly who you were working with, but I do know that some other agency was involved. Gibbs is very well known in the intelligence community, not just here in the United States but all over the world. News of…what happened…spread very quickly." Ziva took a sip of her wine, her voice cracking. She quickly composed herself, but she did not miss the softening of Tony's features at her reaction.

"Director Elbaz informed me that Gibbs had been shot and that you were taking him home. She knew how close I was to Gibbs and…and thought I should know. I caught the first flight available." Ziva downed the remainder of her wine in one swallow and placed the empty glass on the coffee table. Tony raised his eyebrows, but she shook her head "no" to the offer of a refill.

Ziva unfolded her legs and stood, vaguely looking around the apartment. She noticed that Tony now had two goldfish, but didn't comment. She saw the dusty go-bag thrown haphazardly in a corner of the living room and understood that Tony had not even taken the time to unpack. There were quite a few new DVD's in the collection as well as some sheet music on the piano. Ziva hoped it was a happy song and that Tony had not been spending his free moments on melancholy tunes and minor chords.

Tony looked up and watched Ziva as she glanced around and took in her surroundings. He smiled at her arched eyebrow over his second goldfish. _She still had it_ , he thought to himself. He wondered briefly if there were any remnants of Zoe in his apartment. That had ended a while ago, and she never really spent a lot of time here. In fact, when he found out she had made a key to his apartment without his knowledge, _or consent_ …courtesy of his Dad's glee over the whole affair…that was the proverbial nail in the coffin.

He had liked Zoe and enjoyed being with her, usually. But he did find her to be somewhat controlling. It was clear that she intended to wear the pants in the family and he didn't appreciate or agree with the sentiment. Tony was never one who liked to be told what to do, and Zoe was constantly doing that. And as far as that's concerned, the whole thing started to begin with because Tony was being told what to do…by Abby.

Tony had asked Zoe out in order to get Abby off of his back. He hadn't been pleased with the way she had cornered him and _demanded_ that he let go of Ziva. But Tony was ever the peace maker and decided it was easier to keep Abby happy than try to find happiness for himself. Not that being with Zoe had made him _unhappy_ necessarily, but Tony understood deep down that it was a façade, and trying to replace one person with another was a _really, really bad idea_.

Tony sighed and looked up; startled at the scrutiny that Ziva was giving him as he had been lost in his thoughts. "I should go." She said softly, starting to move toward the door. Tony jumped up from his seated position and stood uncertainly nearby.

"Go where?" He asked simply. She had just gotten here; she couldn't be leaving again so soon…Tony was surprised at the slight panic he felt that Ziva might walk out his door and never return.

Ziva opened her mouth, but realized she had no answer. She had literally found a flight, got on said flight, flew into DC and came to Tony's apartment. No plans had been made, no thought had been put into what she would do once she arrived, other than she had to see Tony.

"I…I do not know." Ziva admitted reluctantly. "I supposed I can go to Gibbs' house. He is not using it at the moment." They both stared at each other at the truth of the statement. Tony watched her carefully for a few moments, weighing the options.

"I don't think that's a good idea. Why…why don't you stay here?" The words were out before Tony even considered the impact those few words could have. Deciding to take the chance, he took a deep breath.

"Look, you can take the bedroom, and I will stay out here." Tony waved his hand toward the sofa. "I have a few days off and we can figure things out for you…if that's what you want to do." Tony was leaving it open-ended for Ziva and he could see the stress ooze from her body. He realized that she had truly not thought beyond getting to DC. He decided that the matter had been taken care of and headed toward the bedroom to get the linens for the sofa.

"Tony, why are you not working for a few days? Why are you not going after this person who did this to Gibbs?" The question was not asked in anger but in surprise. Tony slowly turned and walked back toward Ziva, his expression a mixture of anger, resignation and sadness.

"Oh Tony, Vance has not seated you has he? How could he do that?" Ziva's voice expressed the same incredulous tone that Tony's had at the same question. In that instant, Tony wanted to hug her so badly. He had missed how their thoughts were so often in sync. And he had _so_ missed her botched English.

Tony shook his head ruefully. "Not permanently, but he wants me to get out of my head, so to speak. Take a step back, collect my wits. _Then_ we'll go after Budd." Ziva eyed him closely, understanding how difficult this moment must have been for him. After a few beats of silence, she nodded. A decision had been made.

"I will stay with you then. To help you collect your missing wits." Tony smiled wide and chuckled, remembering so many other times that Ziva had his back. She smiled back, happy to see that a part of the old Tony was still present. She headed toward the bedroom, but turned slightly before entering.

"Tony, I may have come back _because_ of Gibbs; but I came _home…for you_."

 _ **Ok, so now you know that Gibbs is not dead at the moment. I felt it important to explain the absence of Zoe, since there are many fanfics out there where the moment Ziva shows up Tony just dumps Zoe. I would hope Tony is not such a cad, so I have them already split. I never watched the eps she was in, but I do keep up with social media. Will Ziva ever find out about Zoe? Haven't decided yet. This update was faster than my normal speed. Please don't get used to it as you will only be disappointed. I am trying very hard to stay on a weekly update, but we will see how it goes. Thanks again for your amazing support!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Again, thank you so much for your amazing support of this story. I truly appreciate all of your reviews, follows and faves. Some of the reviews made me realize how few of you have watched the show at all since Cote left and have no idea who some of these characters are. If you are trying to stay spoiler free, leave now. But then, if you are already on this chapter you should know that. A short run-down of people and events:**

 _ **Zoe Keates**_ **\- worked with Tony in Philadelphia PD; Tony worked at Philly four years before NCIS, so it was a LONG time ago as Tony was with NCIS almost two years when the show premiered so you can do the math. She appeared in the Oct 29th episode as an ATF agent. She recognized his voice and called him "Spider". To those who don't know, the nickname comes from the movie "Goodfellas" and is very derogatory and not a term of endearment. I disliked her immediate for that reason alone. It was clear to me that they had no contact whatsoever since he left and went to Baltimore. Abby and McGee recognized the change in Tony by seeing her, commenting that he hadn't looked at anyone like that since…cue to knowing looks between the two which is supposed to be interpreted by the audience to mean Ziva. Bishop just looked confused. Abby then lures Tony down to her lair and demands that he let go of Ziva because "they love him" which I took to mean that Ziva didn't. I also took this scene as a poke by the show to tell the TIVA fans to let it go…cue song from the movie. By the January 13** **th** **episode Tim and Bishop marvel that "Tony is in love" and even Gibbs says "It's about time." No one wants Ziva. sigh Zoe shows up in the bullpen waving his handcuffs that he left at her place.** _ **TMI**_ **. There is a reference to Zoe wanting Tony to meet her parents I think in March, but Tony lies about having to work and on the April 7** **th** **episode Tony is suddenly inviting his Dad to meet her and they work (Tony and Zoe) together on a case which seriously strains the relationship. Zoe lets herself into Tony's apartment with a key and finds Sr. there. He makes some comment about his surprise at Tony giving her a key due to his commitment issues and she gets quite flustered and leaves. The whole episode is Tony wondering if they should be together, but ends with them in a car together saying they want it to work. They do not kiss when Tony gets out of the car and there has been no reference to her since.**

 _ **Luke Harris**_ **\- Luke is a teen that has been recruited by "The Calling", a global terrorist group that is recruiting teens via the Internet. He was born in Iraq and adopted by American parents. Dorneget gets killed in Cairo because of this group.**

 _ **Joanne Teague**_ **\- Joanne is a CIA Officer who shows up because she happens to be Dorneget's mother. Of'course the CIA also has intelligence on this group and she forces her way into the investigation to revenge the death of her "sweet boy". Luke goes missing and she interrogates in what looked to be torture another young man to get his whereabouts. Turns out he is in Iraq and Gibbs, Teague and Tony head there to bring the poor lost boy back to the US. He thanks them by shooting Gibbs…twice.**

 _ **Daniel Budd-**_ **The leader of The Calling. He is in Iraq and can see Gibbs and Tony from a second story window as they walk around the area. He calls Tony on his cell and tells him he has been studying him. Tony of'course engages him in conversation, throwing barbs at him. Personally, I was disturbed by the "studying him" part. This allows Gibbs to be lured into the market place where Luke shows up and shoots him.**

 _ **Mike Franks**_ **\- Gibbs' first NIS boss, who called Gibbs Probie until the day he died when he was stabbed by the Port to Port killer in the Season Eight penultimate episode "Swan Song". He has been since then as a "ghost conscience" of Gibbs in the Season Eight finale "Pyramid", the 200** **th** **Season Nine episode "Life Before his Eyes", the Season Ten finale "Damned if You Do"; Season Eleven's "Anonymous was a Woman" and the Season Twelve finale arc "The Lost Boys" and "Neverland". Muse Watson is confirmed to be appearing in the Season Thirteen premiere.**

 **This synopsis is almost as long as my chapter so I hope you aren't disappointed and think it's too short.**

 _ **Tony shook his head ruefully. "Not permanently, but he wants me to get out of my head, so to speak. Take a step back, collect my wits. Then we'll go after Budd." Ziva eyed him closely, understanding how difficult this moment must have been for him. After a few beats of silence, she nodded. A decision had been made.**_

" _ **I will stay with you then. To help you collect your missing wits." Tony smiled wide and chuckled, remembering so many other times that Ziva had his back. She smiled back, happy to see that a part of the old Tony was still present. She headed toward the bedroom, but turned slightly before entering.**_

" _ **Tony, I may have come back because of Gibbs; but I came home…for you."**_

 **Usual Disclaimers; also brief references to episodes in previous seasons**

" **Lost and Found"** – Chapter Three

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda**

Gibbs walked around the bed, surveying the damage to his body. Mike Franks watched him without comment, for once. But there was a knowing smirk on his face that was all too familiar.

Gibbs looked at the monitors mounted on the wall, although for the life of him he couldn't figure out why in the hell he was bothering since he couldn't understand a damn things those squiggly lines meant. He finally finished his rounds and shrugged, unimpressed.

"I've looked a hell of a lot worse."

"I'll say, Probie. You've been…what? Blown up at least two, three, four times? You were a mess after that ship explosion. Almost didn't recognize your ugly mug." Gibbs gave a small crooked smile at Franks' description of the damage that had been done to Gibbs' face after being blown up by Pin Pin Pula.

"Why am I still here? And why are _you_ still here? Am I going to be stuck with you through all of eternity? No offense, Mike but there are some other people I'd rather be keeping company with." Gibbs demanded.

"None taken." Franks eyed his protégé, the grin absent. But there was a look in his eyes that bothered Gibbs more than he cared to admit.

"Mike, why am I still here? I get it…I let my emotions dictate my actions and now I am paying the price. Lesson learned. You can leave now." Gibbs asked again, his tone plaintive. Franks just shook his head.

"Unfinished business, Probie."

 **Tony's Apartment**

Tony frowned as he considered the ramifications of Gibbs being shot and for the first time he wondered about the future of the team. Up until this point he had been focused on getting Gibbs to safety and medical attention and then to getting the bastard responsible. He hadn't taken any time for self-indulgent reflection, other than blaming himself for Gibbs' current state of injury.

As these disquieting thoughts invaded Tony's mind while he struggled to fall asleep, he was also acutely aware of the person occupying his bed in the next room and considered the ramifications of Ziva's sudden and unexpected appearance.

He turned on his side and sighed, watching Kate and Ziva swim lazily around their bowl. He was positive they were laughing at him, which only added to his agitation. Eight years was not so easily erased, despite the prevailing opinion of some persons who will not be named, that it should be. No, Ziva had been an important and integral part of his life, even if it had mostly been in the work setting. Not totally, he smiled softly to himself, but their association outside of NCIS had amounted to far less time than he would have preferred.

It came to Tony in an instant how much he had missed working with Ziva, to have her to bounce ideas off of, to keep him focused, and to support him as good partners do. Tony ruefully admitted to himself that his heart hadn't been in his work since…well, if he was being honest with himself, since his _heart_ had left. McGee had not so subtly been maneuvering himself into the "Golden Boy" position as Gibbs' right hand man, and Gibbs had allowed it. Bishop was…Bishop. Tony hadn't wanted a replacement agent in the first place, but it was Gibbs' team and Gibbs did what he wanted.

With Gibbs out of the picture, perhaps permanently, a whole new dynamic would be at play here and Tony wasn't quite sure how he wanted it to pan out. Sure, he had always assumed that once Gibbs finally stepped down the team would be his. He had been counting on it for years…no, that wasn't quite true. He had stopped thinking about taking over the team once Ziva had left.

Did he even want the team anymore, and is this how he wanted to "inherit" it? Tony wasn't positive at this point that Vance considered him to be first in line for the job. Tony grabbed his pillow and covered his face in frustration. He needed to sleep and not think about these types of things right now…

Tony woke with a start, squinting at the sun streaming in through the living room windows. He groaned and sat up, rubbing the rough bristles on his face. Tantalizing aromas suddenly assaulted his senses, causing him to momentarily panic and think he was somewhere else. He frowned and stood up, stretching his long body and grimacing at the offensive noises his body made at his actions. Looking around and satisfied that he wasn't losing his mind and was in fact still in his own domicile, he shuffled into his kitchen and stopped short.

Tony stared in amazement at the spread that lay before him on his island. "What is all this?" He was surprised but pleasantly so. Tony was suddenly reminded of Vance's orders that he needed to eat a decent meal, but he knew Ziva wasn't aware of that.

Ziva turned and smiled in amusement. "It is breakfast, Tony. You need to eat something other than…" She opened the fridge and pulled out a week's old container of Chinese take-out. "Other than **_Kung Pao Ming Har._** " She took an experimental sniff, made a horrendous face and chucked the container into the garbage.

"Where did all this food come from?" Tony rarely had enough on hand to make a sandwich, much less a meal. And he knew for certain that his kitchen had been quite bare when he left for Iraq.

Ziva chuckled as she placed the omelet on the platter. "My dear Tony, why do you think they invented grocery store delivery service?" Tony just stared at her, his mouth slightly open.

"You called me _'Dear'"_ , he said, utilizing his best smarmy voice in a fast comeback. Ziva rolled her eyes and pointed to the food. Tony grinned and dutifully picked up his laden plate. Ziva followed him to the dining room table and they ate in companionable silence.

"I have really missed your cooking, Ziva." Tony closed his eyes in epicurean bliss as he swallowed another bite of the delectable meal.

Ziva blushed slightly with pleasure, which did not go unnoticed by Tony. Not wanting to embarrass her or make her feel uncomfortable, he steered the conversation to what he thought would be safer territory.

"So, what is on your agenda today? I can take you anywhere you want, or just take you to the Metro if you want to go about on your own. Or you can stay here and, I don't know; watch a movie, read a book, or play the piano." Tony had noticed Ziva looking longingly at his baby grand the evening before. He had only heard her play once but it had been an exquisite experience. He was suddenly nostalgic, remembering when Ziva had offered to give him piano lessons and was filled with regret that he had never taken her up on her offer.

He looked up to see Ziva regarding him curiously. She took a sip of her tea and cleared her throat. "Tony, I am not here on holiday so you should not feel that you need to…entertain me."

Tony leaned back in his chair. "I know that." He said softly. "And if I was working, it wouldn't be an option. I'm not trying to tell you what to do or where to go, I'm just letting you know that I am available if you need me…uh, you know, to be available."

Ziva considered his offer, and his slight stumble, and thought for a few moments. She looked up and Tony was surprised to see embarrassment on her face. "I told you the truth that I took the first plane I could get. I did not have too much time to make any arrangements." She paused and looked slightly uncomfortable.

"I did not bring much with me; in fact I brought nothing except my satchel." Ziva pointed to the large leather tote that was leaning against the sofa. Tony hadn't even noticed it the night before, his eyes only on her.

"I think I will need to do some shopping, unless you feel like letting me borrow some of your clothes? No, I do not think that would be a very good idea." Ziva waited for the inevitable DiNozzo retort about her walking around naked instead, but it didn't come. Ziva wasn't sure if she was disappointed or relieved. Trying to change the subject, she looked around and again noticed the second goldfish.

"I see you have added to your collection." She nodded toward the bowl on the small side table by his front door. Tony shifted a bit in his chair, suddenly wary.

"Oh, yeah. I see you've met…um…" Ziva looked at Tony expectantly and was surprised to see _him_ looking embarrassed.

Tony took a deep breath. "Her name is Ziva." The quiet in the room was deafening. Ziva tried to follow Tony's logic regarding his pet naming patterns and didn't like the conclusion she was coming up with.

"Tony, I am not dead." She tried to remove the emotion from her voice, but was aware that she was not entirely successful. Tony dropped his chin to his chest, his lips tight with his struggle to not turn this into an argument.

"No, you're not. But you also weren't... _here_. Sometimes I need to talk to you. I don't know; it seemed to make sense at the time." Tony shrugged like it was no big deal but they both knew it was. Tony's attempt at self-deprecation was not lost on Ziva but she was also bothered by his admission.

Truth be told, there were many times _she_ needed to talk to Tony as well, but she never considered getting a pet and naming it after him. She felt it was important to lighten the mood and get rid of the depressing gloom that was threatening to overwhelm them.

"I see. Well then, has she ever talked back to you?" Ziva's eyes were open wide in innocence and Tony recognized the effort she was making to have this something to laugh about instead of cry over. Tony dipped his head and smiled wide, appreciating the gesture.

"Oh, yeah…but I have to keep correcting her English." Tony and Ziva looked at each for a few moments and then burst into laughter. The ploy had worked and the tension evaporated. There may be a time for further exploration into Tony's psyche but it would not be this morning.

Just as quickly, Ziva's smile disappeared. She suddenly stood and cleared her plates from the table, putting them in the sink. She stood there quietly, looking at her reflection in the glass inserts of the cabinet door. She sensed Tony's presence beside her before she saw his face reflecting back at her.

"Ziva?" Tony's voice was full of concern.

Taking a deep breath, she turned toward him and placed her hand in his chest.

"There is one other thing I must do today, before..." Ziva left her fears unspoken. She looked into Tony's eyes, knowing he would understand.

"I need to see Gibbs."

 **NCIS**

Tim looked around the half empty bullpen with worried eyes, his gaze lingering at Tony's empty chair before reluctantly turning to the desk directly opposite him. He was worried about Tony, more so than about Gibbs. There wasn't anything he could do about the injuries Gibbs had sustained; it was out of his hands and possibly out of the hands of the medical personnel as well if Abby's assessment was accurate.

He shuddered as he recalled having to relay to her the awful news from Iraq. It didn't help that the details were sketchy and all he had been told was that Gibbs had been shot by the kid and was on a medical transport back to DC with Tony.

Abby, as well as the rest of the team, had weathered through more than their fair share of bad news. _Kate, Jenny, Franks, Jackie Vance, Jackson Gibbs_ , _McGee's own father_ , _Diane…_ Hell, Dorneget had only been dead for less than three weeks. It was all too much too soon. Gibbs' and his father was the only ones whose deaths had not been due to violence. McGee supposed he had expected Abby to want to jump on the forensic evidence to "get the guy". He forgot in this case that they already knew who the shooter was.

Tim was unprepared therefore when Abby fell to her knees and screamed as he relayed that their Boss had been gunned down. He was at a loss as to how to help her, awkwardly patting her back and wringing his hands. He felt like a total dolt and a failure at comforting his friend. Fortunately for McGee, Abby's anguished episode did not last long, and she was able to compose herself somewhat. She then shooed him away and told him to leave her alone. McGee wasn't about to do that but Abby practically escorted him out of the lab. He turned to Ducky for advice but the doctor was too busy to offer solace. McGee had then tried to talk to Delilah about it but she was under lock down for some case he was not privy to and presently unavailable. That left Bishop, who was like a lost puppy at the moment.

While she had been insulated at NSA, the worse injury she ever had to worry about was a paper cut. In the span of less than a year, she had experienced Gibbs and McGee shot down in a helicopter; Diane, Gibbs' and Fornell's shared ex-wife, murdered in cold blood; Dorneget getting killed in an explosion, Gibbs almost blown up on a bus by a young suicide bomber and now he was in critical condition after being shot twice by another young disciple of "The Calling".

McGee looked over at Bishop, her deep frown lines a permanent feature that marred her pretty looks. He wasn't really sure what she was working on other than it was a cold case. That was what they had been given: _friggin' cold boring cases_. Vance took them off rotation, so no new cases for the elite team, thank you very much.

McGee had been shocked that Tony had been sent home. He didn't get the full details from Vance, as he wasn't in a sharing mood. He had made it clear that it was Tony's idea but McGee didn't believe it considering the way Tony stomped out of the squad room. He was reasonably sure that Vance didn't blame Tony for what happened in Iraq, but he wasn't positive. The team's body count was climbing and he had heard the rumblings of concern regarding their recent failures:

" _Gibbs has lost his edge" "DiNozzo hasn't been with the program since Ziva left" "Bishop is too green to be on the team in the first place" "McGee belongs with the nerds in the basement, not on a major crime unit."_

If McGee was aware of the rumors and whispers he knew sure as hell that Vance was as well. And God knows what the higher ups thought about things in the House of NCIS. As far as anyone outside the orange walls may be concerned, the structure was crumbling and in serious danger of imploding.

"I guess I'm in charge." He murmured to himself. It brought him no satisfaction, and not for the first time he worried that Gibbs might not come back, even if he survived his injuries. The chest injury was the most grievous, but even if he survived _that_ his knee injury was definitely a deal breaker for him to be out in the field again. What would happen to the team? Would they stay intact with Tony permanently in charge or would they be scattered to the wind and Vance bring in a whole new team as the lead MCRT?

McGee began to wonder if he should look for a new job while it was still his idea. Sadly, he opened his personal documents file and pulled up his resume. He hadn't updated it since he had been offered the job in Okinawa and that was…God it was so long ago he couldn't exactly remember. Ziva had been extremely supportive and had encouraged him, but was still pleased that he ultimately decided to remain with the team.

 _Ziva._

McGee wondered if Tony had thought to somehow find a way to let her know about Gibbs. He thought she would want to be informed, especially…

" _No, not going there. Not yet."_ McGee scolded himself. McGee was ever the optimist, and despite all evidence to the contrary, he believed that Gibbs would be back and everything would go back to normal. He really _did_ believe that…

 _Didn't he?_

"I need to go." McGee popped up out of his chair as if he had been shot out of a cannon. Bishop dropped the folder she had been holding, startled by his sudden movement and announcement.

"Where are you going?" She called out, but all she saw was a retreating back and all she heard was the swooshing sound of the elevating doors closing, leaving her alone with no idea what she was supposed to be doing.

 **Thanks again for reviewing and I hope you enjoy the chapter.**

 _ **I am also not a Bishop fan although I appreciate that many of you like her. She will not be bashed in this story but she will also not play an important part. She will mostly be a card board cut out.**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Once again I am amazed by the reviews for this story. Thank you so much for your continued support. This chapter is a bit shorter as it became unreasonably long and I had to find a good cut off point to break it up into separate chapters. The good news is that I have a good start to the next chapter!**

" _ **No, not going there. Not yet." McGee scolded himself. McGee was ever the optimist, and despite all evidence to the contrary, he believed that Gibbs would be back and everything would go back to normal. He really did believe that…**_

 _ **Didn't he?**_

" _ **I need to go." McGee popped up out of his chair as if he had been shot from a cannon. Bishop dropped the folder she had been holding, startled by his sudden movement and announcement.**_

" _ **Where are you going?" She called out, but all she saw was a retreating back and all she heard was the swooshing sound of the elevating doors closing, leaving her alone with no idea what she was supposed to be doing.**_

" **Lost and Found" – Chapter Four**

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda**

Ziva stood outside the automatic doors to the Surgical Intensive Care unit, uncertain as to whether or not she should even be here. She had stood passively by as Tony flashed his badge and spoke quietly to the nurses. She was inwardly pleased that he had seemed totally oblivious to the batting eyelashes of the young nurse who had rushed over to take part in the conversation and thought the nurse was acting somewhat inappropriately but what did she really know?

She stepped back as she caught sight of Tony heading in her direction. His smile was warm, but tired. She hoped that Gibbs had not taken a turn for the worse, but even that unwelcome bit of news hardened her resolve that she needed to see _him._

" _Do this for him."_ Ziva was perceptive enough to realize that Tony had been disappointed that he had not been the mysterious "him" scrawled on her childhood musings all those months ago. And in many respects, she _did_ consider Tony when she wrote the enigmatic words. She needed to do many things, for many people. But she needed to prove herself to only one person from her viewpoint: Leroy Jethro Gibbs.

Gibbs was the one who stood by her and took a chance by signing her application to be an NCIS Agent. It would be up to her to pass her Citizenship Exam and be allowed to stay in the United States; but that meant nothing to her if she wouldn't be able to stay with the team. Her reasons for wanting to stay were many and complicated, and Tony had certainly been a part of the equation. But in the end it was Gibbs who made the decision that enabled her to embark on the next phase of her life and to remove herself from the iron hand of Eli David and Mossad.

"He's still unconscious but you can go in." Tony's voice was quiet and Ziva knew him well enough that he was keeping the emotions at bay. Ziva nodded and turned to follow him through the maze of glassed-in rooms, almost every one filled with someone's loved one.

Tony placed his hand at the small of her back to guide her for the rest of the way. Ziva found comfort in the touch, but as she reached the threshold she turned, hesitant and unsure.

"It's ok Ziva; he'll want to see you." Tony smiled softly, and once again Ziva was amazed at how astute Tony was to her thoughts and concerns. She returned the smile and touched his arm.

"If it is ok, if you don't mind…I think I would like to see him…alone." Tony studied Ziva's face to make sure she was ok. Outwardly, Gibbs looked fine; at least he looked a hell of a lot better than the last time he was in ICU. He remembered when he and Jenny…

Tony stopped that train of thought, too many ghosts in the room. Tony gave her a slight push of encouragement to continue into the room. "I'll be right here." Ziva gave him one last look, grateful at his understanding, and walked past the curtain that was surrounding the bed.

"Oh Gibbs." Ziva whispered as she at last laid eyes on the man she had once told she considered a father to her. And as any daughter who felt that she had disappointed a parent, she felt the urgent need to apologize for her transgressions and to ask for forgiveness.

 _Before it was too late._

Ziva pulled the lone chair closer to the high tech hospital bed and sat, taking the cool motionless hand into her own. "It is I, Gibbs. I…I came as soon as I heard the news." Ziva felt uncomfortable and foolish. There were many things she needed to say to this man, but she was now at a loss to express her feelings and thoughts.

"I know that you were upset with me, when I would not come back. You _said_ you understood, but I…I knew that you did not. You gave me so much, and you must have thought I was throwing it all away." Ziva hung her head and felt the tears slide down her cheeks. "Maybe I _did_ throw it all away but that was never my intention." Her voice was husky, a mere whisper.

Mike nudged Gibbs as they stood at the foot of the bed. Gibbs had been startled to see Ziva come into the room with Tony, although in retrospect nothing should surprise him since all of this seemed to be some sort of dream-slash-nightmare anyway.

"Well if it isn't the _Lady Ziva_." Mike Franks' voice was full of admiration, with a slight hint of inappropriate lust. "Just as lovely as I remember."

Gibbs gave a half smile at Mike's affectionate moniker, but the smile dissolved into a frown as Ziva began her halting speech. Damn right he had been upset when she finally called him to say she would not be returning! And maybe he did understand but he didn't like it. And he sure as _hell_ didn't like the mess she left behind with DiNozzo…

Gibbs looked over his shoulder at Tony, who was sitting quietly in a chair just outside the room. He seemed tense but that could be because Gibbs was laying half-dead in an ICU bed ten feet away from him.

Mike gave him a head slap. "What are you worrying about DiNozzo for? She's the one sitting at your beside, crying for God's sake." Franks looked Gibbs in the eye, forcing him to focus on his words.

"I told you… _unfinished business_."

Gibbs cocked his head as he considered the comment and looked closely at Mike's profile. "Mine or hers?" He asked bluntly.

"Is there any difference?"

Gibbs turned anguished eyes back toward Ziva, as she bowed her head and murmured what sounded like prayers in Hebrew.

"Prayers may not be enough this time, Probie. You need to start thinking about how you want to leave this world…and the legacy you leave behind."

Gibbs peered back at Franks. "It seems to me that I don't get that choice. If I leave this world it will be because some brainwashed kid shot me!" Franks shook his head sadly.

"But you _did_ make that choice, Gibbs. That's what I'm trying to get through that thick skull of yours. You knew it the moment you heard his voice. You knew it the moment you turned and saw that kid looking at you." Franks stepped beside Gibbs and got right into his face.

"They _all_ left you, didn't they? So what's the point in hanging around? Go on, give up; see if I care." Franks faded away and Gibbs was left alone, his face ashen. He felt confused and the loss of control was maddening to him. Ever since the horror of seeing Diane die right in front of him, the details in exact tandem with Kate's death, he had been floundering, unable to concentrate and make decisions that were based on fact and not emotion. The guilt he felt at her death ate away at him until it threatened to consume him. Just like the guilt he felt about Kate, and Jenny.

 _And Ziva_.

Gibbs raised his eyes and looked intently at the young woman still grasping his hand. He did feel guilt at her decision to leave. He hadn't done his job and protected her the way he should have. He should have made sure she would be safe from the Eli David's of the world and he should have comforted her in her sorrow instead of encouraging her in her revenge. He and Vance had sanctioned Ziva with capturing Bodnar. If he happened to die in the process…well, those things happen and wasn't it just _too damn bad_.

He knew that Ziva did not murder Bodnar and that his death had been an accident. Just as he also knew that if Bodnar had lived, Ziva would have been killed. There was no question as to the desired outcome. The subsequent events had been harrowing and Gibbs could see in retrospect how betrayed Ziva must have felt to have been targeted: Once again the outsider, a rogue, a wild card; not to be trusted, seen as only able to respond to violence with violence.

And what was his response? He went away and hid in a damn cabin and told them to mind their own business. He saw how distressed Ziva was at his words, but he sent DiNozzo to calm her down, instead of going himself. He always had Tony to do his work for him because that's what Senior Field Agents do, and besides… _it's a sign of weakness_.

Gibbs felt his knees go weak, understanding dawning in his fragile state. He wiped at the beads of perspiration that had started to form on his forehead as he struggled to get closer to Ziva. His face only a fraction from hers, he bent down to whisper the words he had always refused to say.

Ziva flinched slightly and looked perplexed. She turned her face and gazed over her shoulder, expecting someone to be standing there but the room only held the same two occupants as before. Suddenly, the cardiac monitor alarm sounded, indicating that Gibb's heart rate was climbing and erratic. Ziva stood abruptly, her chair crashing to the hard tiled floor behind her.

Gibbs startled and backed away as first Tony and then several nurses rushed into the room. Tony immediately went to Ziva's side and clutched at her, trying to hold her upright as she watched the medical personnel swarm over Gibbs. After a few tense moments, the alarms ceased and order was somewhat restored.

The older nurse turned to the pair and smiled reassuringly. "He's ok, his sedation was wearing off and the pain caused the spike in the heart rate. I've adjusted his dosage and he should be more comfortable now." The nurse smiled again, jotted a few numbers down in her chart and then left Tony and Ziva alone with Gibbs. Tony let out his breath, suddenly aware that he had been holding it in. Realizing he was hovering over Ziva, he dropped his arms and took a step aside, not wanting to invade her space and make her too uncomfortable.

Ziva had not really noticed that Tony had her in his arms until he released his hold. The difference was marked, as if she had been thrust out of a warm safe cocoon into an empty hostile environment. She longed to be back in that safe place with Tony, where she felt secure and cared for. Ziva had been her own caretaker for so long that she had forgotten what it was like to have someone's strong arms around you that were not there to inflict harm; to comfort and not control; to alleviate, not agitate.

Without thinking, Ziva reached for Tony's hand and clutched it, her hand vise-like around his. Tony's eyes stayed focused on Gibbs, but he managed a comforting squeeze to acknowledge her distress. Her mind immediately began to calm, grateful once more for Tony's uncanny ability to understand her and to make things better.

Satisfied that Gibbs was stable for the moment, Tony stooped to pick up Ziva's purse and handed it to her. He gently led her out of the room, walking silently through the sterile and cold hospital unit and into the only slightly more inviting family waiting area around the corner. He sat Ziva down on the sofa and quickly went to the counter to pour her a cup of ice water, bringing it back to her which she took gratefully. Tony sat down as well, his thigh touching hers as she gulped the cool liquid. "Ok there?" He smiled sympathetically as she finished the last sip.

Ziva leaned against him slightly and nodded. "Yes, thank you. It was harder to see Gibbs like that than I had imagined…so still and pale. The last time I visited him in the hospital he was awake and up and about, even if he didn't know who I was." Ziva sighed sadly. Tony grimaced slightly at the second reminder of the day of the ship bombing that almost killed his boss. They were in some serious need of levity or the day was going to descend into the bowels of such maudlin moroseness that Tony feared they would never be able crawl out of it.

That was definitely _not_ on his agenda for an unexpected but welcomed day off. Tony wracked his brain trying to figure out a way to lift their spirits and hopefully try to enjoy the remaining hours. Remembering their breakfast discussion, he got a gleam in his eye and stood up quickly and held out his hand to Ziva.

She eyed him speculatively, arching an eyebrow at his grin. "What are you up to?" She asked suspiciously, but not too worried. Tony helped her to her feet and squeezed her hand.

"I have just the thing for you to get rid of that stress and put a smile on your face."

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center Parking Garage- Bethesda**

Tim pulled the ticket from the machine as he entered the large multi-storied structure. His sudden need to see Gibbs was unexplainable but he knew he had to act on his impulse. He did feel bad about bolting and leaving Bishop to her own devices, though.

McGee sighed, shaking his head at his delusional thoughts as to how to wake his Boss from his comatose state. He looked down at the Buck mortise chisel he had lifted from Gibbs' basement. He had this brilliant idea that maybe if Gibbs had something of his own with him, it would somehow reach into the depths of his closed mind and cause him to awaken. He had taken a quick detour to Gibbs' home, feeling somewhat like he was breaking and entering even if the door had remained unlocked this entire time.

McGee locked the car door and headed for the stairway to the main level. A passing car got his attention and he stood in shock as he was positive he just saw Tony drive past with a passenger who looked just like…

 _No, Ziva was in Israel, wasn't she?_ Maybe Tony did get in touch with her after all, as he had considered this morning. A wave of nostalgia and sadness hit Tim full in the chest, remembering when they were the "Three Musketeers". It hadn't all been fun and games, but it had been theirs and it had been a significant part of Tim's training as an NCIS agent.

He owed much to the skills of Ziva David. But it was her kindness and friendship he missed more than anything. Hoping that his eyes hadn't been playing tricks on him, his heart lightened a bit and he continued on his journey, unaware that the object he now held in his hand had been a thank you gift from the person now occupying his thoughts.

 **Lots of angst and concern here, and lots more to come. For those who don't remember, the first ep with Ziva after her rescue she went to visit Gibbs in his basement and gave him a Buck mortise chisel. Next chapter: Ziva reveals some of what she has been doing since she stayed in Israel. Thanks again for reading and leaving a review.**


	5. Chapter 5

_**McGee locked the car door and headed for the stairway to the main level. A passing car got his attention and he stood in shock as he was positive he just saw Tony drive past with a passenger who looked just like…**_

 _ **No, Ziva was in Israel, wasn't she? Maybe Tony did get in touch with her after all, as he had considered this morning. A wave of nostalgia and sadness hit Tim full in the chest, remembering when they were the "Three Musketeers". It hadn't all been fun and games, but it had been theirs and it had been a significant part of Tim's training as an NCIS agent.**_

 _ **He owed much to the skills of Ziva David. But it was her kindness and friendship he missed more than anything. Hoping that his eyes hadn't been playing tricks on him, his heart lightened a bit and he continued on his journey, unaware that the object he now held in his hand had been a thank you gift from the person now occupying his thoughts.**_

 **Usual Disclaimers…**

" **Lost and Found" - Chapter Five**

 **Montgomery Mall- Bethesda, Maryland**

Tony looked up from his comfortable position in the "significant other" day care part of the Mall. It wasn't _really_ a day care, but it was clearly an escape for husbands, boyfriends, designated drivers… _whatevers_ …who needed to be around but had no desire to partake in the horror of shopping for clothes. Tony was watching ESPN on a huge flat screen, enjoying the Nationals play the Rays. The large air-conditioned area was quiet and relaxing, the coffee the best he had tasted since that very morning.

He saw Ziva in his peripheral vision struggling with multiple clothes bags from Nordstrom's and Lord and Taylor. He got up quickly and relieved her of what looked to be the heaviest parcel. Tony smiled comically at her, delighted to see this side of Ziva. "Did you buy out the store?"

Ziva chuckled and shook her head. "Almost, yes; but not quite. Oh thank you, Tony; that one is quite awkward to hold." She looked around at the room, smiling at the game. "Do you want to finish your playing?" Tony glanced back toward the monitor. It was a pretty good game but he didn't want to waste time watching it while Ziva was around.

"Nah, I'm good to go. Let's get this stuff out to the car and then we can get something to drink and walk around the lake. It's really nice outside and I don't often get a chance to just enjoy being out and about."

Ziva widened her smile surprise. She had noticed the lake as they drove around the area that led to the Mall. Her interest had been peaked but she didn't want to abuse Tony's good nature at taking her on her errands to indulge her desire to look at something _pretty_. She was inwardly pleased that he seemed to be enjoying this time with her as much as she was enjoying being with him.

He had witnessed her distress at seeing Gibbs and immediately decided that she needed to expend some pent up energy by shopping till she dropped. No, that wasn't what he said, was it? Ziva shook her head. She would _never_ understand the American idioms. But he had been correct in his assessment. She tore through the stores and bought so many clothes she wasn't sure where she wasn't going to put them all.

That stopped her for a moment. Where _was_ she going to put them? They still hadn't discussed the living arrangements, temporary though they might be. Tony had a huge walk-in closet, but she also knew from past experience that is was quite full with expensive, designer suits. She felt a lump in her throat at the thought of going elsewhere, but she didn't see any alternative. She put aside those thoughts to concentrate on the here and now as Tony handed her a large cold container of lemonade.

They walked slowly around the man-made lake, the sun dazzling their eyes as its rays reflected off of the gentle spray of the abstract sculpture doubling as a fountain in the middle of the bright blue water.

Ziva smiled and lifted her face as a soft wind blew some of the spray onto her skin, savoring the welcome coolness in respite from the heat of the afternoon sun. She looked over at Tony, who was looking out over the lake, shielding his eyes. "What do you see?" She asked quietly.

Ziva turned her own eyes in the direction Tony was looking and saw what had caught his attention. A young woman was sitting alone on a bench, her dark hair pulled back tightly except for an errant strand that she kept twisting in her fingers. She seemed deep in thought, but did not appear to be in distress. It was clear to the casual observer that she wanted no company, that the only conversations she wanted to have were one-sided.

"Do you know her?" Ziva voice interrupted his thoughts and not for the first time did he think that her accent was a bit more pronounced. More like when she first arrived all those years ago…

"No, I don't know her. But I knew someone just like her."

Ziva sucked in her breath and looked away, anxious that the words had finally had been spoken. She wondered when Tony…or even _if_ Tony…was going to bring up the past and what had happened between them in Israel. She had been waiting for him to take the lead on how to proceed and apparently he had just thrown the ball into her court.

Ziva walked a few steps away and stopped at a lovely bench, its carvings intricate and beautiful. She thought of Gibbs and sanding with the grain and all of his boats and…

"Ziva, do you want to sit?" Tony was at her elbow, looking at her with slight concern. She took a deep breath and nodded imperceptibly, sitting down where the shade was best.

Ziva cast a wary gaze toward Tony, knowing it was time to clear the air but nervous as to how it should all be played out. "I had told you that in order for me to atone for my sins, to find out the person I needed to be and _wanted_ to be; I told you that in order for me to do that I needed to be alone." Ziva's words were hesitant and she paused as she collected her thoughts, not wanting to say too much but knowing that Tony deserved so much more.

"I remember. I was there." Tony's voice held no rancor, but his words were not spoken in humor either. Ziva nodded her head, acknowledging and accepting the point he was making.

"I truly believed that by being alone; totally alone; would be the only way for me to find peace. And so I cut myself off: from everyone and everything. I had no phone, no television or radio; no books, no music. I saw no one and no one saw me. I became a recluse, with only the world outside my door as my companion." Ziva took a long sip from her lemonade, needing to relieve the dryness in her mouth.

"Sounds like you were communing with nature." Tony quipped lightly. He hadn't expected her to take her comment about being alone so literally and was quite surprised that was the route she had pursued in her quest.

"Yes, a commune of one. And it was not very pleasant, I have to admit. I had too much time to think and condemn myself and with no one there to tell me otherwise, I traveled a dangerous path. The nightmares were…" Ziva shuddered and couldn't continue.

Tony placed his hand lightly on her shoulder. "New ones or old ones?" Tony had vivid memories of the nightmares Ziva had suffered from as a result of her captivity in Somalia. As far as he knew though, those demons had long been exorcised.

Ziva closed her eyes in painful memory. Tony had been instrumental in helping her to overcome the effects of Somalia and she was disturbed that she couldn't remember if she had ever thanked him for his companionship and help during that difficult time.

She smiled sadly and turned slightly toward him. "Both." Tony winced at her admission and berated himself for not staying in Israel longer, despite her own desires.

She placed her hand on his that was resting on her shoulder and gave it a slight squeeze. He reluctantly withdrew, feeling he needed to keep some space between them even if it was only inches. "They eventually went away and after a month I realized that being alone was _not_ in my best interest."

Tony listened carefully, making sure he heard and understood this self-confessional. He had wanted to know exactly what Ziva had been doing once he had made the _hardest 180 in his life_. He was finally getting his wish and he didn't want to miss a single moment that she was willing to share.

"I decided to go to into the city of Beer Sheva and found myself at a center for displaced women and children of the Gaza conflict. It was an enlightening and humbling experience, and it made me realize how selfish my concerns for myself were. These innocents had suffered greatly at the hands of others, their families torn apart by violence." Ziva closed her eyes as she remembered the haunted faces.

"To them, I was not an evil, dangerous person. I was a young Israeli woman, similar and familiar; comforting and not threatening. They did not accuse me of having an agenda, or not being worthy of trust or seeking only revenge instead of justice. I was just…Ziva David." Ziva looked away as tears threaten to fall.

Tony swallowed as the bile rose into his throat. Ziva's admission of her self-interpretation was heart breaking. But it was the unspoken accusation that others perhaps had seen her in the same way that was a knife to his heart. The only _others_ that would have mattered to her were the team, and by the _team_ he knew that she meant him and Gibbs.

"Ziva…" Tony started to cut in, to say that he had never thought any of those things but he realized with a shock that it was not true. He _had_ worried during the Rivkin debacle that she could not be trusted, and of having an agenda that was not necessarily best for the team. He did worry that her hunt for Bodnar had been fueled solely by revenge and she had no interest in justice being served. In that instant, Tony hated himself and believed that he had totally failed her…as a partner and as a friend. No wonder she wanted to be alone.

Ziva sensed his inner turmoil, understanding that he had adopted her words of self-loathing as his own. This time she took his hand, and threaded her fingers through his reminiscent of their return from Berlin. "I did not do many things to justify my actions, Tony. Mine is the only blame." Tony looked away to erase his thoughts and try to get things back on track. He nodded, and cleared his throat.

"So then what happened? Have you been there all this time?" Tony kept his eyes trained on the ducks that were lazily floating by, keeping his eyes off of Ziva. He still hadn't quite gotten over his disquiet, but he didn't want her to feel guilty about it either.

"Not all of this time, no; but I was there for several months. It was a liberating experience for me, Tony. I felt, for the first time in a really long time that I was helping instead of harming, that I was making a positive impact on the people around me. This was a good thing." She stressed the importance of what she was saying by squeezing his hand. Tony finally did turn to look at her, smiling at the look of contentment and happiness on her face and felt an intense release.

"So what did you do there? I mean, did you have a specific job?" Tony craved to hear more about _"Just Ziva David"_ and smiled genuinely at her in encouragement. Ziva chuckled and smiled back, her enjoyment in the telling of her story a sharp contrast to how it began.

"I was the cook." She said simply.

"Really?" Tony's eyes bugged out slightly but then he sat back. As incongruous as it sounded, it made perfect sense. Ziva had many talents that didn't involve lethal weapons and cooking was very high on the list. Ziva nodded with enthusiasm and began to tell him about the meals she had cooked and how the kitchen was set-up and by her third story Tony was laughing so hard his sides began to hurt.

"It felt so wonderful to be able to help these poor people and I felt so good and free and I began to think that maybe I was not so terrible after all. In fact I decided to come back…" Ziva's eyes flew open in alarm as she realized she may have said something she had not intended to.

Tony was totally captivated by Ziva's exuberance as she shared her life in Israel after he had left. Her eyes were large and luminous and her hands waved in animation as she told her story. He was so enthralled by her voice and happy demeanor that he almost missed the significance and importance of her unfinished sentence.

 _Almost._

Tony frowned slightly once his brain had caught up with her words. "What? Wait! What do you mean you decided to come back? Here? _When?_ " Tony's heart was hammering in his chest. Did Ziva really just say she had intended to return and if so, what happened that caused her to change her mind?

Ziva's face had paled, and her eyes had a slightly panicked looked, darting everywhere except at Tony. She got up and went to the pretty railing that surrounded the lake, and gripped it tightly. She had not meant to reveal her aborted plans and now she was desperately trying to think of something to say to that would make the words disappear and be forgotten.

Tony followed her quickly and looked at her with an intensity that she found comforting and alarming at the same time. "Ziva, you just said you were coming home. I think I deserve an explanation. When was this?"

Ziva searched his face for some sign that he was angry at her, but all she saw was surprise, worry and disappointment. The last made her look quickly away, aware that she was again the cause of his distress. Taking a deep breath, she yielded to the inevitable and hoped that they would all emerge unscathed.

"April." Ziva looked at Tony's expression from beneath her lashes, her hopes dashed that this would be a simple conversation.

Tony looked at her in confusion, his jaw muscles tightening as they always did when he felt stress and didn't like what he was hearing. "What do you mean April; this past April?" Tony wasn't sure how much time had elapsed in the adventures that Ziva had been sharing but he didn't think it had occurred over such a long period of time. But then that would mean…

"No, Tony; it was April of last year. I made the decision then that I was ready…to come home." Ziva lowered her eyes as she remembered how excited and happy she was when she realized what she wanted to do.

Tony looked like he had been slapped in the face; his shock at her words could not have been more pronounced. He leaned closer to her so that his lips almost touched her face. Keeping his tone even, he voiced the questions that needed to be answered in order to make sense of all of this.

"Why didn't you come home, then? _Why did you change your mind?_ " Tony was trying very hard to not make this about him. She didn't say after all that she had decided to come home to _Tony_ ; only that she had decided to come back to DC.

Ziva shook her head, not wanting to discuss it any further. Tony realized how unhappy she was and tried to calm her down. He placed his hand on her arm and gave it a slight squeeze. "It's ok Ziva. It's _OK_. I really just want to know what happened." Which wasn't quite true: Tony desperately wanted to know if he was any part of the reason for her decision to return, but he knew he needed to tread lightly.

Ziva looked at Tony, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. She knew what she was about to say would upset him but he was giving her no choice. She looked deeply into his eyes, unwittingly lowering them to gaze at his lips. She shuddered slightly and looked away.

"Some time had passed and I knew that…things may have changed. I wanted to make sure that my return would be accepted and welcomed." She paused to clear her throat and gather courage.

Tony was getting a very bad vibe from what Ziva was relaying, but he didn't know why. There was something else going on here, something was not quite right.

"I thought I should talk to someone first before I just, you know, showed up. I…" Ziva's voice broke slightly and she struggled to continue. "I was told that I should not come."

 _ **Rut Roh! Thanks so much for the wonderful reviews, faves and follows. I am trying to get ahead as I will be in a hotel for a week for our annual convention and not sure I will be able to write or post anything.**_


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks again for the huge support for this story. As I stated in the last chapter I will be in a hotel this coming week and not sure I will be able to write or post. This chapter was originally all Tony and Ziva, but I decided I needed to break that up a bit. As a result, I am not entirely happy with this chapter. You will find that the conversation Gibbs has with Mike is rambling and perhaps confusing: this represents the state of Gibbs' mind at the moment but I can appreciate it may be a difficult read. Lots of quotes from past episodes in here. LOTS. And I DO know that this will not happen on the show…any of it. That's why I'm writing it.**

 **Usual disclaimers: I should own them all…**

 _ **Ziva looked at Tony, her eyes brimming with unshed tears. She knew what she was about to say would upset him but he was giving her no choice. She looked deeply into his eyes, unwittingly lowering them to gaze at his lips. She shuddered slightly and looked away.**_

" _ **Some time had passed and I knew that…things may have changed. I wanted to make sure that my return would be accepted and welcomed." She paused to clear her throat and gather courage.**_

 _ **Tony was getting a very bad vibe from what Ziva was relaying, but he didn't know why. There was something else going on here, something was not quite right.**_

" _ **I thought I should talk to someone first before I just, you know, showed up. I…" Ziva's voice broke slightly and she struggled to continue. "I was told that I should not come."**_

" **Lost and Found"- Chapter Six**

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda, Maryland**

McGee stepped into the ICU room and looked around, grimacing at the monitors and machinery keeping his Boss alive. He craned his neck to peer outside the door, making sure no one was watching him too closely.

"I got something for you, Boss. Well, _I_ didn't get it for you, it's already yours; I mean you own it." McGee closed his mouth and looked out of the door again as he fingered the chisel he had hidden in his jacket pocket. He rolled his eyes in embarrassment at his actions. "Don't babble, Tim. You sound like an idiot."

"That's for damn sure." Mike had his arms crossed in front of him. If he was being honest with himself, and he always _was_ ; McGee had never been at the top of his list as the go-to guy at NCIS. He was a Probie, through and through, and no amount of training or years of experience would ever change that as far as he was concerned.

Gibbs looked sideways at Franks, not entirely happy that he had decided to make another appearance. He still hadn't quite recovered from Ziva's visit and wasn't sure he could handle any more emotional outbursts.

"This is a damn NCIS reunion today. Where's the cake and balloons? Wait a minute, the hell with that! Where're the dancing girls?" Franks was gleefully enjoying himself and totally oblivious to Gibbs' discomfort.

"Mike…" Gibbs' voice was quiet but it got his companion's attention. Franks continued to smirk, but kept his comments to himself, for the time being.

Gibbs had his eyes glued on his Agent. McGee had stepped up to the plate the last two years, especially when Tony had been MIA while searching for Ziva, and frankly for months after his return. His Senior Field Agent may have been physically present but he had not always been with the program mentally and emotionally.

Gibbs had been exasperated when he realized what Tony was up to, searching for Ziva for selfish personal reasons and not solely to bring her back to the team. That he had failed was of no great comfort to Gibbs, but only in that Ziva chose to not return. He blamed Tony for the rocky months that ensued and for trying to start things with her to begin with. He finally settled down, but Gibbs had lost his confidence in his ability to separate work and home. He had been extremely frustrated with DiNozzo; so much in fact that he had long talks with Ducky about the situation.

" _Rule Twelve, Duck. It's there for a reason. What was DiNozzo thinking, trying to get Ziva to come back with him as his girlfriend? You can't have both, I know; I tried. It doesn't work and I'll be damned if I allow it on my team."_

 _Ducky nodded sagely. "So perhaps it was best that Ziva did not return. Is that what you are saying, Jethro?"_

Gibbs shook his head at his memory of the conversation. That was NOT what he wanted; he didn't want Ziva to stay in Israel, but he also didn't want DiNozzo and Ziva to start an office fling. What he _wanted_ was for things to go back the way they had been. His three Agents working together as they always had. It had never occurred to him at the time that Ziva would return and NOT be an Agent.

"Can't always get what you want, Probie."

"Tell that to DiNozzo." Gibbs spat back. Franks rounded on him, shoving him in the shoulder.

"You don't think he knows that? You don't think his heart bled every time he looked at my lovely senorita's desk? What makes you any better than him? Or him?" Franks hiked a thumb in the direction of McGee, who was still awkwardly standing by the bedside.

"You think you're the only one who can claim a broken heart because Ziva didn't die, and Shannon and Kelly and Diane did? What about McGee and his poor, crippled girlfriend? You don't think he deserved to cry and rail at the world for the injustice of it all?"

Gibbs glared at Mike, not particularly pleased with the reminders about his wives and daughter, but Mike was just getting started. "I suppose you think that DiNozzo was thinking with his other head, huh? That whatever feelings he "thought" he was having should have just disappeared the minute Ziva said no?" Franks got into his face and stabbed his finger at Gibbs's chest.

"That man has stood by your side for what? Almost seventeen years? And you got pissed at him for trying to actually have a life? What in the hell is wrong with you, Gibbs? So obsessed with your bad guys, you forgot there are good guys right there with you!" Franks started coughing, reminding Gibbs of the last time he saw him alive.

Gibbs put his hand on his arm in an effort to calm him down, but Mike was having none of it. "Don't you remember what you told DiNozzo? _'Don't be like me'_ you said. But that's exactly what you want, from all of your team. No lives beyond that orange prison you call home, because you sure as hell don't have one of your own." Gibb's face reddened in anger at the accusations being thrown his way.

"That's not true, Mike and you know it!" Gibbs snapped back. "I encouraged DiNozzo to try again with Wendy. I was nothing but positive with his relationship with Zoe." Mike just rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Oh, yeah… _right_. As long as it wasn't with a member of your team, or any NCIS team, it was ok by you. What I want to know is this; what makes you think you should have any say about who DiNozzo wants to be with in the first place. Just because you blew it with Jenny…"

"MIKE!" Gibbs yelled, his chest heaving with the exertion. Once again, the monitor alarm sounded as his heart rate spiked in response to his outrage. Gibbs willed himself to relax, pleased when he saw his heart rate normalizing into a more acceptable range.

"Didn't mean to scare your Probie." Mike pointed at McGee, who was white as a sheet after the alarms had sounded. Franks chuckled as Tim looked around and grabbed a tissue to wipe the perspiration from his forehead.

"Now, where was I?" Franks began again after he got bored watching McGee.

"Getting ready to leave?" Gibbs suggested hopefully.

Mike looked pained. "I'm only here because you need me to be here, Gibbs. Don't you get that yet? Oh, yeah. I was talking about how everything has to be your way, and you just presume that your Agents will automatically drop everything in their lives to help you with your asinine notion that the bad guys are all after you personally, and you know what presuming makes you; and then you fester and bleed as you obsess over them, until…"

Gibbs frowned. "Presume? I think you mean assume, don't you?"

Mike waggled his hand. "Presume; assume…you're still an ass. And you're missing the point!"

Gibbs regarded Mike silently as he considered his latest accusation. He didn't have a notion that these jackals were after him: he knew it for a fact! Obsessed? Well, he had every right to go after Pedro Hernandez after what he did to his family…

"Thinking about it some, aren't you. I don't wrong you for going after that Mexican Bastard, Gibbs. Would have done it myself if I could have." Mike rubbed his neck in frustration. "But what about after that? Ari Haswari or however in the hell you pronounce his name? He held Ducky and Kate and Gerald hostage but what got your goat was that he had the nerve to shoot you! Can't say your refusal to let it go ended too well for you, did it now." Gibbs winced at Mike's implied accusation, and truth be told he did blame himself for Kate's death.

"And then the Double Mint twins…" Gibbs smirked at Franks' nickname for the Reynosa siblings. "I had a hand in that, so I guess I can't make you take all the blame." Mike added generously.

"Gee, thanks." Gibbs snarled sarcastically.

"And The Frog, as Jenny liked to call him; that was really her deal so I'll give you a pass there too. But then came Harper Dearing and then there was Parsa, and then Mishnev and now Budd and his Stepford kids. Tell me, Gibbs. While you were so busy with your own obsessions, who was DiNozzo obsessing about?"

Gibbs looked startled at the change in direction of Mike's litany of complaints. "What do you mean? He worked with me on all of those cases." He didn't understand where Mike was going with all of this.

Franks just shook his head sadly. "Well, yeah. That was his _job_. But in all the time you have worked with him, what was his obsession? What got his ire up and made him move heaven and earth to get his way?" Gibbs considered the question, if only to humor Mike. Once he really thought about it, he could only think of two times DiNozzo had spent months on a specific goal of his own choosing that could be categorized as an obsession: taking down Saleem Ulman after Ziva was presumed dead, and tracking down Ziva to make sure she was safe from Parsa, and not coincidentally to start a relationship with her.

"Are you beginning to see a pattern here? DiNozzo's only obsessions have been about Ziva. He didn't care about the bad guys, Gibbs. Well, he did because it was his _job_ , but it wasn't his _life_ and that's what I'm saying here. And all you cared about was yourself; you stopped looking beyond your own selfish needs and forgot what was important, the people around you!"

A myriad of memories flashed through Gibbs' brain as Franks' words pierce his heart.

" _Eli is all but dead to me. And the closest thing I have…to a father, is accusing me…"_

" _Isn't this punishing her? I mean, aren't you afraid she might lie to you?" It's tough love." "You do know there are other kinds…"_

" _You tell Eli David to stay away. She's off-limits!"_

" _Tony likes to hide behind the face of a clown, but he's best young Agent I've ever worked with."_

" _I do know that Junior thinks the world of you."_

" _Are you lonely Gibbs?" "You're never alone when you have kids. Goodnight kid."_

" _The plan is I find the rest of my team, Sir."_

" _Must have been nice having someone to talk to…for a little while."_

" _He hurt my family, Tobias."_

" _You worried about her? Then go find her, DiNozzo. Now."_

" _Anything you didn't tell me about Berlin?"_

" _Gibbs, you cannot do this alone. You have to let us help you." "Hey, it is not your job!" " It is not about my job! This about my family!"_

He watched as McGee pulled something out of his pocket and placed it in Gibbs' motionless hand. He sucked in his breath when he realized it was the Buck mortise chisel that Ziva had given him as a gift of thanks, _for leaving her in Israel of all things_ , after she had recovered somewhat from her months in Somalia.

Gibbs had said to her that he only thought of it as a really nice chisel, but it was in reality so much more. It was a symbol of the trust and love Ziva had for him.

The realization of what Mike was trying to get through to him slammed into his chest as quickly and as painfully as the bullet fired by Luke's gun.

He had been so wrong, all this time. "I screwed up big time, Mike." Gibbs choked out.

Mike sighed and crossed his arms, his victory hard-earned but not yet totally won. "So what are you going to do about it?" He glanced over at the still form lying in the bed.

McGee leaned over and briefly touched Gibbs head, but pulled back quickly at this uncharacteristic show of affection. He started to leave but turned back once more to make sure his Boss was still breathing and his heart was still beating. Satisfied that Gibbs was doing as well as he could at the moment, he turned again and left the room, just missing the slight twitch of movement as Gibbs' hand clutched the treasured gift.

 **Mirror Lake at Montgomery Mall- Bethesda, Maryland**

" _I thought I should talk to someone first before I just, you know, showed up. I…" Ziva's voice broke slightly and she struggled to continue. "I was told that I should not come."_

Tony stared at Ziva, his incomprehension of what she had just told him vivid on his face. He was stunned beyond words. And _pissed._

"What do you mean you were told not to come, Ziva? What exactly was said to you, and _who_ said it?" Tony was using his interrogators voice and Ziva could not blame him. She placed her hand on his chest, trying to calm him if that was at all possible; a seemingly impossible task when one was not calm either.

"Tony, it is fine. It will serve no purpose to discuss this. I do not want to be the cause of any friction." She pleaded with him to drop it, to let it be. Tony eyed her curiously, knowing by her words that she had spoken to someone on the team, someone that most definitely had not been him.

He shook his head, his resolve adamant. "No, Ziva. I'm not going to step aside and let this slide. Now tell me what was said to you." It was not a request. Ziva dipped her head in acquiescence and bowed to the inevitable.

"I was told that the team was doing very well without me, that I was not needed and my coming back would only cause turmoil." Ziva looked away, the memory of the conversation now fresh in her mind, the hurt vivid and raw as an open wound.

"Cause turmoil for whom; for the team?" Tony wanted as much clarification as possible before he responded to this new unexpected threat.

"Yes, for the team, but…mostly for you. I was told that you did not want to see me, and to leave you alone and let you get on with your life." Ziva hung her head in despair and Tony realized for the first time that she must have believed those hurtful words; otherwise she wouldn't have stayed in Israel.

Tony took several steps back and crossed his arms, almost as if he was trying to hold his anger within himself, but he was not very successful. Inside he was _seething_. He was wracking his brain to think who among his colleagues could have been so callous and cruel. Alarm bells started going off in his head, as Tony realized that he could think of _two_ specific people who would have tried to prevent Ziva from returning if the opportunity had presented itself.

He looked at Ziva and felt so ashamed. None of this was his fault but once again he felt that he hadn't had her back, that he had not protected her. Tony tried to remember what his frame of mind was a year ago and found it was still a bit of a fog. From his recollection, the team was _not_ doing "very well", it was barely muddling along. He was no longer consumed by thoughts of Ziva but he certainly hadn't decided that he wanted to forget her either. Tony looked at this woman who had been such a huge part of his life and was dismayed to see her so closed up after her previous joy. Thinking of his earlier reticence to read too much into this new development, he nonetheless felt he _had to know_.

Taking time to form his thoughts into what he hoped would not sound like the longing of a desperate man Tony forced himself to ask the question that was lingering between them. "Ziva, I need to ask, I really just need to know…why you decided to come back to DC. Were you coming back to the team or…?" Tony closed his mouth, too afraid to voice the words that he wasn't really sure he wanted to hear.

Ziva sighed and looked down, her hands clasped so tightly that her knuckles were white. "It's ok, Ziva. I mean, whatever your reason for deciding to come back is fine, it's…I was just wondering, you know, if there was a specific reason for your decision or…" Tony stopped, disgusted with how needy and inarticulate he sounded. He groaned in frustration and stepped a few feet away to compose himself.

Ziva looked at this man who had been such a constant in her life for eight years; a man who alternately delighted and maddened her; but when all was said and done, a man she could count on with no hesitation, a man who would, and _had_ , offer to lay his life down for hers; theirs was an unconditional friendship that had always teetered on the brink of something special and yet they somehow usually managed to sabotage it by their actions or inactions. This was a man who deserved an honest answer, and Ziva knew she could not let him down, regardless of his reaction.

Ziva slowly took a few steps so that she was standing in front of Tony. He looked at her cautiously, feeling vulnerable and mostly stupid for calling her out on this. Ziva gently touched his arm to get his attention and looked into his eyes, forcing him to look back at her and listen.

"Tony, when we were in Israel, what did I tell you?" She began softly, her eyes dark with emotion. Tony looked hesitant, not sure exactly what she was asking.

"You told me a lot of things…" He began vaguely. Ziva put her finger to his lips and shook her head.

"You know of what I am speaking, Tony. What did I tell you?" Tony thought back to that evening in her childhood home, after his announcement in the orchard of his desire for Ziva to return to DC with him, in any shape, way or form. To Tony, it didn't matter as long as it was Ziva and she came back… _with him_. He remembered a night of revelations, of sharing thoughts and desires and taking those desires from the spoken word to the physical act. Their lovemaking had been frantic at first, as if they both sensed but tried to deny that this would be it. Afterwards, it was more languid and sensual, but still with a sense of sadness.

"You told me you loved me." Tony looked away as his voice broke. "And then you made me leave." Ziva winced at his summation of the events, but could not fault his memory.

"Yes, I did. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do, Tony. I explained why I needed to do what I was doing; I thought you, of all people would understand." Ziva looked at him, her voice questioning and sad.

Tony sighed, his expression contrite. "I didn't _really_ understand, from my perspective of things. But I understood that _you_ believed that it was what you had to do and so I did what you asked. But I didn't like it. I still don't." Tony's mouth was a thin line, remembering that moment when it finally registered that Ziva was actually _not_ going to come back with him. That she would be staying in Israel and he would not have her in his life.

" _In my life."_ Tony remembered suddenly when Ziva had said those words to him so long ago, when she was teetering on the edge of dumping Ray, and EJ was already a footnote in the Tony DiNozzo book of love. It was ironic that EJ would be the one to make him see what had been in front of him all this time, but he did listen and he did get the message. If Ray hadn't picked that exact moment to call, Tony may have stepped up to the plate and acted on his heart instead of his libido. DAMN IT! Tony was sick and tired of his life being dictated by the actions of others. This newest development was the last straw. _And he really needed to know_.

 **Thanks again for leaving you lovely reviews. Before anyone tells me about all the other times Tony has been obsessed, in my mind obsession lasts over a period of several months. The episode "Obsession" in which Ziva accuses Tony of being obsessed with the missing reporter does not fall into this category. And neither does Jeanne Benoit. Next chapter Ziva tells Tony the reason she was going to return. Stay tuned.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you for the reviews, faves and follows. I am back home, but only just finished this chapter. A few observations: I did not say in the last chapter that Gibbs was the one who turned Ziva away when she called to come back. I did not say who did it at all. Tony doesn't know for sure who Ziva talked to, but he has some suspicions. It will be revealed, but it hasn't yet.**

" _ **In my life." Tony remembered suddenly when Ziva had said those words to him so long ago, when she was teetering on the edge of dumping Ray, and EJ was already a footnote in the Tony DiNozzo book of love. It was ironic that EJ would be the one to make him see what had been in front of him all this time, but he did listen and he did get the message. If Ray hadn't picked that exact moment to call, Tony may have stepped up to the plate and acted on his heart instead of his libido. DAMN IT! Tony was sick and tired of his life being dictated by the actions of others. This newest development was the last straw. And he really needed to know.**_

" **Lost and Found" – Chapter Seven**

"Why did you decide to come back, Ziva?" Tony's voice had lost its hesitation, and Ziva understood exactly what he was asking of her. She slid her hand down his arm and gently clasped his hand.

"Tony, my decision to stay in Israel was made for me, because I was not good to be around, to be with other people including you. My acceptance of this realization was not made because I did not care; it was made because I _did_ care. I had always hoped that I would come to a place within myself that I felt I could return. I came to that place last year. I was coming home to you Tony, if you still wanted me to."

Tony struggled to keep his emotions at bay with this revelation. This past year could have totally been avoided if it wasn't for the meddling of someone close to him who decided to impose to act in his behalf without his permission. His anger flared anew as he considered how in the world he was going to deal with that problem, but first he had another one.

A year had passed since this defining moment for Ziva, and Tony knew from his own personal experience that a lot could happen in twelve months. Tony still cared very deeply for Ziva, but did she still care for Tony in that way? After all, she was really here because of Gibbs and to make sure Tony was handling it ok. Could they just pick up where they left off as if time had stood still?

Tony considered the possibility that Ziva may have moved on as he had, albeit briefly. He was shocked at the wave of jealousy that suddenly appeared. As far as he was concerned, he had no rights to Ziva but he still had this little voice telling him to see this through, no matter the outcome.

Tony set aside his own anger and fear, and placed his hands on her shoulders, turning her to face him. "Ziva, I don't know who you spoke to and one day I _will_ ; but if I had known what your intentions were last year, I wouldn't have just told you to get on the first and fastest plane you could find, I would have gone and brought you back myself."

Tony paused as he considered that possible ramifications of his next words. "I would have given anything to have you back; on the team, not on the team. It didn't matter to me how you came back, as long as you did and you were finally here. I am so sorry you were treated this way. It wasn't fair, and it wasn't the truth. You did not deserve that."

Ziva had been listening to him and watching his face, her expression open and trusting. She should have known after what had happened between them in Israel that Tony would not turn his back on her. But it was clear that there was some animosity toward her at her decision to leave and the last thing she wanted was to cause Tony problems in his work. And so despite her own desires, she yielded to the negative response and stayed put…for _Tony's sake._

Ziva felt his arms wrap around her in a comforting hug and she finally released her tears. She did not know what this all meant but in her heart she knew that she and Tony were in a good place and if that was all it should ever be, she would be content.

Tony closed his eyes and held onto Ziva as tightly as he could. _This changed everything_. It changed not only his thoughts about his own possible future, one that may or may not include Ziva; but it also changed his perspective about the _job_. Someone close to him could not be trusted and his previous thoughts of leading the team began to coalesce into the idea of _leaving_ the team.

Tony's mind was in turmoil, his head spinning by the implications of what he had just heard. When he had made his original plans to visit Ziva in Tel Aviv, he had gone with the idea of discussing the prospect of the two of them having a romantic relationship as opposed to one that was strictly professional with a side of personal. The subsequent events and his four month search for her had strengthened his determination to keep her in his life, somehow. Failure had not been anticipated, and Tony was left without a Plan B.

What if Ziva _had_ returned last year as she had intended? She knew his heart, and he knew hers. Would they have embarked on a journey of discovery and more important, would it have succeeded? Tony did not have a crystal ball or the gift of foresight. But he knew from experience that he was responsible for making the changes he needed to ensure that his life was happy and meaningful. Two years ago he thought he knew what he needed to do to make that happen. Was he getting a second chance?

Tony pulled back and stroked her cheek absently. Her tears had stopped, and she had composed herself somewhat. He searched her face, hoping to see the hurt gone; the creases of despair erased. "We will be ok, Tony." She murmured softly, trying to reassure him that she did not place blame and that she did not want him to pursue the matter.

Tony considered her words and their import. He agreed fervently that he and Ziva would indeed be ok, and he also knew he would not let this go. But _today_ would not be the day that he would fight that battle. Today would be _Day One_.

"Ziva, I can't take away the hurtful things that were said and the betrayal you felt at those words. All I can do is suggest that we start fresh, take things from this moment. We can deal with the past, but I would really like to explore the future, of that's ok with you." Tony watched her carefully to gauge her reaction and felt a strong sense of relief that at least she didn't grab her purse and run for the hills. _Progress_.

Ziva looked into Tony's eyes, aware that this was a defining moment in their relationship. How she responded could set the stage for their future, whatever that future may end up being. She smiled at him, pleased to see the set of his jaw relax as he returned the smile. "I know a lot can change with the passing of time. Memories fade and wishes dry up and float away. But the heart…the heart always knows. My heart knows, Tony. My reason for not returning with you was the fault of timing, not the lack of caring. It was the wrong time then. It would seem it was the wrong time last April." Ziva paused and bit her lip.

"Is it the right time now? I do not know the answer to that. When I decided to fly back after Gibbs was shot, I was aware that you would be here as well. But I came with no expectations. I never expected you to wait for me; it was burden I could not bear. All I can tell you is that I have spent this time making myself a better person. I have spent my time on me, alone. There is no other."

Tony realized that Ziva was telling him that she had essentially been true to him, even if that may have not been her actual intention. His slight grimace that he had not himself been so noble was not missed by Ziva. She sighed and shook her head sadly.

"Tony, I know you, and I know what you need... And that is not to be alone. I assumed that was the reason I was told to stay away. I did not ask, nor did I expect you to wait for me at a time I did not think myself worthy of such actions." Tony closed his eyes at Ziva's word of self-denial. Gently, he took her hand and kissed her fingers, reminiscent of their moment in the orchard. Just as she had then, she sucked in her breath in surprise and gave him her full attention.

"I can't lie to you and say that I didn't try to move on with my life. But it wasn't until about six months ago, not last year. And it didn't last. Someday I'll tell you all about it…maybe." Tony took a deep breath as he began what he hoped would be a new beginning for them. "Ziva, I don't ever want to forget our past. It's who we are, and it brought us to where we are today. It wasn't always easy, but it was ours and we need to remember it and embrace it. But…"

Tony smiled softly as he took her other hand. "I want the opportunity to make new memories. I treasure Ziva David, Mossad Officer, NCIS Agent and my best friend. I told you this before: contents priceless. Now I want to get to know… _Just Ziva David_."

Ziva's eyes widened at Tony's use of her self-proclaimed identity and understood exactly what he was saying. Her gaze softened and she squeezed his hands in response, not trusting her voice.

"What did you have in mind?" She asked in a slightly tremulous voice, trying to calm her own nerves and the pounding of her heart. Just as Tony opened his mouth to answer, his cell phone rang, causing them both to jump apart in surprise.

They looked at each other sheepishly; not yet quite comfortable with their declarations but at least they were finally on the same page. Tony held up his finger as a non-verbal _"hold that thought"_ as he answered the unwelcome interruption.

"Yeah, DiNozzo." He responded curtly, hoping the interloper would get the message to make this short and to the point.

"How are you doing Agent DiNozzo? Are you holding vigil at Agent Gibbs' bedside? It's a shame that he did not die immediately of his wounds as suffering is so… _unnecessary_ in my opinion." Daniel Budd's voice sounded sympathetic and sad, but Tony knew it was an act of intimidation, not conciliation.

Tony sucked in his breath, glancing at Ziva in alarm but quickly composing himself. "That's strange, since you seem to delight in making people suffer, Budd. Tell me, how are the kids? I'll just bet you're one big happy family, aren't you. Father's Day is coming up next month you know." Ziva's eyes widened as she recognized the name Tony had mentioned briefly as the person responsible for Gibbs' present condition. Tony had a sudden thought that Daniel Budd may have followed him and Gibbs back to the US, and the frightening possibility that he could be watching him and Ziva this very moment.

Ziva did not miss the way Tony's eyes darted around, taking in their surroundings, and she immediately tensed in response. Although her life the past year or so had not been without its dangers, they were not directed at her personally. She had forgotten what it was like to be targeted and she found the sensation unwelcome.

Tony immediately noticed the change in her demeanor and put his arm around her shoulder and drew her close to him, as if shielding her from harm. As fruitless as the gesture would have been in an actual assault, Ziva appreciated it nonetheless and leaned into his embrace.

Tony frowned at Budd's chuckle in response. "The children are doing very well, happy and thriving and I am sure they would thank you for your concern. However, I am concerned about you. What will you do now that Agent Gibbs is no longer able to lead you? Who will you turn to, who will tell you what to do?" Tony recognized baiting when he heard it, and this was being delivered by a master manipulator. But he had no intention of feeding into Budd's egomania and tamped down his rising anger.

"Well, you seem to know me so well, don't you? Then you should also know that when Gibbs is down, _I_ am the one to deal with. And you can bet your ass that you will be dealing with me, Budd. Wherever you are, I will find you; and I will stop you." Tony glanced at Ziva and was emboldened by her expression of pride in his words. He smiled grimly and nodded his head, realizing he was ready to get back into the game.

"Make no mistake, you will be stopped and there is nothing any of those kids will be able to do to help you. And in the end, they will reject you and see you for what you really are: a monster. You're a monster and a coward who preys on innocent children and has to rely on them to do his dirty work. Your own parents would be so proud." Tony ended the call before Budd could respond.

Tony went over to the bench, sat down heavily and leaned his head back in frustration. Ziva immediately went to his side, watching him carefully. After a few moments, he turned his face and regarded her with worried eyes. She smiled knowingly and touched his cheek. "It is time to go back to work, yes?"

Tony nodded slightly, but then shook his head. "I need to report this to Vance, but I don't need to go in to do that." Ziva nodded as he walked away and made the necessary call to the Director. She tried to not listen, as she was no longer interested in international intrigue and terrorists…

Ziva frowned as she considered how she was going to stay away from the "job" that was no longer hers. Just by being here and being around Tony she would by association be aware of some of the actions that were being taken, security issues notwithstanding. She understood the process and knew by experience what would be done and how things would be handled. Her reasons for coming had been to see Gibbs with her own eyes that he was still alive…and to make sure Tony was handling things. She didn't think that her presence may send a signal that she wanted back into the game, and Tony hadn't even suggested that he thought that was even a possibility.

Ziva gave herself a mental head slap worthy of Gibbs. It was silly to start stressing over possibilities that had little likelihood of coming to fruition. But she did start to think who she would inform that she was back in DC, and who she would _not_ …

She looked up as Tony returned to her side, pocketing his phone as he was walking. "Ok, Vance is aware of the situation and he's going to have McGee do that phone ping thing to see if they can home in on a location for Budd. It _would_ be nice to know if he is our neck of the woods." Tony smiled, but Ziva knew the words were not spoken in humor. Despite his exterior calm, she had no doubt that Tony was shaken and troubled by this unexpected and unwelcome call.

"You do not need to go back to the Navy Yard?" Ziva was relieved but surprised that Tony wasn't racing to his car to get back. Tony shook his head, his smile widening and more genuine.

Tony knew he had to put aside his own personal feelings regarding the team, and do his job. And wasn't that something he had always exceled at, putting the job ahead of himself? But just for one brief moment, he was not going to yield.

"Nothing I can do that McGee can't do. If it turns out Budd is around the corner that will be another story. Tomorrow will be time to get down to business and face reality, but tonight?" He turned slightly so that he was facing Ziva, taking her hand in his.

"Tonight, the world doesn't exist. Tonight, there are no bad guys. Tonight…it's just you and me. Ok?" He searched her face for any sign that she disagreed with his decision to leave the work for one more day. Instead, he saw relief and acceptance.

"You are suggesting that we try to be like…normal people?" Her question was genuine and asked with some skeptical amusement, but it gave Tony a moment to consider his proposition. That was _exactly_ what he was suggesting; that they forget the hurts and horrors of the past and proceed about their lives like accountants and teachers and dental assistants. On second thought, scratch the dental assistants, some of the things they saw must give them the heebie jeebies.

But he understood her skepticism, what her question really meant. "Do you think that's impossible? That we are doomed to always be our jobs and not our true selves?"

Ziva shook her head thoughtfully. "No, I do not believe that; even when your job _is_ your life. There is always some remnant of your humanity that is waiting to be liberated."

Tony himself felt liberated in that moment, in a way he had never felt before. "That's exactly what I _don't_ want, Ziva; for the job to be my life. I am dedicated and damn good at what I do. But I need to know that it's all worth it, that there is a reason to for all of this craziness, you know? Otherwise, what's the point?"

 **NCIS- Navy Yard Washington, DC**

Bishop looked up as McGee exited the elevator. Her perpetual frown deepened as she regarded her team member. She had been slightly offended that he had just taken off without explanation, leaving her alone to do…

The woman sighed as she realized they weren't doing anything that she considered important and wondered for the hundredth time why she had been so excited to leave the NSA to join this unpredictable team.

"McGee!" Before she could get a word in edgewise, Vance called down from the mezzanine, taking the stairs as he barked orders. Bishop looked confused as the Director relayed the message he had received from Tony regarding the contact from Daniel Budd. She whipped her head around and stared at the elevator doors. "Isn't Tony coming back in?" McGee looked up momentarily from his work station, already hard at work at the new assignment given him. He shrugged and continued typing at lightning speed.

"I think he may have some other things he needs to do." He responded automatically, thinking if that was indeed Ziva he saw in the car with DiNozzo that there would be some unfinished business that needed to be attended to.

McGee didn't really care about what did or didn't happen between Tony and Ziva, except however the fallout affected him. But with Ziva possibly back in the picture he couldn't help but wonder if once again the team dynamic would be changing, along with some personnel.

 **And there you go. Ziva was coming back to be with Tony. But you knew that didn't you? For those of you familiar with my writing, I do not like procedurals, so very little action will take place in this story other than what will be required to move the story along. This is, first and foremost, a TIVA story. I am sure however, that the premiere will be split between two story lines: Gibbs and will he/won't he die; and DiNozzo immediately taking the bull by the horns and going after Budd. There will be no days off and I am fairly positive Ziva will not even be mentioned, much less in the room. Thank again for your reviews, likes and follows, they really keep me going.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks again for the wonderful reviews and support. I haven't had much time to write so this chapter will be quite a bit shorter than the others but I wanted to get something out. This is all mostly Tony/Ziva fluff-n-stuff, because that is the easiest for me to write.**

 **Usual Disclaimers- I don't own 'em, wish I did.**

" _ **McGee!" Before she could get a word in edgewise, Vance called down from the mezzanine, taking the stairs as he barked orders. Bishop looked confused as the Director relayed the message he had received from Tony regarding the contact from Daniel Budd. She whipped her head around and stared at the elevator doors. "Isn't Tony coming back in?" McGee looked up momentarily from his work station, already hard at work at the new assignment given him. He shrugged and continued typing at lightning speed.**_

" _ **I think he may have some other things he needs to do." He responded automatically, thinking if that was indeed Ziva he saw in the car with DiNozzo that there would be some unfinished business that needed to be attended to.**_

 _ **McGee didn't really care about what did or didn't happen between Tony and Ziva, except however the fallout affected him. But with Ziva possibly back in the picture he couldn't help but wonder if once again the team dynamic would be changing, along with some personnel.**_

 **Bobby Van's Grill- Washington, DC**

"And so, after a few months I decided to move closer to the conflict. I assisted at some refugee camps just a few kilometers from the Gaza Strip." Ziva rubbed the rim of her wine glass as she continued her story post-NCIS to her dinner companion. Tony winced slightly, unable to hide his concern for her safety. The fact that she was sitting across from him very much alive had no bearing on the knee-jerk reaction. Ziva chuckled softly at his expression but smiled in appreciation for his concern.

"It was not without its dangers, I must admit. In fact I narrowly missed serious injury when insurgents strafed the camp, thinking we were harboring military forces." Tony almost sputtered his wine at this revelation. He wiped at his mouth to catch the dribbles and eyed her warily.

"I hope when you say you missed serious injury that you missed injury entirely." He didn't like to think of Ziva defenseless in such a hostile environment. Her decision to let go of the badge also meant that she had to let go of the weapons, other than the formidable weapon that _was_ Ziva David. She had impressed upon him her desire that her experience and expertise not be advertised and she was very careful to keep her past hidden. That meant she had to depend upon others of less experience and skill for her safety. Tony wondered how she stilled her reflexive response in an adversarial situation, but then considered that perhaps she had not been close up and personal with the people who would instigate such a response. She did say she had mostly been with women and children…

"This is a very nice place, Tony." Ziva smoothly changed the subject as she looked around the elegant room. Its dark wood and warm ambiance was in sharp contrast to her previous surroundings and she found it to be oddly comforting for her, most likely because it reminded her of Tony. He didn't miss that she never answered his question regarding injuries and that gave his pause but he decided not to pursue it for the moment. He looked around as well, smiling and nodding in agreement with Ziva's assessment.

"It's my favorite restaurant. I took my Dad here…" Tony looked upward as he tried to remember exactly when it was, as there were few times when his father showed up that he was happy to share a meal with him. He finally gave up trying to recall the exact moment of the unusual occurrence and shrugged. "I don't know…one of the times he showed up unannounced. I thought it would appeal to his sensibilities, and mine I guess. And you know I love a good steak." Tony punctuated his remark by taking a bite of the object of his affections. Ziva rolled her eyes in mock exasperation, but took his remark about his father to further steer the conversation from her for the moment.

"How is your father? You have not spoken of him until this moment. Is he well? Is he staying out of trouble?" Ziva's eyes sparkled in anticipation of a passionate dissertation regarding Senior's latest escapades and she wasn't disappointed. Tony was alternately amused and annoyed by whatever his father had been doing for the past eighteen months that Ziva had not been present to witness. Ziva did not have a blind eye to the man that was Anthony DiNozzo, Sr. When he was around, she was always happy to see him and acted kindly toward him for Tony's benefit.

But beneath her pleased expression was a wariness and dismay at the man who so demoralized her partner every time he showed up. Tony had always played up his horrible childhood and it was easy to assume that he was just seeking attention and making up the stories that he relayed of his unconventional childhood. Ziva knew better. Yes, Tony did exaggerate somewhat…he finally admitted to her that his mother had _not_ actually drank his sea monkeys. But the loss and abandonment issues were real and time did not necessarily heal old wounds.

She leaned on her hand and watched Tony as he described his father's unexpected announcement of moving closer and trying to have a real relationship with his son. She still sensed the underlying hurt and loss that was always present, and almost impossible to hide. But there was something new in his demeanor as he discussed his wayward parent. A feeling of acceptance maybe, or perhaps it was just the knowledge that he would never have control over his father's actions and he had finally stopped trying. Whatever it was, Ziva could see that Tony had found his balance with Anthony DiNozzo, Sr. and it made her very happy.

Tony looked at Ziva, noting the relaxed posture and soft expression of contentment on her face and silently proclaimed the evening a success thus far. Although they had certainly been "out" together before, sharing meals or drinks, it had not been with a purpose other than to eat or drink. There was no conscious decision to be _together_ , it had been convenient or necessary due to work and time constraints. That is not to say those other moments had not been pleasurable even if that goal had not been the primary purpose.

The first real time they had purposely spent private time together had been that summer when Gibbs had retired to Mexico. Tony had taken the opportunity of Gibbs' absence, and the absence of his rules, to become better acquainted with his Liaison Officer, to actually get to _know_ her if that was at all possible.

Tony found the Ziva at work and the Ziva at home to be vastly different and he had a difficult time choosing which her preferred as he was intrigued by both versions. But she was still guarded and resistant to becoming too close. Tony understood by what she _wasn't_ saying that it was because of her father and the fact that she could be recalled at any given moment. Why start something that you couldn't see through?

Tony had agreed with the sentiment, although they did engage in some extracurricular activity as he liked to call it. It was quite enjoyable and Tony would have enjoyed it even more if it had continued, but Gibbs had returned and grabbed the reins of the team from his grasp and all was back to the way it had been.

Life and people got in the way but by that last year of working together they had been inching closer toward each other, not always with purpose or intent, but closer nonetheless. And then Bodnar showed up, and life as they knew it ended with a finality that was unfathomable.

"What is that look on your face?" Tony glanced up in surprise to find Ziva regarding him closely. He silently cursed his brain for wandering and hoped he hadn't put a damper on the evening by those intruding memories. He shrugged and smiled as he took her hand.

"I was just assaulted by some random thoughts that decided to show up and mess with my head. All is well in DiNozzo land." Ziva looked more dubious than relieved.

"Now I am _really_ worried." She quipped lightly, her tone of voice indicating that she was only half joking. Tony squeezed her hand and shook his head.

"No, I'm good. In fact I am so good I am going to dazzle you with my fancy footwork." At that, Tony stood and held out his other hand. Ziva looked at it in surprise and then allowed her eyes to travel up to meet his. The hazel green irises that stared back made her heart skip a beat. Those eyes had always been a weak spot for her and time had not diminished their effect. Her own eyes never leaving his, she took the offered hand and allowed him to lead her to the dance floor.

The music was slow and smoky, just the right tempo and timbre for the fledgling couple. They watched each other's faces as they swayed slowly to the music, not quite aware that with each step they moved closer together until they were almost melded as one.

"This is nice." Tony murmured into her soft curls. Ziva laid her head on his shoulder, smiling into his chest.

"It is. It is _very_ nice." In fact, the whole evening was a revelation for Ziva. Having never been on a "real official date" with Tony before, she didn't really know what to expect. Her first surprise was when he announced he had to go somewhere once he had gotten dressed in his impeccable suit that had Ziva swooning from the first moment she laid eyes on him. Approximately thirty seconds after Tony left the apartment there was a knock on the door. Ziva hesitantly walked over and peered through the peep hole. What she saw was a grinning Tony.

She pulled open the door in confusion. "Did you forget something?" She asked, wondering what in the world he was doing. Tony just continued smiling and then he surprised her by bringing out a single long-stem rose from behind his back.

"Nope, I'm just here to pick up my date for the evening." Ziva gasped in surprise, at both the flower and Tony's actions and from that moment he had set the tone for the remainder of the evening. She always knew that he was a gentleman and she had imagined that he would be a most attentive date. She was not disappointed.

Ziva silently thanked herself for thinking to buy at least one nice dress during her shopping spree. The Escada V-neck sheath she wore was simple, a classic black with silver thread shot through the material. It was slightly clingy but not a bandage that didn't allow her to breath. It was sexy without being slutty and Ziva fell in love with it the moment she saw it. The way Tony was gently running his hand up and down her back told her that he loved it as well.

"Have I told you yet how beautiful you look?" Tony's question made her pull back and look at his face, her eyes traveling to his mouth before looking into his warm eyes. She smiled softly; surprised at the slight flush that began to creep up from her neck to her cheeks.

"Your eyes did when you first saw me come out of the bedroom. Your actions have told me as you gave me that beautiful rose, and held the door for me, and as you hold me in your arms this moment." Ziva was sure she was looking at Tony with pure adoration but didn't really care. This was what they were doing, yes? Acting on their feelings, exploring them and willing to accept the consequences? By accepting that, she knew the consequences could also end up being that they decided to _not_ pursue a relationship, but Ziva was not ready to go there just yet. For once, she enjoyed the moment instead of worrying about the future.

Tony smiled at Ziva's words, loving the way her eyes looked at him with that dreamy way that always made him go weak at the knees. He brought his hand up to her cheek and caressed it softly with his thumb. "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen." Tony's voice was deep with his sincerity, what he jokingly called his "grown-up voice", and Ziva caught her breath at his admission. She sighed contentedly and laid her head back on his shoulder as they continued their dance, Tony drawing her even closer.

When the music finally ended, they were reluctant to pull apart. Holding her hand firmly in his, Tony led them back to their table, never taking his eyes off of her. He began to think how this evening might end and he was surprised at how conflicted he was. On the one hand, he wanted nothing more than to take this luminous woman to his bed and love her the way he had always dreamed of.

But a small part of his brain was screaming to take it slow. Yes, they already knew each other so well that in essence and reality they were _years_ beyond first date. But theirs was a complex and unusual history that defied logic and accepted dating practices. Tony was also acutely aware that he didn't want this to resemble in any way his dating habits in the past, in which he hit on a beautiful woman, took her out for a spectacular evening of dinner and dancing and then took her home to seal the deal, probably to never see her again.

Tony didn't given himself credit in that he hadn't practice that form of dating for years, but it worried him that Ziva would not necessarily know that and the knowledge that she was well aware of his previous accepted ritual of bagging a babe, due to his annoying habit of discussing his exploits ad nauseum.

But it was the protective part of his brain that was really holding him back. Ziva had not said, after all, that she was here to stay. She was certainly interested and willing to explore the possibility but what if after all was said and done she decided that she wanted to go back to Israel? Where would Tony be then?

Tony mentally slapped the back of his head and silently berated himself for allowing negative thoughts to put a damper on this wonderful evening. He decided he wouldn't deal with it until it came up. For all he knew, Ziva felt the same way as he did. Yep, that's what he would do; pretend it was not something to worry about. He would rely on the usual DiNozzo deflection and avoidance routine that had served him so poorly these past years.

A bit later as they were ascending in the elevator to his apartment, Tony's anxiety started to rise with the car. Ziva could feel the slight tension in his stance and knew at once what was going through his mind. Truth be told, she had the same thoughts as to how they would proceed with this dating thing, and how things would progress if that should be the end result.

Ziva loved Tony; there was no denying it to herself or to him. And Tony had admitted the same to her, albeit eighteen months ago. But there were many different levels of love and she was not sure they were both at the same one. She knew it would probably not be in their best interest to take things further until they were both comfortable being in each other's company again, although if tonight was any indication, it would not be too much longer in the future. Before the car reached the desired destination, Tony pulled the stop. Ziva raised an eyebrow in question, not too concerned but extremely curious, wondering if he had been thinking the same thing.

Tony hesitated for a second before speaking. "I know how dates usually end and I don't want this to be awkward for us, so if it's ok I'd really like to kiss you now." Tony watched Ziva's face for any sign that she thought he was being a total dweeb about the whole thing. Instead he saw agreement and a slight relief that indicated she was just as nervous as he was about how to act. He smiled softly as he closed the gap between and taking her face in his hands, kissed her gently and tenderly. The kiss deepened but remained relatively chaste. Tony sighed in satisfaction and could feel the same release in Ziva. He pulled back, moving his hands to her waist and drawing her closer.

"That worked really well for me." Ziva burst out laughing at his pronouncement. Tony rolled his eyes, and smiled sheepishly. Ziva patted his chest, still chuckling in amusement. Still grinning, he pushed in the stop and continued to gaze at her as the car made its final ascent. He threaded his fingers through hers and led her back to his apartment, never taking his eyes off of her as he navigated the hallway by memory rather than by sight.

He almost tripped over his feet when Ziva suddenly halted. He looked at her quizzically and then followed her shocked gaze in the direction she was looking. His own mouth dropped open slightly as he watched the figure that had been seated by his door slowly rise up to a standing position.

"I knew it was you…I knew my eyes weren't playing tricks on me." Timothy McGee had trouble concealing how emotional he felt at the reunion that had been too long in the making.

"Welcome home, Ziva."

 **Bobby Van's Grill is a real place in DC and just as I described except it doesn't have a dance floor- poetic license. Hope you enjoy this little installment. Please leave reviews, they make my day.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry for the delay, have been very busy and frankly I had a lot of trouble with this chapter. There is some procedural stuff in here, which I really don't have much talent for writing and ended up deleting a lot of it. If it all sounds completely stupid and implausible that's because it is. I also didn't watch every episode in this finale arc so I am sure I missed some vital facts of the story line.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own 'em.**

" _ **That worked really well for me." Ziva burst out laughing at his pronouncement. Tony rolled his eyes, and smiled sheepishly. Ziva patted his chest, still chuckling in amusement. Still grinning, he pushed in the stop and continued to gaze at her as the car made its final ascent. He threaded his fingers through hers and led her back to his apartment, never taking his eyes off of her as he navigated the hallway by memory rather than by sight.**_

 _ **He almost tripped over his feet when Ziva suddenly halted. He looked at her quizzically and then followed her shocked gaze in the direction she was looking. His own mouth dropped open slightly as he watched the figure that had been seated by his door slowly rise up to a standing position.**_

" _ **I knew it was you…I knew my eyes weren't playing tricks on me." Timothy McGee had trouble concealing how emotional he felt at the reunion that had been too long in the making.**_

" _ **Welcome home, Ziva."**_

"Lost and Found" – Chapter Nine

Tony eyed McGee with an expression of incredulity, mixed with a healthy dose of concern for Ziva, but also tinged with a slight sensation of relief as the answer to the question regarding how he and Ziva were going to deal with the "end of the date" scenario was abruptly negated.

"What were you thinking?" Tony asked his colleague as Tim wolfed down the sandwich Tony had somehow managed to put together for him. He silently thanked Ziva for thinking to buy food in the first place. Otherwise he would have been hard-pressed to find sustenance for the agent who probably hadn't eaten since yesterday.

"Huh?" McGee had the grace to swallow his food before he opened his mouth, but Tony's eye roll told him his response was unacceptable. Tim took a long gulp of his beer and eyed Tony speculatively. "Why are you so dressed up?" He finally noticed Tony's impeccable suit and tie, of a higher quality than what he usually wore at work.

Tony stared down McGee, completely exasperated with his lack of guile. "We were out to dinner, McOblivious. What if we hadn't come back for hours? Were you going to wait all night on my doorstep?" Tim chewed thoughtfully as he considered Tony's response. He shrugged, his hunger short circuiting his brain for the moment.

"Still doesn't explain the suit. You don't need to dress up for dinner with us."

Tony watched McGee's face to see if he was joking or not, and he realized with a sudden pang in his chest that Tim still thought of Ziva as a part of the team. Therefore it made perfect sense to think of Tony and Ziva getting something to eat as being for the sole purpose of _getting something to eat._

Truth be told, Tony still considered Ziva to be a part of the team, and he firmly believed that he would never think otherwise. What had changed, from Tony's perspective, was that Ziva was now a part of _Team DiNozzo_ and not Team Gibbs. That and the idea of her position on his team were hopefully evolving into a different role, so to speak.

Tony didn't think he had the right to claim Ziva as his own just _yet_ ; but he felt McGee needed a dose of reality. He mused how ironic that McGee should show up, only hours after Tony had spoken to Ziva on the way to dinner about how, or _if_ , she wanted to let the others know of her presence in DC.

" _Why are you doing that thing with your fingers on the steering wheel?" Ziva's voice brought Tony out of his reverie. He had been thinking of something he wanted to broach with Ziva but wasn't sure how to start the conversation. The drumming of his fingers was an unconscious response to his nervousness about discussing the issue with the beautiful woman seated next to him._

 _So much for stealth._

 _Tony smiled sheepishly and then took a deep breath. "I was just wondering how you want to let the others know you are back." Tony faltered when he saw Ziva tense up slightly and look out the car window. "Or maybe you don't want anyone to know. It's up to you, but…"_

 _Ziva turned back to Tony, her expression resigned but the tension was still evident on her face. Tony smiled softly at her and took the opportunity to grasp her hand lightly since they were stopped for a red light. "Look, I just think there is a high probability of accidently running into someone at the hospital, you know? Is that how you want to see them the first time, or even the way you want them to find out you're here?" Tony's tone of voice indicated to Ziva that he thought the scenario would not be a good one, and Ziva reluctantly agreed. If anyone should find out she was back, it would have to be on her terms and at her discretion._

" _Of'course, you are right Tony. I had not thought of that. I had not thought of anything at this point beyond getting here…and seeing you and Gibbs." She bit her lip as she considered her options. "The others will eventually find out I am here I suppose." She turned slightly toward Tony, offering him a guilty smile._

" _Maybe you should say something, yes? It might be better coming from you." Tony frowned slightly at Ziva's nervousness and thought again of the offensive response that caused her to abort her return a year ago._

 _Tony nodded, keeping his thoughts to himself. "Who do you want me to tell? I'll make sure they are discreet and don't start blabbing all over the Navy Yard that Ziva David has returned."  
Ziva chuckled at Tony's attempt to lighten the mood. She was grateful that he understood her reticence and more importantly, was willing to take the flack should there be any fallout._

" _McGee." Ziva answered firmly. "And Director Vance, I think." At Tony's raised eyebrow, Ziva continued, looking sad but resolute. "We have a shared bond, yes? I believe I owe him this courtesy." Tony nodded slowly; pained at the reminder of the horrific event that had occurred two years ago that had changed all of their lives forever._

" _I'll speak to McGee in the morning when I get in to work. He won't say anything, Ziva." He squeezed her hand slightly and then resumed driving as the light turned green. He didn't comment on her choices but he understood at once that neither McGee nor Vance had been the ones to speak to Ziva last year. He would have considered taking them off of his personal shit list, but to be honest, their names had not been enumerated on the list in the first place. Tony had his own ideas about who the possible culprit was, and as far as he was concerned it was neither of the two men just named._

Tony returned his thoughts to the present as he realized that McGee was still waiting for him to respond to his remark. He switched tactics by turning the questions back on to McGee. "How did you know Ziva was back in the first place, Tim? I was going to tell you tomorrow by the way, but you have an annoying habit of not wanting to wait for things." McGee winced slightly, finally for the first time realizing he may have interrupted something. But his brain refused to go there for the moment.

"I went to see Gibbs earlier today. I don't know, I had this idea that I thought might help him get better." Tim looked away for a moment, and then returned his gaze to his beer. "I had just left my car and was heading down the stairs when I saw you drive by. I wasn't sure, I mean I didn't really get a good look at her; but it sure _looked_ like Ziva. I had to know, Tony." McGee looked somewhat uncomfortable and embarrassed by his admission and Tony decided to cut him some slack.

"You could have just called me, Tim. You didn't have to come here in the middle of the night for God's sake." This time Tim rolled his eyes.

"It's eleven o'clock Tony, hardly the middle of the night. And I _did_ think about calling, but I figured you would think I was calling to check up on you and you wouldn't answer." McGee shrugged again. "It seemed like a good idea at the time." He looked back at Tony, his face intense and his eyes belying his emotions. "I really needed to see her, Tony. You know?"

Tony's expression relaxed at McGee's admission. He _did_ know…he felt the same way and he wondered if Tim was upset that Ziva hadn't come to him instead. Of'course, Tim was not fully aware of what had happened in Israel so as far as he was concerned, Tony wasn't any more important than McGee was in Ziva's eyes.

Tony leaned forward and placed his hands on his kitchen island. "Ok, here's the deal: Ziva found out Gibbs got shot. I'm not going into the details of the how and whys, just take it as it is. She immediately got on a flight to DC, to see Gibbs with her own eyes; you know, in case…" Tony trailed off and shifted his eyes to a random spot on the wall.

"She got in last night. She showed up on my doorstep and I took her to see Gibbs at the hospital earlier today. I guess that's when you saw us." Tim eyed Tony curiously, realizing quite a bit had been left out of his narrative between last night and this moment. Understanding dawned in his eyes and he had the grace to look contrite.

"Oh God Tony, I never even thought about Ziva being with you and Ziva being… _with you_." He had the grace to look mortified that he may have interrupted something and Tony had to chuckle at his expense.

"It's all good, McCoitusinterruptus. We aren't there right now. We were a while back, but…look, just suffice it to say that Ziva and I have a history you don't know about, and to be honest you still don't need to know about it." Tony peered around the corner to see if Ziva was within earshot. He lowered his voice just in case, causing McGee to lean in closer to hear his words.

"At this point, I'm not sure she's back for good. I don't think _she_ even knows what she is doing right now." He took a deep breath and decided to include McGee into the alliance. "But she did tell me that she had decided to come back last year, Tim. She was informed by someone, _someone on our team_ , that she was not welcome and to stay away." The look of shock on McGee's face lightened Tony's mood. He knew they would have a strong ally and staunch supporter in McGee. He held up his hand before McGee could begin to sputter the same words and thoughts Tony had earlier in the day.

"I don't know who did it yet, but I will. But that's not important right now. Look, Ziva doesn't want everyone to know she's back at the moment. I was going to tell you and Vance tomorrow, but that was it. You need to keep this between us, McGee. You got that?" McGee didn't even look surprised at Vance's name being mentioned, but he did frown at some of the exclusions.

"Why not tell Abby, or Jimmy for that matter? Well, I guess Jimmy would be so excited he would blab it all over the Navy Yard." McGee chewed on his lower lip thoughtfully as Tony smirked at him having the same thought as he had in the car earlier in the evening.

"So why not tell Abby? Does Ziva think Abby wouldn't be happy she is back; why would she think that?" McGee looked troubled at her exclusion. Tony just shrugged, clearly unconcerned over Abby's feelings on the matter.

"I didn't ask and I'm not going to. And neither are you, McGee. One thing that is crystal clear to me is that if this is going to work, it has to be on Ziva's terms. Don't you dare say anything to her, or anyone, until Ziva stamps it with her seal of approval." Tony listened for a moment again to see if Ziva was approaching.

"One other thing: Please do _not_ say anything to Ziva that sounds in any way as if you expect her to come back to NCIS or that you are upset she is not coming back to the team. She made her decision two years ago and it is not changing. I don't need her running back to Israel because she is feeling pressure from you or anyone else to come back to this kind of work. _Promise me, Tim_." Tony held his gaze, his resolve unwavering.

McGee looked at Tony's tense posture and realized how important this was to him for Ziva to not be questioned regarding her intentions in being back. He was surprised at how worried Tony was that she would just take off at the slightest suggestion of her coming back to work, but then again he never got the full story on why she left in the first place. The look on Tony's face was enough for him to agree to his, and Ziva's terms.

McGee looked quickly over his shoulder. "In that case, I better fill you in on what I have been able to find so far regarding your call from Daniel Budd." Tony sucked in his breath and went over to stand beside McGee so they could speak more privately.

"Director Vance asked me to try to locate his signal after you called him. The guy is good, I'll give him that. I could see his signal was being bounced all over the place using GPS and E911's. I couldn't get any particular VPN number as he is clearly using a burn phone but I've been able to narrow down the brand and where it may have been purchased: Beirut, Riyadh, Cairo, Kurdistan and…." Tony looked at McGee as he stopped mid-sentence. McGee looked like he didn't want to continue, causing Tony's gut to churn.

"And where, McGee? Come on, spit it out!" Tony hissed under his breath still concerned Ziva might overhear their conversation.

McGee looked resigned. "Tel Aviv."

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda**

Franks stood at the foot of the bed, watching in amusement as Gibbs went through various routines and contortions all aimed at his still form. "Do you really think shouting or clapping your hands together is going to work, Probie? I think you're going to need something better than that to wake up. By the way; congratulations on making the decision to come back to the land of the living. I had my doubts for quite a while, thinking you kind of like being a voyeur and all."

Gibbs looked over at Franks and glared. "Do something, Mike! You must be good for something other than bothering the hell out of me!" Gibbs was breathing hard with his exertions and his monitors started beeping in protest.

Franks just looked at him passively, unmoved by his outburst. He rolled his eyes as the medical personnel swarmed over Gibb's body, trying to discover the cause of this latest alarm, the fourth in less than two hours.

"I think he may be waking up, his movements are more purposeful." The young resident announced as he checked Gibbs' reflexes. "He is responding appropriately to pain and his vital signs are improving. Let me page the fellow on call to see if they want to make any changes to his care." The young surgical resident placed his hand on Gibbs' shoulder. "You're doing great, Agent Gibbs. Just keep hanging on; you'll be awake before you know it."

Gibbs turned to Franks in triumph but his friend was no longer there. Gibbs rubbed the back of his neck, feeling a bit lost that his mentor was not there to help him. "I _have_ helped you, Probie." Gibbs could hear Mike's voice in his head. "I did what I needed to do, for now. Don't you fret; you can't get rid of me that easily." Gibbs smiled softly, dropping his shoulders in relief. As annoying as Mike could be, and had been; Gibbs was grateful for his company during this very strange and to be honest, frightening time.

Gibbs suddenly felt very tired, and the pain in his chest started to flair anew. Gasping slightly, he bowed to the inevitable and let himself be swallowed up into the miasma.

 **Tony's Apartment- Washington, DC**

Ziva looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror, touching her hair lightly, wiping away a smudge around her eye. Clucking her tongue, she freshened her make-up, dismayed at how messed up she thought she looked.

She didn't have much time to react to the shock of seeing McGee at Tony's door. He immediately engulfed her in a hug and started jabbering a mile a minute. Tony finally manhandled McGee off of Ziva to give her a chance to breathe and compose herself. She gave Tony a small look of thanks as he marched McGee into the kitchen, probably to get a beer and settle him down. She took advantage of their absence to steal away to the sanctuary of the master bathroom to consider this new development. They had just discussed earlier in the evening of letting McGee know that she was back. How ironic that he should show up like that.

Ziva decided she needed to change into something more casual and comfortable, as if being in more comfortable clothes would make her more comfortable with her visitor. She was surprised at the relief she felt that McGee knew she was back. She shook her head at her reticence in contacting the others, mildly chastising herself for being so concerned and realizing just how important their response to her return might be.

"It is not important if the others are happy or not." Ziva told her reflection in the mirror sternly. "The only thing that matters is that I am happy I am here. And I am VERY happy to be back!" Ziva stared at herself, somewhat surprised at her vehemence. She _was_ happy to be back and to see Tony. _And McGee_. She had no intentions of going back to work at NCIS, so if she never saw the others again, well it would be sad but it would be _their_ loss she finally decided.

Happy with her decision and finally at ease with her unexpected visitor, she gave her hair a quick brush and returned the kitchen where Tony and McGee were now close together and whispering.

She paused uncertainly at the entrance, unsure if she was interrupting something important. Tony glanced up when he sensed her presence. His wide smile instantly relaxed her. He held out his hand to beckon her to join the two men.

"I do not want to interrupt your conversation if it is about work." Ziva smiled hesitantly at McGee, wanting him to know that she was happy to see him but understood if they needed to speak of things she was not cleared for.

"It can wait." Tony and McGee spoke simultaneously. The three looked at each other and then laughed, breaking the spell. Ziva impulsively gave Tim a hug, catching him by surprise.

"I am very happy to see you again, McGee. It has been too long." Ziva smiled warmly at her former co-worker. Tim looked at Tony, who was gazing at Ziva with so much adoration it made him squirm somewhat.

"I'm really happy to see you too, Ziva. Sorry for the attack earlier. I was just excited that you are here." McGee shrugged, a bit embarrassed by his earlier exuberance. Ziva chuckled and patted his cheek.

"You surprised me, but it is fine McGee." Ziva looked at Tony, happy to see that he was not too disappointed at their aborted evening together. McGee made a big show of looking at his watch.

"Wow, look at the time! I should be going." Tony smirked at Tim's obvious attempt to let them be alone, but now that he was here, he wasn't anxious to have him leave just yet. There was a feeling of _home_ in the air; a feeling that Tony hadn't felt in a long time.

 _This is how it should be, the three of us together again_. Tony's sudden nostalgia hit him hard, but he reminded himself of his own words of caution to McGee, that Ziva was not here to come back to work at NCIS and to not pressure her in any way in that regard.

"Don't go yet." Tony blurted out, surprising both Ziva and Tim. "I mean, you didn't really get a chance to chat with Ziva. That is if Ziva is not too tired." That's right, lob it into Ziva's court and let her make the call. _Coward._

Ziva raised an eyebrow, noticing his sheepish grin. She shook her head at his backhanded way of getting out of things. "Yes McGee, unless you really need to leave, please do stay a bit longer. I would love to hear how you have been." At that, McGee started a long dissertation of his life and how Delilah was and…

Tony and Ziva looked at each other and smiled. Ziva realized how much she had missed being with her family, and felt a wave of emotion threatening to overcome her. Tony reached for her hand and pulled her closer, grounding her and wrapping her in a cocoon of warmth and love.

 _It was so good to be home_.

 **Thanks as always for your kind reviews and comments. Busy time for me right now, so the updates may not be as quick as I like. I am hoping to wrap this up before the premiere, which will in no way resemble this story unfortunately**. **Hope the procedural part didn't totally suck.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you so much for continuing to read this story. Some more procedural stuff, but just on the side. Not too much coming out about the premiere and unless they are the best secret keepers in the world, Cote has not been invited back. I believe her movie has just premiered in Chile and she is promoting it. Also MW just announced a very strange adaptation of "Little Women" for his new production company.**

" _ **Don't go yet." Tony blurted out, surprising both Ziva and Tim. "I mean, you didn't really get a chance to chat with Ziva. That is if Ziva is not too tired." That's right, lob it into Ziva's court and let her make the call. Coward.**_

 _ **Ziva raised an eyebrow, noticing his sheepish grin. She shook her head at his backhanded way of getting out of things. "Yes McGee, unless you really need to leave, please do stay a bit longer. I would love to hear how you have been." At that, McGee started a long dissertation of his life and how Delilah was and…**_

 _ **Tony and Ziva looked at each other and smiled. Ziva realized how much she had missed being with her family, and felt a wave of emotion threatening to overcome her. Tony reached for her hand and pulled her closer, grounding her and wrapping her in a cocoon of warmth and love.**_

 _ **It was so good to be home.**_

"Lost and Found"- Chapter Ten

Abby Sciuto was usually a very cheerful person. She made it her personal crusade to ensure that the people around her were happy, and if they weren't she did everything in her power to steer them in the right direction. She truly believed that her overwhelming personality and exuberance brought happiness and joy to all around her. She was perplexed therefore that Tony and Tim seemed to have come to some happy place that had not been at her instigation.

She noticed it right away: Tony seemed more relaxed and in control, in his expression, the tone of his voice; even his body language just screamed that he was in charge and he _liked_ it. Abby had always been a huge supporter of Anthony DiNozzo, Team Leader. When Gibbs had retired to Mexico, Abby had been devastated but had just as quickly turned around and jumped on the Tony bandwagon. She thought Tony was a wonderful leader and the only obstacle to his success was _Tony_.

But she also knew that he felt gaining leadership of a team due to extenuating circumstances as opposed to an actual promotion for his superior leadership skills left a very bad taste in his mouth. Tony was very much a status quo kind of guy. Don't upset the apple cart and all will be well. That's one reason why she believed that Tony had been so lost after Ziva left; the status quo had been changed and he had a real difficult time making the adjustment. But after her pep talk, she thought he had turned things around, and Tony had been perfectly happy being the number two guy on the team with McGee and Bishop, as long as Gibbs was number one and things kind of went back to normal in Abby's world.

But Tim; what was he so cheerful about? Abby had caught Tony and McGee whispering several times, but they always immediately went back to work when she approached or was in ear shot. Her eyes narrowed at the clandestine routine, wondering what they were hiding. Forgetting the whole "happy place" part of her confusion, a sudden, frightening thought came to her and that thought now brought her to the bullpen, standing in front of Tony and ringing her hands.

Tony had been back to work for two days before Abby made her unannounced visit. He had hit the ground running, immediately meeting with Vance and the other team leaders of the FBI and Homeland Security to discuss the targets that had been found on the video game McGee had played. Homeland was scrambling right now, going over the photos that were embedded. Something was being planned, something big. Tony had shuddered at the thought: Some of those photos had been of DC as well.

Local Leo's had also been recruited and security had been tightened around the monuments, the Mall and the metro. All military base commands had also been given the intelligence and searches were underway for hidden explosive devices. The Memorial Day holiday weekend was just around the corner, a mere week and a half away; and that thought was foremost in everyone's mind as the perfect scenario for a terrorist attack. It had everyone sweating and on edge.

Tony had then met with a smaller task force to plan the hunt for Daniel Budd. Vance had given him the lead and he brought the unit up to date with the latest information, and lack thereof, of the elusive leader of The Calling. After Gibbs had been shot, at first all Tony was interested in doing was to _stop the bleeding, stop the bleeding_ … and once Tony ensured he was in capable medical hands for stabilization, then, _and only then_ , did he and Officer Teague scour the area looking for Luke and Daniel Budd. They eventually found his hiding nest, with its unimpeded view of the market place and the events that unfolded. But of'course he was long gone and despite tearing the place apart there were no new clues to discover where he went and more importantly what his end game was, other than to inflict terror and allow the children to inherit the earth.

He had by necessity shared the information McGee had found regarding Budd's latest call to Tony, and by extension, he also told Vance that Ziva had returned to DC. Vance had sat up straight at his announcement and from his raised eyebrow Tony knew what was about to come out of his mouth. He held up his hand before Vance could get a word out and disabused him of any notion that Ziva was interested in returning to work for NCIS, or any one for that matter. He quickly explained how she had heard about Gibbs and felt she needed to be here.

Vance sat back in his chair and regarding his Team Leader closely and nodded. _"I understand completely, Agent DiNozzo. But just say the word and I can have her clearances back within an hour."_ Tony just looked impassively at his Director, worried that he may start to pressure Ziva to return. He didn't read him the riot act as he did McGee but he did stress Ziva's desire that her return not be common knowledge.

Vance looked very concerned at this caveat, but didn't inquire any further and agreed to her wishes. Once Tony got downstairs he felt a sense of relief that one more ally had been recruited but then Tim continued to discuss the importance and questions raised regarding the possible locations the burn phone could have been purchased and his sense of ease evaporated. The one place that had made Tony shudder was Tel Aviv but he tried to shake it off.

" _It's just a coincidence, McGee. There is nothing that ties this to Ziva, other than she has been in Israel. Until this there was nothing about Israel in our radar." McGee looked unsure but decided to agree with Tony's assessment._

" _You're right; it's just…weird, that's all. When you spoke to him, did he give anything away regarding these places?" Tim waited patiently as Tony mulled over the question._

" _Which time, in Iran or here?" Tony shrugged. "It doesn't really matter much I guess, since both times he was basically just trying to bait me." He got a faraway look in his eyes as he tried to recall his conversation with the elusive Budd right before Gibbs was shot. "He did say he had been reading up on me, which I found kind of strange at the time. Where would he even get information to read, unless he could hack into our system and read our files?" Tony looked worriedly at McGee. "You aren't aware of any security breaches are you?"_

 _Tim's eyes widened at Tony's suggestion. "No, Tony. Vance would have definitely said something if that had happened. I think that maybe whatever Budd knows about you is from one of those kids." Tony frowned and shook his head. It just didn't make sense to him. McGee continued his argument. "By reading about you would he have found out about Ziva?" His query brought Tony to the present._

 _Tony stared hard at McGee, as if blaming him for even considering such a thing as Ziva somehow being peripheral to this current situation. "I suppose it's possible, anything is possible. Ziva was a part of the team for eight years. He would know about you as well, McGee." Tim blanched at that reminder. Tony nodded as his point was made and continued._

" _Other than us getting involved initially with that first case, I can't think of how or why he would have even heard of NCIS, and certainly not us." Tony pursed his lips as he thought things through. "No, he found out about us through one of those kids, and has been studying his opponents. It's a game of chess, McGee. It all comes down to who's left with pieces on the board."_

" _We're already down by two." Tim reminded him, shaken by the analogy Tony had just presented. Tony jumped slightly at the reminder, his determination to get his hands on Budd strengthened._

" _At least you secured the Supreme Court Justices. That's a loss that has to sting." Tim nodded in agreement, grateful that they had reached the esteem body in time before the explosion had taken place._

" _But if the pictures from the video game are to be taken as fact, they already have their strategy mapped out and in place. We're talking worldwide terrorism, Tony. Not just something in our own backyard." Tim's gloom was a stark reminder of how little they really knew about Daniel Budd and his organization. This only deepened Tony's resolve. He placed his hand on McGee's shoulder to emphasize his next words._

" _They may have won this first battle, Tim; but they won't win the war. We'll find a way. We will, I can feel it, McGee. The missing piece of the puzzle that is Daniel Budd is within our grasp. We just have to find it."_

Tony now eyed Abby more out of curiosity than wariness. In the past few days, he had found little free time for visiting and as he had no new evidence to process, he didn't require himself down in the lab. Although he did have it on his future agenda to sit her down for a little chat, there were more pressing items that took precedence.

Tony looked at her tense posture, the anxiety coming off of her in waves. He looked sideways at McGee but he only shrugged and looked just as perplexed at the forensic scientist's demeanor. "Do you need something Abby?" Tony decided to cut to the chase rather than trying to guess what was going on in her brain. He frowned when he saw how agitated she was becoming.

"What I need Tony, is I need to know! You two…" She waved her finger back and forth between Tony and Tim. "…are hiding something! I can tell by the way you stop talking when I come around. It's driving me crazy, Tony! Just tell me…" Tony and McGee gulped and looked at each, both distressed and shocked that Abby may have found out that Ziva was back and no one told her.

Abby took a deep breath. "Is Gibbs worse? Is there something else wrong? You need to tell me because I can't take any more bad news, you know?" She softened her voice and started pacing as she continued her litany. "Which I guess in retrospect is why you wouldn't tell me because you knew I would be upset. So I guess you guys were really just being nice instead of secretive to keep it from me…" Tony and Tim's heads were spinning at Abby's upside down narrative of how bad and good it was that they didn't tell her things about Gibbs.

 _Gibbs_. Tony tried to hide his intense relief that her rant had not been about Ziva. Out of the corner of his eye he could see McGee slightly slump in his chair. Tony shook his head in denial. "Abby, _no_ …he's doing better. Remember what we found out the day before at the hospital? You saw him yourself last night." In fact, Tony had sent a desperate text to Ziva to make sure she was not in his room when he found out Abby was on her way to the visit the injured man.

Abby was not appeased. "But that was yesterday! Something bad could have happened today, and, and…" By now, McGee had gotten up and was standing by her side, his hand on her arm to try to settle her nerves. Bishop was also standing, looking confused by the whole exchange.

"Listen to me Abby." McGee's voice was calm reason in the midst of a storm. "Nothing has changed. There has been no news of Gibbs today. We would have told you if something had happened. Just…go back to work, ok?" Abby eyed him closely, looking for any signs that he was holding anything back. She finally dropped her shoulders in relief and gave McGee a quick hug.

"Thank you, McGee. I…you have to _promise_." She looked at her friend closely. Tim nodded slightly and patted her arm. When she had finally left to return to her lab, Tony and Tim both groaned. Bishop eyed them speculatively, not convinced they weren't actually hiding something, something that just wasn't about _Gibbs_.

Tony looked at his watch. "McGee, you and I are up in MTAC. Bishop, check out those bank records for Budd." Bishop nodded and got to work at her computer, relieved to have something constructive to do. This was what she excelled at: research, putting random facts together and analyzing them to come to a valid conclusion. After more than a year of field work, she had often questioned her change in venue but she was also one who refused to admit defeat. And so she continued to be the little Probie.

After about thirty minutes Bishop kept hearing an odd noise, but tried to shrug it off. It finally got so annoying she couldn't concentrate on her work. She looked up and frowned, gazing around as she tried to pinpoint the source of this buzzing she kept hearing. Getting up, she followed the sound until she was at Tony's desk. Her frown deepened as the insistent buzz-like tone continued. Glancing over her shoulder to see if anyone was watching her, she quietly opened the side top drawer of his desk. Lying on top of a small velvet box was his cell phone. She knew at once it was his personal phone as opposed to his work cell and hesitating only slightly, picked it up to shut the thing off, glancing briefly at the display:

" _Gibbs is doing well, more later. XX OO"_

She cocked an eyebrow in surprise, wondering who would be sending Tony a personal text about Gibbs and then leaving a valediction of "kisses and hugs". She knew that he had broken things off with Keates, and she was sure she would have heard if they were back together again, not to mention that there would be no reason for Zoe to be at Gibbs' beside. Sighing at her inability to figure out this puzzle, Bishop went to place the phone back into the drawer, but a glint of gold caught her eye. Carefully lifting the necklace, she wondered about this new clue: a golden Star of David necklace. Why would Tony keep this in his drawer? After working together for over a year, she realized that she didn't know quite as much about Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo as she thought…

"Can I help you with something, Agent Bishop?" Tony's voice left no mistake that he wasn't please to find her at his desk, holding Ziva's necklace. He abruptly took the jewelry out her grasp, caressing it lightly as if to be assured that it had come to no harm.

"Tony! I…I'm sorry! Your phone was buzzing and it wouldn't shut off…"

"Fine, I get it. In the future just call me on my _other_ cell phone, ok?" Tony was looking at his cell that he had left in his desk, silently berating himself for that singular lapse in judgment. He smiled at Ziva's message, the x's and o's reminding him of when he was flying to Israel to meet up with her. That had been a brief, happy moment, until all hell broke loose.

"So, Gibbs is doing ok? Who's it from?" Tony leveled his gaze at Bishop, thinking maybe it was time for her to return to the NSA. He ignored her question and pocketed his phone.

"What did you find about the bank records?" Tony effectively ended the inquiry and returned the focus to the case. As he listened to Bishop switching gears and talking about the case, he lightly fingered the phone, thinking of Ziva and what a difference a few days could make.

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda**

Ziva sat quietly in the chair, reading a well-thumbed novel she had found in the intensive care waiting room. She made a mental note to herself to check out the local Barnes and Noble for a half way decent book to read. She shifted in her chair and glanced over at the sleeping man, still intubated but according to the doctors improving very quickly. So quickly in fact that they were thinking about extubating him to see how he did with just a nasal cannula for oxygen delivery.

Ziva didn't understand all of the medical mumbo jumbo, but she got the basics that they had been adjusting the controls on the huge breathing machine next to the bed. _Ventilator_ , she reminded herself, wanting to be as knowledgeable about Gibbs' care as possible. They had essentially turned the dials down until they were almost off, other than supplying oxygen. The good news was that Gibbs was breathing of his own accord. But he had still remained stubbornly unconscious.

Yesterday when she was visiting, she found the Buck mortise chisel she had gifted to him in the drawer of the bedside table. She burst into tears at the memory of that exchange, a difficult time for her and Gibbs, _and Tony_. She didn't understand why it was here at his bedside, not having heard McGee tell Tony of his visit to see Gibbs. Still, she wondered if the presence of the tool had somehow reached the recesses of his brain. She had placed it in his hand, unknowingly mimicking Tim's actions of the other day. She was positive she saw his hand twitch around it, but then she doubted herself, wanting to believe in the effect.

She recalled how she had visited Gibbs before, when he had been so seriously injured and didn't remember his team. She cried to him of Kate and Ari, and only by lightly slapping him on the back of his head did his memories start to return. She didn't take much credit for his recovery, as _anyone_ could have done that. But Jenny had taken great stock in her words and thanked her for bringing Gibbs back to all of them, short-lived as it was at the time.

Later that night, she told Tony of the chisel and he quickly figured out that must have been what McGee had taken to him. They both wondered at the irony of Tim selecting that particular tool and Tony took great pains to try to convince her that it was because it was _Ziva's_ gift; that was why Gibbs responded and was now moving toward a recovery. She was not so easily convinced, but she felt a warm feeling in her chest that Tony believed it to be so. As they sat together on his leather couch, Tony drew her to him; his arm around her shoulders and holding her hand with his other.

They had talked about their "date" and expectations, both laughing at their shared relief of Tim showing up and preventing any miscues and awkwardness between the pair. Tony was honest and upfront with his desires, that they embark on a romantic relationship and explore their feelings. He didn't voice any of his fears or concerns at this point, but Ziva knew Anthony DiNozzo and was astute enough to realize what had not been said.

"I am here now, Tony. I had wanted to do this last year as I told you. I have long wanted to see what we could have together, to see if we could move past the many obstacles in our path and discover if there was a future for us as… _life_ partners as opposed to _work_ partners." Ziva took a deep breath, the words not as easy to say as they were to feel and winced slightly that it may have sounded too much of permanence when they weren't there yet. "I know your concerns; all I can say at this time is let us see what happens, yes? I would like to do this with you, if you are willing." At that, Tony grabbed her face gently and kissed her with a passion that had been building up since he left Israel.

By mutual agreement, they decided to keep their burgeoning relationship out of the bedroom for the time being. Tony longed to feel her soft skin against his, to relive the bliss that enveloped him while he was in Israel. But the sting of that separation was still vivid, and he didn't think his heart could take another. He didn't know if Ziva felt the same concerns, but she was not surprised at Tony suggesting that they keep their clothes on for the moment, nor did she seem hurt or rejected. In fact, they were loath to even refer to themselves as being more than very, _very_ good friends. Eight years of back and forth cannot be totally negated in three days, despite an interlude nineteen months ago in which feelings were finally shared and consummated. Instead, they decided that they were "seeing each other." Ziva chuckled at their semantics.

"And yet here we are, in your apartment. I will need to find someplace else to live Tony if we are only _seeing each other_." She teased him gently. Tony opened his mouth in protest but Ziva softly placed her hand on his cheek. "Tony, you cannot keep sleeping on the couch. It is not good for you. You are working all hours so when you _can_ sleep, it needs to be as good as it can be, yes? For almost a year, I have been sleeping on cots, with little more than a thin cotton blanket and sometimes not even that. I am not working right now, it is not critical that I always be at my best."

Tony found it hard to not agree with her logic but he just couldn't make himself give up the sofa to her. "I just can't do that, Ziva. It's…a matter of pride I guess. I know you can whip my ass, but please let me be a gentleman about this." Ziva rolled her eyes in annoyance at such an idea as Tony giving up a good night's sleep so he could feel better about himself.

"Then maybe I should look elsewhere to stay, Tony." She reiterated. Tony looked so crestfallen that Ziva took pity on him and tabled the discussion for the time being. But she couldn't resist getting in the last word. "Perhaps then, you should consider purchasing a larger bed, yes?" With that she sashayed into the bathroom to take a shower, leaving Tony with his mouth hanging open.

" _DiNozzo, you are in serious trouble." He said to himself. He turned to his goldfish. "Did you just hear what she said?"_

Back in the present _,_ Ziva leaned forward in the hard chair in the hospital room and stifled a yawn, standing up to stretch and get the kinks out. **"** Gibbs, you need to wake up very soon because sitting here is not doing very well for my backside." Ziva rubbed her bottom as an exclamation point. She walked to the large window and looked out, smiling at the bright blue sky that reminded her so much of Gibbs' eyes.

"Excuse me, Miss?" Ziva turned abruptly at the sudden voice that startled her out of her reverie. She relaxed her stance when she saw the ICU physician and several other doctors standing at the door. "We're going to need you to leave for a bit while we work on Agent Gibbs."

Ziva frowned, her worry etched in her features. "Work on him? Is something wrong? Do I need to call anyone?" She anxiously rubbed her hand, the knuckles almost white with her exertion. Dr. Lane smiled apologetically.

"No, no…everything is fine. We're going to take the breathing tube out and remove the ventilator. He's been breathing on his own for a while now and doing well." Ziva felt her body go limp in relief. She smiled and grabbed her things.

"Thank you, I will be in the waiting room. Will it take long? I mean, should I stay?" Ziva didn't want to leave unless it was absolutely necessary. And she wanted to see how he did before she called Tony with this new development.

"Give us about an hour, we'll want to observe him in case we need to put the tube back in. Go get some coffee or something to eat, why don't you?" The doctors had already started filing in and it was starting to get a bit crowded. Ziva squeezed her way out of the room, wondering why it was going to take so many to do this procedure but she didn't ask any questions. She wondered if she should give Tony a head's up but then considered he was probably so busy she didn't want to distract him.

Still, she felt he should have some sort of update so she quickly sent him a text and then headed down to the cafeteria. After lingering over a barely drinkable cup of tea for an hour, Ziva found her way back up to the ICU and lingered outside the unit, waiting for permission to visit with Gibbs again after the medical team was through with their procedures. One of the nurses finally poked her head out of the automatic doors and waved to get Ziva's attention. She immediately got to her feet and came forward, anxious to see the man who gave her so much. Ziva stood hesitantly at the door way, tears coming to her eyes to see him without that thing down his throat. She moved to his bedside, gently taking his hand and lightly brushing his hair. "You look like my Gibbs, now." She whispered; her voice full of emotion. Gibbs stirred slightly and too her astonishment and joy, he began to try to open his eyes.

"Ziver?" Gibbs' voice was so faint and hoarse Ziva almost didn't hear him.

"Yes Gibbs, it is I. I am here with you. You are going to be ok." Ziva allowed the tears to roll down her cheeks in her relief that he was finally awake. Her relief was short lived.

"Ziva?" At the sound of the familiar voice from the doorway, Ziva stiffened. Slowly raising her eyes from her adopted father to the figure just standing in the room, she finally came face to face with the one person she had been hoping to avoid.

 _ **I did**_ _ **not**_ _ **just do that! Well, the identity will be revealed in the next chapter. Thank again for reading and I hope you like this installment. It's quite a bit longer than usual but I wanted to move it along**_


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks as always for the kind reviews, faves and follows. Some new stuff just came out, so if you forgot this was spoilerific,** _ **STOP NOW**_ **.**

 **The premiere is titled "Stop the Bleeding." There will be no time jump but I think we already knew that since the premiere takes off where it left off. I guess what this means is that the entire first episode will be taking place in May where we left off and the ending of the episode will not show Gibbs on crutches sitting at his desk four months later. Jon Cryer from "Two and a Half Men" fame has been cast as Dr. Taft, a "celebrated Navy surgeon" who operates on Gibbs and will be in three episodes. I am somewhat perplexed by the photo of Gibbs in the hospital as it looks like he has a bandage around his head and it also looks to me like his abdomen. There is an x-ray of his leg and his torso in the picture. The head of his femur where it connects to the patella or maybe the patella is shattered and it looks like the chest bullet fragmented. He should have a pneumothorax. He should be dead. He is only using a nasal cannula for oxygen but he should be intubated and on a ventilator. I can't tell if this is the ER or a hospital room or maybe a ship. There is a portable x-ray machine in the room. It is definitely not the operating room as no one is gowned and masked, although it looks like he is holding forceps and in an interview Jon Cryer states they filmed the surgery scenes. Apparently he cracks jokes while doing surgery. I know too much and am very picky about medical scenes.**

 **And still no Ziva…**

 _ **Ziva stood hesitantly at the door way, tears coming to her eyes to see him without that thing down his throat. She moved to his bedside, gently taking his hand and lightly brushing his hair. "You look like my Gibbs, now." She whispered; her voice full of emotion. Gibbs stirred slightly and too her astonishment and joy, he began to try to open his eyes.**_

" _ **Ziver?" Gibbs' voice was so faint and hoarse Ziva almost didn't hear him.**_

" _ **Yes Gibbs, it is I. I am here with you. You are going to be ok." Ziva allowed the tears to roll down her cheeks in her relief that he was finally awake. Her relief was short lived.**_

" _ **Ziva?" At the sound of the familiar voice from the doorway, Ziva stiffened. Slowly raising her eyes from her adopted father to the figure just standing in the room, she finally came face to face with the one person she had been hoping to avoid.**_

Usual Disclaimer: Sadly disclaimed

"Lost and Found"- Chapter Eleven

 _Be'er Sheva, Israel- April 2014_

 _Ziva hummed to herself as she patted the remainder of the soil in place, smoothing the barren ground so that it looked undisturbed and pristine. She glanced around the orchard, smiling in memory of the last time she had been in this spot. Although at the time she had not been in a good place personally, Tony being by her side had made a difficult time more bearable. She focused on the happy moments of their days together, brief as they may have been._

 _Not returning to DC with Tony was the hardest decision she had ever made, but she truly believed that she was not worthy and needed to atone for her sins. Her months in Be'er Sheva at the shelter had given her space and a perspective that had sorely been lacking in October. She finally came to terms with her past and felt that she was at a point in her life where she was ready to move on, to move forward. Her only fear was that Tony's offer would not still be available._

 _She stood up and wiped the dirt off of her pants. She had added to her "I Will", marking her breakthrough and current happiness. Tony had helped her add to her list when he was with her, after spending almost four months searching her to make sure she was safe. He had surprised her with his "proposal" that she come back to DC with him, as in to be "with him". She thought long and hard and Tony had made every effort to entice her to accept his offer. And it was enticing, so much so that Ziva almost relented from her journey of self-discovery. But in the end, she was not ready to have that journey be with him and with great sadness she had to say no._

 _Her work at the shelter gave her time to add perspective to her own story of horror, and the unconditional acceptance of her presence and help had been as a balm to soothe an old wound. As the days, weeks and months passed, Ziva felt a growing sense of ease at the path her life had taken and came to recognize that she had options she had always thought were forbidden to her._

 _An anonymous letter with a typed message arrived in January, almost as a New Year's resolution. At first she was perplexed by its hidden meaning and she wondered who had sent it. She would periodically take it out and re-read it, pondering over the eloquent words. She understood what it was saying; she just didn't understand how it could possibly apply to her and her life. However, it is true that time heals and after several months, the mysterious letter helped to give her some clarity. And so she made her decision to return, to Tony. She had achieved a calm and acceptance of herself that truly astonished her, and was anxious to share her new-found well-being with the most important person in her life._

 _But Ziva also realized that as she had changed, so may had Tony. And her leaving the team had not been a happy celebration she imagined. She did not know how the others viewed her departure, although she had intimated to Tony that they would understand. She had received a text from McGee right away and his encouraging words and honest regret at her leaving left her both happy and sad at the same time._

 _With a nervousness that made her stomach flip with anxiety, she called the one person she knew would be honest and just. She didn't want to be told what she wanted to hear; she wanted to be told the truth. This was a double-edged sword and Ziva was acutely aware that the blade's sting could be acute. As the phone kept ringing, Ziva paced about the living room, her excitement and worry competing with each other to take over._

" _Hello?" Ziva smiled warmly as the familiar voice filled her heart with happy memories._

" _Hello…it is I, Ziva. I hope this is a good time?" There was a sharp intake of breath and a brief pause before her phone companion continued._

" _Ziva? I…what a surprise. How…how are you doing?" Ziva's wide smile told of her contentment._

" _I am doing very well, I am...good." Ziva paused. "I am calling because I need to ask you something, to ask your opinion. You have always been so…I value your judgment and I know you will tell me the truth."_

 _Again, there was a slight pause. "I will do my very best, Ziva. What is your question?"_

 _Ziva now became very nervous, as the answer to the question she was about to ask could determine her immediate future. "I…I would like to come back to DC. After these months on my own, I have realized that I am…I miss my family and being here in Israel, by myself, is not the best thing for me. It was a hard decision for me to make, to stay here and not go back with Tony. It was something I needed to do, but I am now ready to return." She realized she was rambling and talking very fast. She stopped to take a breath and waited for some response that she hoped would be positive. She didn't have long to wait, but it was not the response she had been longing to hear._

" _I see. Tell me Ziva; what exactly is your question? Is there a job for you here? Then I have to tell you the answer is no. The team has moved on, everyone has moved on and is doing quite well without Mossad." Ziva frowned at that. She hadn't been Mossad for years; she had quit and became a U.S. citizen. Did everyone forget that? Ziva found her voice, much less assured and now deflated._

" _I did not expect to take my old job back and that is not what I want to do at all. Has everyone really moved on? Has Tony…" Ziva could not conceal the catch in her voice, but she wasn't sure if the person on the other end of the line caught it or not._

" _Tony is back to his normal self, no thanks to you and your machinations. He searched for you for months and you threw it back into his face. And you call yourself a friend. You have been no friend Ziva, I'm very sorry to say. It would be best that you stay exactly where you are and never return." Ziva stared at her reflection in the mirror as the line went dead, the tears running down her cheeks._

 _They all hated her; they didn't want to see her again; Tony…Ziva sank slowly to the floor, sobbing into her hands as the full realization hit her. Her love was lost to her and she had made her decision too late._

 _She stared at the crumpled letter, thinking it may apply to some but it would never apply to her:_ _"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference."_

Ziva now stared at the unwelcome visitor, the words of their final conversation vivid in her memory. She opened her mouth to respond to the single word uttered at her, but her voice failed her. Silently and quickly, she gathered her things and fled from the room, the visitor looking at her in puzzlement at her retreating backside.

Frowning, the visitor made their way over to the bedside and smiled warmly at the now awake Gibbs; a Gibbs that was confused and foggy and could make no sense of what he had just witnessed.

"Welcome back, Jethro." Dr. Donald Mallard congratulated his friend on his recovery and return to consciousness, not thinking about the words spoken in anger to the young woman who had just left their presence.

"Ziver?" Gibbs asked again, this time questioning why she had left so suddenly. Ducky sighed and shook his head.

"I am not quite sure what that was about, Jethro. Perhaps she was just overwhelmed by your waking up. But it is no concern of yours. All you need to think about right now is getting back on your feet, literally and figuratively." The doctor patted his shoulder and pulled up the now vacant chair, ready to sit at his friend's bedside. As the silence took over the room, Ducky wondered over Ziva's strange behavior. He was a bit surprised to see that she had come, considering how she had left. But then again, he hadn't really understood anything she had done in the past year and months she had been gone.

The last time he had talked to her, she had called _him_ , to ask his opinion regarding her possible return. She had asked for honesty and he had bowed to her wishes, as uncomfortable as the truth may have been. Surely she didn't blame him for being honest, did she? Ducky shook his head, thinking how naïve she had been to think her job would have been waiting for her.

In his mind, he had been totally truthful that the team had moved on, as Bishop had been hired and was now seated at her desk. All he kept thinking about was his conversation with Gibbs regarding how upset he had been with Tony and his pursuit of Ziva. Yes, he had been _correct_ to tell her to not come back, as it would make Gibbs happier to not have to deal with a scrambled-brained, distracted DiNozzo, he had told himself. A while he did consider he had been a bit harsh, she did not see what the others were left to deal with in the wake of her departure.

No, he had given her the truth, just as she had asked. It was a sad thing he had to do, and it had given him no pleasure. Palmer had shown up just after he had ended the call and wondered what the doctor was upset about. Ducky had just sighed and said. _"It is nothing, Mr. Palmer. No reason for you to worry."_

Palmer frowned and looked confused. _"I don't understand."_

Ducky just patted his arm and walked away. _"I hope you never do, Mr. Palmer. I hope you never do."_

The fatal flaw in Ducky's rationale was that he hadn't considered that there may have been a different reason for her desire to return; and that Anthony DiNozzo would have welcomed her back with open arms.

 **NCIS- Navy Yard**

Bishop drummed her fingers on her desk, thinking about her encounter with Tony over her going through his desk. Although her intent had not been to snoop and pry into his personal life, she was nevertheless intrigued by what she had found. The text and the necklace were significant, she was sure of that, and she was now beginning to wonder if one was related in any way to the other.

She knew early on from McGee that her predecessor had been Israeli and that Tony had been gone over four months to find her and bring her back to work. Nothing more was really said about the incident other than the obvious conclusion that he had come back without her. Tony rarely spoke of her to Bishop, and when he did it seemed to be with so much reluctance she had assumed that he and Ziva had not necessarily been friends but he had tried to get her back as any good partner would. The presence of the necklace now called that earlier assumption into question.

Coming to a decision, she got up quickly and strode to the elevator. If there was anyone who would know the answer to this nagging puzzle, it would be Abby Sciuto. Bishop entered the lab with no preamble and wasn't surprised to see Abby hard at work processing evidence for one of the other teams stationed at the Navy Yard. She had no idea how Abby could do so much work on her own, but then there was still a lot she didn't understand about NCIS is general.

Abby sensed her presence before she could utter a word, and looked in her direction, smiling at her visitor and beckoning her over. "What's up, Bishop? You don't actually have any evidence for me to process do you?" The wide eyes and hopeful voice made Bishop sorry that she couldn't accommodate Abby's wishes. She shook her head and looked over her shoulder. Abby followed her gaze and then looked back at the young women, giving her a questioning look.

"Tony got a text from someone, saying Gibbs was doing well." She blurted out unceremoniously, frowning even deeper than she usually did. Abby looked thrilled at first, but then caught on to what Bishop wasn't saying.

"What do you mean from _someone_? Didn't Tony tell you who it was? Why wouldn't he tell you who it was?" Bishop shrugged and looked over her shoulder again. She moved closer to Abby, keeping her voice at a whisper.

"He didn't actually get the text at first. His phone was buzzing and annoying me so I pulled it out of his desk drawer to shut it off." Bishop trailed off when she saw the look of horror on Abby's face that Bishop not only admitted to invading Tony's privacy but it would also appear that she got caught. Ellie winced at Abby's conclusion.

"Yes, I know. It wasn't pretty. But I honestly wasn't trying to pry; I just wanted to shut the damn phone off!" She leaned in even closer, causing Abby to mirror her actions. "I also found a necklace, a Star of David on a gold chain. He was not happy I found that and…" Bishop trailed off when she saw Abby widen her eyes in surprise and her face become a bit paler than normal.

"What is the deal with this necklace, Abby? For some reason I think the necklace has something to do with the text, but I can't explain why. Who does it belong to? What does it mean and why in the world would Tony have it?" Abby stepped away and began pacing, her mind whirling with unanswered questions.

She knew without a doubt that the necklace had belonged to Ziva. She was slightly put out that Tony never mentioned that she had given it to him and considering the way things turned out, she couldn't imagine why he kept it at all, much less in his desk drawer where he would see it every day. That thought stopped her in her tracks: Was it there the entire time he had been dating Keates? Had he never been as fully vested in the relationship as he had led them all to believe?

Abby had been disappointed when Tony casually told her he had stopped seeing the BATF agent. Abby had really liked her, but then again she only saw her in the work setting. Abby looked up and saw that Bishop was impatiently waiting for some explanation. Abby sighed, as she truly didn't have the answers, just guesses based on prior knowledge.

She took a deep breath and returned to the younger agent's side as she began to try to give a history lesson to the newest team member. "OK, I am certain the necklace was Ziva's. I mean, she had a gold Star of David necklace that she always wore. I just didn't know she had given it to Tony." Abby bit her lip and considered how much she should reveal. Deciding it would help Bishop understand DiNozzo better, she decided to take the plunge.

"Tony and Ziva had a…complicated relationship. They were a great team, Tony and Ziva as partners were _dynamite_ , you know? But it was much more than that. They knew each other so well and they saw each other at their worst and their best. It kind of got messy at times." Abby frowned.

Bishop frowned even deeper, the crease in her forehead pronounced, not quite understanding what Abby was getting at. "Do you mean they were a couple? I thought Gibbs had a rule about that." She wracked her brain trying to remember a rule that had no meaning for her since she was already married. Abby shushed her, getting Bishop to lower her voice.

"Not while Ziva was here, at least I don't think so although I often wondered at how close they really were." Abby closed her eyes as she remembered the summer of 2013. "Tony was gone for _months_ looking for Ziva. He was worried about her safety; we were _all_ worried. This Parsa guy was out there gunning for the team and Ziva had been attacked in Israel and then went off the grid. We needed to get her back in one piece. Tony was the only one who could do that." Bishop listened eagerly to this new bit of information, helping her to understand the team dynamics bit more than when she had first come on board. She nodded in understanding when she fitted some of this into what she already knew.

"But he didn't do it. She stayed in Israel, correct? That's why I got her job." Abby smiled sadly. As happy as she was that Bishop came to the team, she still did miss Ziva occasionally. Her loss had been a blow to everyone, but Abby knew it was much harder on Tony. He had admitted to her privately what he had tried to do to get Ziva to return with him. She had been shocked at his admission and had been sympathetic since he was so upset Ziva had stayed in Israel. But after he kept moping around about it, she got a bit aggravated and whined to Gibbs about it. Ducky had even said something to her about how Ziva's departure had affected Tony in such a negative way. And like Ducky, she began to blame Ziva for hurting Tony.

She had tried and tried to get him to move on, and was finally relieved and thrilled when he started dating Keates. She truly believed that the specter of Ziva had at last left the building and Tony's frame of mind. Now knowing that her necklace had been in his possession all this time disabused her of that notion. It would seem that he had truly never gotten of her and his failure to bring her home.

But what did any of this have to do with the text message? Abby had a very analytical brain and was more in tune with Bishop than any of the others were, but she didn't see the leap in logic she presented with this theory. Leaving the Tony and Ziva narrative aside for the moment, she asked this question of Bishop, who by now had pulled up a stool and was arranging paperclips into straight lines. "So what makes you think the necklace has anything to do with the text message?"

Bishop looked up at Abby and shrugged slightly. "I can't put my finger on it. Maybe it was the way he held the necklace when he took it out of my hand, and the way he smiled at the message when he read it, especially with those xx's and o's at the end. I mean, whoever sent it also sent Tony kisses and hugs…" She shrugged again; clearly disturbed that she didn't have a clear answer. Abby turned away, thinking about what she had just heard, her brain firing on all cylinders as she tried to decipher the clues. She could only come to one conclusion and it stunned her into complete silence.

 _ **Well, I guess the reveal is a big surprise to many of you since Abby was the front runner. It has always been Ducky. I was very upset with David McCallum's comments regarding Cote's departure and he is now on my - list. PP is a close second, and Abby has not completely been exonerated. But Ducky is the one she called and the one who told her to stay away. Much more of Bishop in this chapter than what I had planned for the entire story, but she's a good character to move things along with Abby. And finally Palmer enters the story, if only as an aside. And now I am waiting for "Under Covers" to air on USA later!**_


	12. Chapter 12

**I figured I might get some feedback regarding my reveal but I am overwhelmed! Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my stories, all of them. A response to a couple: BATF is the real name for ATF. Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. It is often called ATF for short. To "Sorry" who was confused that I have stated I no longer watch the show so how can I be talking about spoilers: I don't watch the show every Tuesday night and DVR every episode like I used to. And for the first time I have not purchased the newest season DVD collection. But I do read the reviews and check the internet for updates, all in the hope of some mention of Cote/Ziva returning. I did watch the finale because of the few comments out there that the "death" could be Ziva or that she might show up to help. Hope that clears things up for you.**

 **I purposely left the timing between Gibbs being shot and when Ziva shows up at Tony's apartment vague to accommodate new spoilers as they come out. This chapter reflects that. If you forgot there may be some REAL SPOILERS ABOUT THE SHOW in this story and you don't want to know, as much as it pains me to say this I would read no further.**

 _ **She had tried and tried to get him to move on, and was finally relieved and thrilled when he started dating Keates. She truly believed that the specter of Ziva had at last left the building and Tony's frame of mind. Now knowing that her necklace had been in his possession all this time disabused her of that notion. It would seem that he had truly never gotten of her and his failure to bring her home.**_

 _ **But what did any of this have to do with the text message? Abby had a very analytical brain and was more in tune with Bishop than any of the others were, but she didn't see the leap in logic she presented with this theory. Leaving the Tony and Ziva narrative aside for the moment, she asked this question of Bishop, who by now had pulled up a stool and was arranging paperclips into straight lines. "So what makes you think the necklace has anything to do with the text message?"**_

 _ **Bishop looked up at Abby and shrugged slightly. "I can't put my finger on it. Maybe it was the way he held the necklace when he took it out of my hand, and the way he smiled at the message when he read it, especially with those xx's and o's at the end. I mean, whoever sent it also sent Tony kisses and hugs…" She shrugged again; clearly disturbed that she didn't have a clear answer. Abby turned away, thinking about what she had just heard, her brain firing on all cylinders as she tried to decipher the clues. She could only come to one conclusion and it stunned her into complete silence.**_

 **Disclaimer: These characters are not owned by me.**

"Lost and Found"- Chapter Twelve

Tony DiNozzo was frustrated. Being trapped for two hours in MTAC would be enough to try anyone's patience. And when the persons on the screen with whom one was conversing were military and old school blowhards who sneered at every one of your comments and suggestions, it was quite appropriate to wish that you were in the middle of a video game where you could just vanquish your opponent by the simple press of a button. It was all Tony could do to keep his eyes from rolling too loudly.

But these morons who thought they could handle the Daniel Budd investigation far better than little NCIS were not the current source of Tony's dilemma. They questioned incessantly the appropriateness of Agent DiNozzo and Officer Teague taking their search to Shanghai after Gibbs had been transferred to the _USNS Comfort_ for emergency trauma surgery, all based on some nebulous intelligence Teague had received from the CIA. _"Yes, your assessment was correct in that Daniel Budd was there as well as the young man who shot Agent Gibbs, as you made a big show of chasing them through the alleys and marketplaces of an old Shanghai, but you didn't catch Budd, did you? No, you didn't. Oh, and by the way, did you realize you were in China, as in…China?"_

During the less than cordial meeting, Tony's and Vance's cell phones had beeped and buzzed numerous times. Courtesy prevented them from taking the devices from their pockets to see what was so important at first, but finally after giving each other the eye and silently communicating to one another that it might have to do with the very subject now being debated, Vance politely informed the other parties that he needed to check his messages.

Vance sucked in his breath and smiled in relief. "Good news, Gentlemen. Agent Gibbs is awake and talking." Tony almost sagged at the news, glad to hear something good for a change. The occupants on the screen all nodded in agreement that this was indeed good news and made some not so kind remarks that maybe now some progress could be made. Tony finally had enough and stood his ground and told the assemblage that he, Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo was in charge of the investigation of Daniel Budd and if any of them were unable or unwilling to assist he suggested that they find someone in their various agencies who was capable.

The stunned silence was punctuation by the smirk on Vance's face. "I think about sums it up. If there are no further discussions we will end this. Good day." Vance gave the cut sign to the technicians and the screen went blank.

Bringing up the _Shanghai Affair,_ as McGee like to refer to it, reminded Tony of immediately after Gibbs was shot, and still conscious. Tony was up to his forearms in his blood, trying to keep it from spilling all over the sandy ground. Gibbs struggled to speak despite Tony's efforts to make him keep still and quiet.

" _Keep him safe, DiNozzo. Don't let them hurt him." Tony shook his head, not agreeing with what he was saying but he didn't think now was the time to argue the point. Tony had no intention of letting that murderous little terrorist get off scot-free._

" _TONY!" Gibbs gasped. Tony glared at his Boss, his stress and fear making him angry._

" _Just shut up, Gibbs! I got this! I will take care of everything, the way it needs to be. I know you have a soft spot for kids, but that kid just KO'd you in the worst soft spot ever. Now shut the hell up!" Gibbs glared at his SFA until he finally lost consciousness._

"Well, that went better than I thought." Vance chuckled, bringing Tony back to the present. "Although I have to admit they gave it a more vigorous argument than I expected." Tony just grunted in response; busy flipping through the numerous text messages and two missed calls. "Good news about Gibbs. I expect your team already knows since we were delayed but you will probably want to head down to make sure everyone has been notified." Tony looked up at that, not missing the "your team" part of his comment.

He decided to not point out the adjective as it was obvious that this was now Tony's team, and remembering his last encounter with Gibbs, he reminded himself that he was going to continue to follow _his_ gut, and _not_ Gibbs'. "Well, so far I have texts from everyone except Ernie the mailroom guy, so I think the word is out. But you're right; I'll go back and see how things are going. I'm sure my team will want to go see Gibbs but I'll make that call once I check on the status of our investigation." Tony nodded to Vance and turned on his heel. He hadn't been kidding when he said he had gotten texts from everyone but he was starting to worry.

The first two texts regarding Gibbs' return to the land of the living were sent from Ducky and Ziva, sent in fact almost simultaneously. That gave Tony pause and made his gut start to churn. He then started receiving texts and calls from Abby, Bishop, McGee and Palmer, but nothing further from Ziva. No one had mentioned Ziva yet except McGee, and that was to make sure Tony told Ziva that Gibbs was awake. If Ducky and Ziva were at Gibbs' bedside at the same time when he woke up, no one else knew about it.

He was worried that he hadn't heard any more from Ziva but that could be because he hadn't responded to her yet. Still, he didn't like the scenario that was playing out in his mind and quickly punched in her cell phone number. Much to his relief, she answered almost immediately but in that relief he didn't detect the bare hollowness of her voice.

"Ziva, I'm so sorry! I've been trapped here in MTAC so I just got your message. Is everything ok?" Tony's question was loaded as he was asking about Gibbs, but more important to him was that _she_ was ok. The few beats of silence that ensued ratcheted his worry up a notch or two. As he tamped down his desire to start peppering her with questions, her small voice finally answered.

"He saw me." Tony frowned, not quite sure of her meaning, but worried his first thought had been accurate.

"You mean Gibbs saw you when he woke up?" Tony clarified, as he paced the mezzanine. He glanced down at the empty bullpen, assuming the team had taken it upon themselves to vacate the premises and descend upon the hospital as a swarm of locusts.

"No…well, _yes_ ; Gibbs did see me when he awoken. He recognized me and spoke my name, but, no; mostly no." Ziva's response did not enlighten the Senior Field Agent any further and in fact confused him even more.

"Are you thinking in Hebrew right now, because I have to tell you I'm not quite getting what you're saying here, Ziva." Tony felt very uneasy and his old insecurities regarding Ziva came flooding back. He shook his head to rid himself of these thoughts. She wasn't going rogue, for God's sake. But she could have been spooked. If she saw someone else she hadn't been expecting, or wanting to see; again he considered how quickly the two different texts had arrived.

" _HE_ saw me." Ziva reiterated, cementing Tony's fears that she had indeed been seen by someone and it bothered her a great deal. The fact that she named this person as a "he" by default told Tony who this ghost from her past was, a name that had been in his mind since her shocking revelation of what had happened a year ago.

Tony uttered an expletive and scrubbed at his face in frustration. Damn that Ducky! Tony had a feeling that the doctor may have been the person Ziva had called last year. It wasn't so much that the older man had been openly hostile about her departure, but more his seeming lack of caring that she was gone. Even when Ducky had brought up Ziva's departure and its effect on Tony when he was lying down on that morgue table, it wasn't spoken as one friend to another about a shared loss. Rather it was a clinical observation regarding the _dealing of loss_ , given with no emotion whatsoever.

However, Tony knew that Ziva admired the doctor and valued his opinion. He would be the logical choice for Ziva to submit her query if she was truly looking for an honest and unbiased answer. Unfortunately, Dr. Mallard was just as biased as any other person, and could not refrain from offering his personal views on the matter. Tony was so angry he could punch his fist through a wall, but he had more pressing concerns. He had to get to Ziva.

" _Are you ok? Where are you?"_ Tony didn't really believe that Ziva had taken off and was in hiding; after all she took his call immediately. But he really needed to be there for her, and if he was being honest, he needed her to be with him right now as well. Ducky's obtuseness had impacted his life as well. Ignorance is not bliss, and the past year of being oblivious to what Ducky had done had not provided Tony with any type of bliss whatsoever.

"I… I am at Gibbs'." Tony cocked an eyebrow at that, hoping she had gone back to the apartment. _The apartment_. He had taken to calling it that as opposed to _my_ apartment as he thought that sounded less welcoming and _home_ was just a bit too much at the moment. 

"Ok, hang on. I'll be there as soon I find out the status of the rest of the team. I will be there as soon as I _can_ , Ziva." Tony stressed his final sentence and she sighed in response, giving her assent. Tony ended the call and pounded down the stairs and looked around the bullpen. Making a decision, he took to the elevator and went outside, pulling out his phone and calling the one person who could be relied on at the moment.

"McGee, I need a SitRep!" Tony barked into the receiver as he strode quickly across the quadrangle. He swiped his security card at the entrance to the nondescript building and entered the sparse hallway. It was cold and uninviting but Tony was driven to be there at that very moment. With a heavily armed Marine at his side, Tony stood by as the door to the maximum security cell slid open. "Well, some good news for you…your charge of attempted murder looks like it's going to stay as "attempted murder"; not that it's going to make a whole hell of a lot of difference in the shit-storm that's going to rain down on your little terrorist ass." Tony spat at the lone occupant of the tiny compartment now called home.

Luke Harris looked up at the man who had apprehended him in Shanghai, left to his own devices after Daniel Budd took off to save his _own_ sorry ass. He couldn't make himself to feel anything, guilt, anger, sadness, remorse or triumph. He had stopped feeling the moment Daniel Budd had come into his existence, and effectively ended the life in the United States he had known.

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda**

Abby almost ran into the ICU room, barely able to contain her excitement and joy over the latest news of Gibbs and his return to consciousness. Ducky looked up as she practically launched herself at the bed, McGee almost not catching her in time before she crushed Gibbs in her enthusiasm.

"Abigail! Gibbs is awake but not quite ready to be the recipient of one of your famous hugs. A bit of restraint if you please!" Ducky's admonishment brought Abby up short and she offered profuse apologies.

"Oh Gibbs, I would _never_ hurt you! You know that, right? I'm just so happy you're awake. Tell me you're going to be ok!" Gibbs was already exhausted, just listening to Abby babble at top speed, but he gave her a small smile of thanks anyway.

"Glad to see you awake, Boss! You don't need to worry about anything, we have things covered and Tony's taking lead on getting Budd." McGee offered helpfully, thinking Gibbs would want to know immediately what was happening with the case.

"Whe…" Gibbs paused to clear his throat, his voice so rough and gravelly everyone winced. He painfully swallowed, trying to get some moisture into his mouth. He looked longingly for a water glass but then remembered that Dr. Taft had said he still couldn't drink or eat anything just yet until they monitored him for a bit more.

Dr. Cyril Taft had been flown out to the hospital ship to operate on Gibbs at the request of SecNav. He was renown, a leader in his field and famous for his surgical skills. Taft was also just as famous for his extreme lack of bedside manner and for being a total pain in the ass. But he had saved Gibbs life and his amazing abilities kept his naysayers at bay.

Once Gibbs finally woke up, the ICU Attending had paged the surgeon as a courtesy. Dr. Taft had arrived with his entourage as a celebrity, barking orders to all he deemed to be subordinate. He had read the riot act to Gibbs, telling him exactly what he was going to do, and _not do_ , as he improved. Gibbs had scowled at this unknown entity, have been unconscious long before the doctor had arrived on the scene. Taft just cut him off before he could even think of words to form in response. Gibbs had turned to Ducky to asked him just who in the hell that obnoxious guy was when a commotion outside of his room clued him in that a group of visitors were chomping at the bit to see him.

He tried again to voice his query. "Where…is…DiNozzo?" Gibbs finally croaked out. Bishop looked at McGee, thinking as the acting Senior Field Agent he should probably be the one to respond, but McGee didn't need her approval or prod.

"Tony and Vance were in MTAC when we got the news that you woke up. I'm sure he'll be here as soon as he can get away." McGee answered easily, but Gibbs didn't look appeased.

"Where…is…Ziva?" The room went still, Abby and Bishop looking at each other with surprised expressions while McGee studiously looked at the wall, trying to not reveal what he was privy to.

"Why would you ask that, Gibbs? Don't you remember? Ziva left us, she went back to Israel. She's not here, Gibbs." Abby stroked his arm soothingly, thinking his injuries had caused a lapse in his memory. But Gibbs only shook his head in denial, as Ducky cleared his throat.

"Actually, Miss David _is_ here. She was here, in this room, when Jethro woke up. I admit I am just as shocked as all of you are." Ducky looked pained to be the one to share this news, positive it would be unwelcomed. Abby's head snapped toward McGee.

"You knew this! You and Tony knew she was back! McGee! This is what you and Tony have been being all secretive about!" Abby punched him in the arm to emphasize her tirade.

Tim's eyes grew large and round as he rubbed the sting out of his upper arm. "Uh…"

"Tim…" Gibbs' voice was barely audible but the emotion he conveyed brought everyone's attention back to him.

" _Tim, I need to see Ziva."_

 **Gibbs Home- Arlington VA**

Tony paused on the porch of the Arlington home, memories flooding his senses of how many times he had taken these very steps. He tried to not think of the multiple occasions he had ventured into the sawdust and bourbon filled basement to discuss his concerns regarding Ziva, but once again she had brought him to Gibbs' home. He smiled softly as the door opened easily, no lock barring any unwelcome guest.

The house was darkened and Tony looked around expecting to see Ziva sitting on the sofa, curled up within herself. He was surprised she wasn't there waiting and considered his options. Tony didn't really believe that Ziva would be in the basement, but he wasn't positive so he headed in that direction. A noise upstairs caused him to stop and peer up to the landing. Smiling, he took the treads two at a time and wandered down the hall until he came to the closed door with the light glowing beneath its threshold.

Not wanting to startle her he knocked softly and called out. "Ziva, it's me. Are you decent?" Tony hoped by injecting a bit of humor he could help diffuse the potentially explosive situation they now found themselves in. Ziva shocked him by pulling the door open and yanking him inside.

Tony caught his stumble and then looked around in confusion as he watched Ziva return to what she had been doing, which looked to Tony like she was making the bed. Still, Tony had to ask. "What are you doing, Ziva?" Ziva looked up, her face slightly sweaty with her exertion, her hair caught up in a short ponytail with errant wisps and tendrils about her neck. Tony thought she looked absolutely beautiful.

"I am getting Gibbs' ready to be home, Tony. He is now awake. Soon he will be able to come back here and it will need to be clean and welcoming. It has not been cleaned in a while…" She was busy swiping at wrinkles, plumping pillows and pulling sheets tight as she explained her actions. Tony sighed and walked closer to her, finally grasping her wrist to get her to stop.

" _Ziva…"_ Tony's voice was quiet and full of emotion, understanding only now how changed Ziva had become. In the past, her first thought would have been to access her weapons cache and plot her next move. Now, here she was being domestic and concerned over Gibbs' comfort. The contrast was sharp and jarring. Tony took a brief moment to mourn the loss of the Ziva he had known and fallen in love with, and then he gratefully accepted the woman she had become and fell in love with her all over again.

He sat on the pristine bed, messing up the tight corners she had labored at and pulled her to his side. She looked surprised but acquiesced. He stroked her cheek, and then kissed her hand. "Gibbs won't be home for a while. You don't need to do this right now. It can wait. _All_ of this can wait, Ziva." She looked at the love and concern on his face, knowing she was avoiding her inner turmoil by doing something that was fairly mindless. She closed her eyes at her admission and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"What do I do, Tony? When I saw him, I…I panicked. I couldn't even speak. What if he tells the others and they believe him? Maybe he already has…"

"Shhh…that's enough, Sweetheart. You already know that McGee and Vance are friends. If you don't want to see Ducky or Abby or _anyone_ for that matter…you don't ever have to see them again. I have your back on this, Ziva. I will _always_ be with you, I promise; for as long as you let me." Tony kissed her temple, feeling so emotional at the moment that he was afraid he might lose it. He was aware that he had just committed himself to her, the category yet to be determined but who was he kidding? He loved Ziva and he was going to do everything in his power to have her by his side for the rest of their days.

Tony mused that at least something good had come of his relationship with Zoe Keates: he had overcome his fear of commitment; he had re-learned to be a part of a couple, skills he had excelled at years earlier with Wendy but went out with the bath water once she had crushed his spirit and confidence. As much as he had regretted his recent relationship with the federal agent, he was grateful those skills would now be put to good use.

Ziva sighed and her body relaxed as the stress oozed from her. "That seems so _final_ …in Israel I was alone and there was no chance of accidently bumping into anyone. But I am here now and it will be difficult to consciously avoid everyone. I do not want to live and constantly worry about seeing someone who isn't happy to see me anymore." Tony rubbed her back as she voice her concerns, not quite sure what to tell her so he wisely kept quiet. Ziva sat up and looked at Tony, holding on tight to his hand.

"I did think about this, before I came. I knew that at some point this would come and I would need to deal with the others. In the past, I had no concerns how others regarded me, and it made me reckless: I did things without considering the consequences, without thinking how my actions may affect others. And I paid the price, as did you." Ziva paused to collect her thoughts.

"And then I became so cautious I could not make a move without fear of hurting someone, and that cautiousness hurt those I loved the most." Tony closed his eyes in painful memory of getting on a plane by himself, without the love of his life.

"Tony, I thought that I had finally come to a place in between, that I could be caring and thoughtful in my decisions, but still be willing to take the hard stand if I needed to. Today, I realized that I am not there yet. I am still afraid; afraid that I will do something that will hurt others. That is why I ran. I couldn't stand up to Ducky, I couldn't tell him how much he had hurt me, how _wrong_ he was." A small sob caught at Ziva's throat.

" _I am weak."_

Tony grabbed Ziva's face and kissed her, hard. Ziva's shock quickly yielded to desire, as she responded to his touch. After a few moments, they pulled back and rested their foreheads against each other to catch their breath. Ziva chucked softly as she stroked Tony's cheek. "If that is how you plan to stop my panic attacks, I have to say that I approve."

Tony looked into her eyes, smiling in response to her own self-deprecating humor. He straightened up, taking both of her hands. "Ziva, my love; you are _not_ weak. You are the strongest person I know. Being strong doesn't mean that you'll resort to violence or drive away the people you care about most. It means that you can step back when you need to and you can take a stand when the occasion calls for that as well. Whatever you decide, however you want to handle the others is your decision and it is not wrong either way. But regardless of what you decide, I will be by your side. There is _nothing_ you can do to make me walk away."

Ziva looked down, the guilt of knowing that she had walked away almost consuming her. Tony immediately recognized his error, and lifted her chin. "I'm sorry, Ziva. I didn't mean that the way it came out. You did what you had to do and you accomplished far more than any of us could have imagined. You should be proud that you were strong and took a stand to do what was necessary to make a better _you_. You understand the difference right? I don't know if I'm explaining this right. I suck at this." Ziva looked up at that and leaned into his side.

"No, you do not suck at this, Tony. You have been amazing. Thank you; for keeping me grounded and not letting all of this overwhelm me. I love you, Tony. You have always been my touchstone and my constant. I know I will always be able to count on you to have my back. I have made my decision." Tony looked at her face, seeing peace and acceptance in her expression.

"And what decision is that?" He asked softly, gently pushing back the wisps of hair about her neck. Ziva leaned in to kiss him, her lips soft and pliable.

"I am here to stay, Tony. I am a new person, and I have a new life. I will welcome anyone who wishes to be a part of this new existence, and I will not blame myself for those who do not. I am happy, I am at peace." She laid her head on his shoulder, as Tony's smile widened in his own happiness:

 _Ziva was here to stay._

 **Well, I bet that was a real surprise, haha. Hope you enjoyed this installment. The cat is out of the bag. Will Ziva see the others? Tune in for the next chapter.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Thanks again for the lovely reviews. My apologies for the long delay. I have been in Florida and I had no internet access. Therefore you are getting a longer chapter than normal.**

 _ **Ziva looked down, the guilt of knowing that she had walked away almost consuming her. Tony immediately recognized his error, and lifted her chin. "I'm sorry, Ziva. I didn't mean that the way it came out. You did what you had to do and you accomplished far more than any of us could have imagined. You should be proud that you were strong and took a stand to do what was necessary to make a better you. You understand the difference right? I don't know if I'm explaining this right. I suck at this." Ziva looked up at that and leaned into his side.**_

" _ **No, you do not suck at this, Tony. You have been amazing. Thank you; for keeping me grounded and not letting all of this overwhelm me. I love you, Tony. You have always been my touchstone and my constant. I know I will always be able to count on you to have my back. I have made my decision." Tony looked at her face, seeing peace and acceptance in her expression.**_

" _ **And what decision is that?" He asked softly, gently pushing back the wisps of hair about her neck. Ziva leaned in to kiss him, her lips soft and pliable.**_

" _ **I am here to stay, Tony. I am a new person, and I have a new life. I will welcome anyone who wishes to be a part of this new existence, and I will not blame myself for those who do not. I am happy, I am at peace." She laid her head on his shoulder, as Tony's smile widened in his own happiness:**_

 _ **Ziva was here to stay.**_

"Lost and Found" – Chapter Thirteen

 **NCIS Headquarters- Navy Yard**

"I don't understand why you are so upset that Ziva is back, Bishop. You don't even know her!" McGee was getting frustrated with the grumping and pouting the Probie Agent was displaying after their return from the hospital. He expected the news of Ziva's return to possibly have some mixed results but he was thinking more of Abby, Ducky and Palmer. _What was this girl's problem, anyway?_

McGee chose his best course of action, which was to finally just ignore the sighs and deep forehead furrows. He couldn't help her with whatever her dilemma was at any rate. He returned his attention to his computer, running searches on the cell phone Tony had him ping a few days ago. To his amazement, Daniel Budd did not dump the phone, an act that was suspicious in itself. Of'course, McGee had no way of knowing at the moment that it was indeed Daniel Budd using the phone, but it _was_ in use…McGee frowned.

"This can't be right." McGee murmured to himself."

"You got that right." Bishop sniped. McGee glared at the young woman, in no mood to cater to her selfish suffering.

"Get down to IS and watch the security feeds. Whoever has this cell phone is close by. I mean…right on top of us." McGee could see that someone was using it this very moment and they were very close to the Navy Yard! McGee stared at his monitor, not sure he was seeing what he was seeing. He looked up when Bishop just stared at him.

"Go!" He yelled at her. Quickly, he grabbed his phone and called Vance.

 **Arlington, VA**

Tony glanced over at Ziva as he got on the beltway, easing his car into the constant rush hour that was I-495. Ziva had surprised him by stating she wanted to go back to the hospital to see Gibbs…and the others if they were still there. He was so proud of her not backing down in the face of adversity, of not _running away_.

Tony had texted Tim right as they left Gibbs' home, to let him know what the plan was in case he wanted to stick around and offer moral support. Tony hoped that Tim understood that he wanted him to stay, and Ziva really _needed_ him to be there. He wasn't bothered that he hadn't heard back from him just yet as those cell phones tended to not work too well in the hospital setting depending on what ginormous piece of equipment you happened to be near at the time and…

Tony's cell phone buzzing interrupted his thoughts and he glanced down, seeing it was from McGee. "Ziva, can you get that? They have a new law here in Maryland where you can't drive and use your cell at the same time. Of'course that doesn't really apply to law enforcement but…"

"I have got it, Tony." Ziva's lips twitched in amusement that Tony was concerned about obeying such a law. She swiped at his phone and clicked on the text. Her eyes opened wide as she read the short, terse message McGee had sent Tony in response to his earlier text. "Tony!"

Tony whipped his head to look at her, the tone of her voice urgent and distressed. "You need to turn around and go back to NCIS. McGee says he has a lead and you need to come in." Tony blew out his breath, calming his nerves. He had been waiting too long for such a call.

"God, please make this the real thing and not another false alarm." He prayed under his breath. Fortunately, they had just crossed the Woodrow Wilson Bridge, which spanned the Potomac River linking Virginia to Maryland. He quickly took the exit for I-295 and headed into DC, and the Navy Yard. It wasn't until he passed through the Guard's post and they asked about his passenger, only to smile wide and welcome "Agent David" back, did Tony realize that Ziva might not have wanted to come back to NCIS with him.

He looked at her apologetically, grimacing at how he was going to handle things if she was upset. But Ziva only shook her head and grabbed his hand. "It is fine, Tony. You need to be here. I do not mind. And I _will_ stay out of the way." Tony looked so woebegone at that, Ziva had to chuckle.

"I am not an Agent, Tony. I cannot assist." Ziva took a deep breath when she caught sight of the building she had called home for eight years. Tony squeezed her hand in reassurance.

"You gonna' be able to do this? Ducky will probably be there, not to mention all the other crap you're probably thinking about right now." Tony's jaw was tense. He truly had no idea what Ziva's reaction was going to be when she stepped off of that elevator into the bullpen, but he wanted to make sure she was prepared.

"I am fine, Tony." She ducked her head sheepishly. "I _will_ be fine, Tony. Yes, it will probably be difficult and I am sure I will be overwhelmed with memories." She stopped to stroke his cheek. "But not all memories will be bad, yes?" Tony's expression relaxed and he allowed himself a small smile.

"I remember some pretty awesome things, Ziva David!" Tony quickly got out of his car and slammed the door, waiting for Ziva to join him. Grabbing her hand, they took off at a fast trot toward the entrance to NCIS and Ziva's past.

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center- Bethesda**

Gibbs looked around the empty room, feeling lost and slightly abandoned. The team was all there, and then they all left…jabbering about Budd and The Calling and being condescending and patting him on the shoulder telling him not to worry about a thing.

"Shit!" The expletive even shocked Gibbs, ringing loudly in the small space. The familiar throaty chuckle from Mike Franks caused him to look up. He was never so happy to see his former mentor, which worried him somewhat. Had he degenerated into a delusion? Had the team really been there at all? Was he even awake?

Mike watched Gibbs as these new, frightening questions raced through his mind. He waited patiently for Gibbs to get a hold of himself. He had seen the signs before; they always manifested in some form. But he was a bit surprised to see Gibbs grapple with such uncertainty. Sighing softly, he decided he may as well be comfortable and took the lone chair by the bed, crossing his arms as he eyed the occupant.

Gibbs looked back at him, eyeing him warily. He had been disturbed to keep seeing Franks over the past weeks. He didn't really think he was losing his mind but he had a niggling sense he was losing his grip. He knew things weren't right with Luke Harris but he truly believed in the innocence of children. He saw what he wanted to see, not what was staring back at him. He shook his head at his own failure to see what was coming; a denouement that Franks had warned him about.

"Am I dead?" The question brought Franks out of his partial doze, causing him to lean forward.

"Are you having any pain, Probie?" Franks eyed the small bandage on the side of his head and the much larger bandages around his chest and left knee.

"Well, Hell… _yeah_ I'm in pain. What kind of stupid ass question is that?" Gibbs growled back, grimacing as he moved his leg. He looked down at his offending appendage, suddenly remembering that surgeon coming by and talking to him a mile a minute. What an asshole! Did he think he understood a word he was saying? _"Removed this and replaced that…"_ Gibbs looked quizzically at Franks.

"Did my knee really get replaced?" The shock in Gibbs' voice told Franks that he was finally remembering some things.

"You actually got that out of that pompous ass? I couldn't understand any of that medical mumbo-jumbo. But I do get this." Franks pointed to his knee. "That kid totally blew away your knee, Gibbs. I mean, shattered it to smithereens. I was there the whole time they operated, you know." His pained expression of the damage that had been inflicted on Gibbs' body was startling.

"They had two choices, Probie: replace your knee with one of those fancy titanium Six-Million Dollar Man doohickeys, or…"

"Or?" Gibbs was already feeling anxious about his injuries and Franks hadn't even mentioned his _chest_ yet.

Mike stood and walked over to the bedside, looking down at the man he had worked with for so many years. "I think I heard amputation being discussed." Franks thrust the emesis basin under Gibbs' chin just in time to catch the upheaval of his stomach. He had anticipated such a response. He had felt the same at the time and if he had been able, he would have thrown up all over the surgical covered shoes of the arrogant surgeon.

"Thanks." Gibbs murmured shakily as Mike took the basin to the bathroom. He looked again at his knee, grateful that he was not waking to a missing limb but still overwhelmed that it had been a possibility. "I saw Kelly." He blurted out. Franks nodded in agreement.

"Well, you did kind of die there for a bit. Went to the great beyond and all. Had a great show of looking at old photos, but why in the Hell that bastard Ari Haswari was someone you would want to see in the afterlife is beyond me. That sweet little girl of yours was ready to take you by the hand to you wherever you wanted to go, but they brought you back." Gibbs rubbed his forehead; sure he was dripping with perspiration. He was surprised to not only find it dry but to feel a bandage on the side of his head.

"Jeez, don't tell me the kid shot me in the head also!" Gibbs didn't know how much more betrayal he could take. He had befriended the young man, taken him into his home and shared special memories he had never spoken of to anyone else. Franks widened his eyes in surprise and looked again at the bandage.

"Naw, although he sure could have if he wanted to, the way you were just lying there and all. My guess is that he couldn't stomach seeing your brains blasted out all over the place." Franks nodded helpfully, giving the bandage a closer inspection.

"Gee Mike. I feel so much better now. Why in the hell is my head bandaged then?" Gibbs didn't want to think about what-ifs; he was only interested in _it-is_.

Mike shrugged. "DiNozzo told the Doc that when you fell back after being shot you hit your head on some rock or something, big bloody mess." He hit the back of his own head as his version of show and tell.

Gibbs nodded thoughtfully. He had no memory of hitting his head. In fact, the last thing he remembered was Luke saying his name. The rest was just flashes: pain, dust, DiNozzo hovering over him, bright lights…

"What about my chest?" Mike put his hands on his hips in exasperation.

"What am I, your surgeon? He was just in here explaining it all to you. I don't know what he said. You're alive; that's all I can tell you, Gibbs. Be grateful for that."

Gibbs was not appeased and clutched at the thin blanket as his anxiety rose. "How in the hell am I going to work like this? How can I lead a team when I can barely walk?" Franks cocked an eyebrow at the questions.

"Maybe you can't Probie, did you ever think of that? It might be time to hang up your badge." Gibbs scowled at that. _Not_ working had not even been on his radar; it had all been about _how_ he was going to work.

"That's not going to happen, Mike. Who will run the team? I need to be there!" Mike just shook his head, understanding the desire to be a valuable and needed member of the team; a feeling he had never personally felt himself…

"Who do you think is running it now? DiNozzo is in charge and it's about time don't you think? He can't be your second fiddle for the rest of his career or life, whichever ends first." Gibbs took a deep breath and considered the ramifications of Tony being in charge.

Gibbs had every confidence in his abilities as an investigator and as team leader, a confidence that was not always shared with his senior field agent. They had vastly different management styles and if Gibbs was being honest with himself, that was the sticking point over Tony taking over Gibbs' team.

Gibbs' had created and molded his team in the way he saw best; a team that was well-known and considered to be top-notch, usually. He grimaced somewhat at the changes the team had to make to fill Ziva's spot. It had been an impossible task, and Gibbs had been ordered to hire Bishop. He enjoyed molding agents into what he wanted them to be, and considered Bishop to eventually be a good choice, even if it had not been his to begin with.

Tony had a bit too much of a touchy feely type management style, making it almost a committee instead of a designated leader and a subordinate team, although if Gibbs was being fair, he wasn't actually present during the longest stint of Tony's term of leadership so that could be a limited impression. Gibbs often wondered if Tony had any real desire to be promoted and have his own team. He seemed too content to stay where he was and wait for Gibbs to leave the job to him. The problem with that scenario is Gibbs had no desire or plan to _ever_ leave. He scrubbed at his face, frustration mounting over his current disability and the welfare of his team.

Mike watched him, sympathetic to the inner turmoil he knew was percolating. "Do you want my advice, Probie?" Gibbs looked up, grateful at this point for any words of wisdom that Franks may have. Of all the agents he had ever worked with, Mike Franks was the one he considered to be the one whose opinion he sought the most. Tony may be the brightest young agent he had ever worked with, but Franks was _his_ mentor. He valued his skill in the field, in the interrogation room and his management style. He was gruff and he shot from the hip; but you could always count on him to give it to you straight; qualities Gibbs emulated within his own team.

"Of'course, Mike. I value your advice over everyone else, you know that." Gibbs shifted a bit in the bed, grimacing as pain shot through his chest.

"Take it easy there, Probie. And I don't mean just this minute as you tussle around in that bed. You can't do a damn thing right now, so just get over yourself and leave things to DiNozzo and the rest of that motley crew. The only thing you need to focus on right now is getting out of that bed and out of this germ infested place. After that, you can think about what you are going to do."

Gibbs slumped in the bed. Mike was right, of'course. He couldn't lead the team from his hospital bed for God's sake. He needed to heal and get back on his feet and into work. _Then_ he would deal with how he was going to run the team and keep them together. He felt a huge weight lifted from him and sleep began taking over. His last thought as he drifted off was he forgot to ask Mike about Ziva. He really needed to talk to Ziva…

 **NCIS Navy Yard**

Ziva sat at Tony's desk, slightly uncomfortable at the glaring eyes of the young woman who now occupied her chair. Tony had almost immediately taken the stairs to MTAC to meet with Vance. McGee had greeted her with open arms and the three had indulged briefly in the light banter that came so easily to them. Another, older woman then joined them and Ziva felt a wave of grief as she greeted Ned Dorneget's mother.

Tony had told Ziva of Dorneget's death shortly after her arrival and it had stunned and saddened her. When he told her that his mother, Joanna Teague was not only a CIA officer but that she was part of the investigation that led them to Iraq she felt a warning sense of déjà vu. She knew from experience that being personally involved in an investigation never ended well. But then, they _were_ all personally involved since it was Gibbs.

She offered her condolences and was not surprised at the strength she saw in this woman who was over twenty years her senior. She was all business and anxious to continue their efforts after their aborted attempt in Shanghai. But she was kind, and she surprised Ziva by telling her how much Ned had admired her abilities and her kindness toward him.

After reviewing some reports with Tony and McGee, Teague took off to contact her superiors. By this time, Bishop had returned from the basement and was staring at Ziva. Tony offered only a cursory introduction between the two women, after which he and McGee had left the two of them alone in the bullpen. Ziva was warm and friendly to the young blonde, but was taken aback by the frosty response. This Bishop person didn't even know her, yet she was acting like Ziva had done something to her. It did bother Ziva to think that some of the others may have shared their anger at Ziva leaving with this new person, and that she had formed an opinion of her based on the opinions of others.

Ziva believed that was a sign of weakness and a very undesirable trait for an unbiased investigator. But she didn't really know what the story was with this Eleanor Bishop person, so she studiously ignored her as much as possible.

"Why are you here?" The sudden outburst caused Ziva to look up in alarm. Bishop's face was haunted not angry and Ziva had a sudden understanding of the woman's demeanor.

"I am here to be with Tony and Gibbs. I am not here to take back my old job if that is your concern. I have no desire to do this work anymore." Ziva paused, not sure what if anything she should say to this stranger in her midst. "I made a very difficult decision; difficult for me and for others. To change my mind and come back would make no sense of my past." Ziva could see the stress leave the young woman and realized she had made a correct assumption. Bishop was worried that Ziva would want her old job back, and she would be fired.

Ziva felt a slight pity for the young woman. She knew what it was it was like to be the new person, but after two years on the team she thought that she would have a greater sense of job security. Ziva shrugged; she didn't really want to know how this new person was or wasn't working out. It was none of her business, unless Tony felt like sharing it with her.

However, Bishop felt no restraint in sharing her frustrations and soon Ziva found herself bombarded with questions and concerns and a detailed description of how this new job was affecting her marriage and far more information than Ziva ever wanted to know about anyone. Her eyes were wide and glassy by the time she heard the pounding of footsteps on the stairs. She was never more grateful for an interruption and stood up in anticipation as Tony, McGee and Vance joined them.

"Agent Da…" Vance smiled apologetically, inclining his head as he acknowledged his faux pas. "Old habits die hard, I'm afraid. _Ziva_ …would you care to join me upstairs in my office? You know, just to catch up." Vance smiled warmly but Ziva knew it was not an offer extended to be rejected. She owed Leon Vance; she understood that and accepted it. She also knew that time was of the essence and Leon Vance did not have the time to waste for benign gossiping and catching up. She gave Tony a quick look to make sure he didn't try to interject, but he was watching her closely. She gave him a small smile of encouragement and then joined Vance as he took the stairs to his office. Tony's eyes followed her every step until he could no longer see her on the mezzanine. He turned around to see McGee and Bishop watching him curiously.

"What? Ziva can handle Vance. Ok, this is what we got, Bishop. Daniel Budd or someone is using his cell on the metro. He's been riding all over the place, but we think he is going to get on the Green Line and head to the Navy Yard stop." Tony turned to McGee. "McGee is going to coordinate with Fornell and the FBI. The plan is to cordon off the area around the Navy Yard and close down the line once we think he has arrived. Metro will be shutting down the Green Line at his call." Tony paused as Teague rejoined them, excitement coming off of her in waves.

"Budd was seen on camera at L'Enfant Plaza, heading this way." She rushed out, checking her gun while she was talking. Tony blanched at the news.

"Shit! That's only two stops from us. Bishop, get back down to surveillance. I want all cameras and sensors monitored. There are too many abandoned buildings in the old Navy shipyard complex for him to hole up in. McGee, get on the phone to detention and make sure they are on their toes. I have a feeling he may try to bust out the kid." McGee looked up at that.

"That's insane, Tony. There's no way he can get Luke out of our detention facility." He argued. Tony responded by giving McGee a light head slap.

"What gave you the idea that Daniel Budd was sane, huh? Just do it McGee. And get to MTAC and coordinate with Fornell and his merry band of men…and women." He gave a smile to Teague who just rolled her eyes.

"What are you going to do?" Bishop blurted out. Tony eyed her speculatively, briefly wondering what if anything she and Ziva had talked about while he left them alone. He felt bad about that, for Ziva's sake. He didn't know or frankly care how Bishop felt about Ziva being in the room, but he did care about Ziva and didn't want her to be any more uncomfortable than she already probably was.

"Teague and I are going out to meet our guest." Tony punctuated his remark by slamming the magazine into his Glock. He looked at Joanna and nodded. Grabbing the earwigs, he shouted last minute instructions to his team as he and Teague headed for the stairs and an uncertain outcome.

 **Vance's Office**

Ziva looked around the office she had often visited, closing her eyes as she remembered one of her last visits to report that Bodnar was dead and "it was over". She looked at Vance to see him regarding her closely. He waved his hand toward a chair and she accepted the offer.

"I had heard that Director Elbaz had informed you of Gibbs' condition. I was curious to see if you would come back, to see him for yourself." He began.

"Director Vance, I want to apologize for not contacting you directly, to tell you personally that I was not intending to return. It was an unforgivable act on my part and for that I am sorry." Ziva began, twisting her hands together as she offered her words. Vance cocked his head.

"You had already tendered your resignation David, as did DiNozzo and McGee. You owed me nothing further. But I do have to say that I was disappointed that DiNozzo spent four months searching for you and came back empty handed." Vance nodded pointedly, making Ziva cringe a bit.

"It was not Tony's fault, it was mine. He did everything in his power to convince me to return…" Ziva thought back to their time in the orchard, when Tony had laid open his heart to her. She glanced up to see Vance smiling at her knowingly.

"Don't be concerned, David. I have no issues with DiNozzo. I was only disappointed that whatever methods he used on you, and I can only imagine what those were…" Ziva blushed slightly at that. "…didn't work."

Vance leaned back. "Now that you _are_ here, what are your plans?" Ziva stiffened at that, sensing that a pitch was about to be lobbed at her. Vance recognized the signs and held up his hand.

"Relax, Ziva. I know what you decided and why you decided it. I'm not about to pressure you to return to NCIS against your will." He smiled and winked his eye. "But I would lose all credibility as the Director of this Agency if I didn't at least broach the subject with you."

Ziva leaned back into the chair, understanding exactly what Vance was saying. There was a protocol to be followed: Director Vance would politely inquire if she was interested in coming back to NCIS; Ziva would in turn politely respond that she had no interest at this time. Vance would then offer that perhaps she would consider returning at some later point in time and Ziva would answer that she would consider it and thank him for thinking of her. It was all a game, one that Ziva was very familiar with. And Vance was quite correct: if the other agencies had heard of her return and he had extended no offer to her, they would either think he had lost his senses and therefore his edge; or they could possibly start badgering her for their own purposes.

Ziva was grateful for his foresight and business acumen and smiled her thanks. The sharp shrill of his phone interrupted their meeting and at once, Ziva knew that Budd had been spotted. She didn't know this person, she knew next to nothing about the investigation; but she knew in her core that he had been seen, if not found. She felt her pulse quickening and she silently chastised herself. She was _not_ part of the team anymore, and she would _not_ be involved she told herself sternly.

"Sorry David, we have some Intel on our case. If you'll excuse me, I need to get to MTAC. You can wait downstairs if you wish or you can remain here." Ziva quickly stood, not wanting to stick around the Director's office any longer than she needed to.

"I will go back to Tony's desk and wait if that is acceptable. Thank you Director Vance, for your kindness." Vance escorted her to the stairs and then quickly strode to MTAC. Ziva continued her descent alone and looked around the empty bullpen. She glanced at her old desk, and walked over to it. She hesitantly touched the surface with her fingertips, its coldness belying the life it had been witness to. A sudden wave of nostalgia threatened to overcome her and she quickly removed her hand. Looking at McGee's desk, she had visions of super glued keyboards, and costumes and a dear friend always offering a kind word of support, especially during the stressful time of her quest for citizenship.

She then looked at Gibbs' desk, her heart clenched at knowing he may not return to that chair. She shook her head at that; she knew Gibbs and he will be back even if it is on a stretcher she told herself. She chuckled softly at the image of Gibbs stretched out and barking orders and handing out head slaps.

"You _are_ here!" Ziva whirled around to see Abby standing by the stairs, her expression hard to read. Ziva stood still as the Goth approached her, her quick exit routes memorized long ago in different life.

Abby stopped in front of her and looked into her eyes, as if trying to read her soul. Ziva found the scrutiny uncomfortable and finally broke the silence. "Hello, Abby." Her voice was quiet and steady but inside she was far from comfortable. Abby was unpredictable and just when you think she's going to shower your with puppies and rainbows she rains down fire and brimstone.

Abby's mouth twisted into her little girl pout/frown. "How could you just leave like that? How could you not say goodbye?" Ziva's heart sank. She had really hoped that Abby would understand; she had told Tony at the airport that Abby would understand how she was feeling and would be ok with the way things ended up. It would seem she was wrong.

"I…I am sorry Abby. I was not in a good place and I did not want to bring any one else down with me, you understand? It was hard enough that Tony had to hear my dark thoughts and concerns. I thought I was doing a good thing by not saying anything. I did not mean to hurt you. Please forgive me." Ziva held her breath, her emotions shaken by this revelation. Thinking those thoughts and verbalizing them are two different things and speaking of it now brought back that troubled time for her.

Abby regarded her closely and then shocked Ziva by throwing her arms around her. "I have missed you so much! And I was _so_ angry at you for leaving like that and poor Tony! He was such a mess when he came back without you! How could you do that to him? Although now that you say what a bad time it was for you I guess I understand how difficult it was for you to make the decision to stay and not come back. But we needed you and you weren't here. But in retrospect I guess if you came back before you were ready you would have been miserable and then we would have been miserable and that would have been really bad." Ziva shook her head at Abby's flight of ideas. She was instantly reminded of her return from Israel and by extension her capture in Somalia. Abby had alternately berated and accepted her actions, just as she was doing now.

Ziva understood this was Abby's way of dealing with something she didn't like and let her vent. She knew from experience that she wouldn't be able to get a word in edgewise in any case until she had finished having her say and was done talking.

Finally, Abby quit talking and was taking deep breaths. Ziva nodded in relief and went to sit at Tony's desk, looking up as Abby glanced around the empty room. "Where is everyone?"

"Exactly where, I do not know Abby. But I was with Director Vance when he got a call saying something was happening. That is why I came back down here." Abby looked excited and eager.

"You were talking with Vance?" She bounced up and down, clapping her hands like a little girl. Ziva watched her pigtails swing in tandem. Before Ziva could disabuse her of any notion that she was considering a return to the orange room, Bishop rushed out of the elevator.

"I can't watch down there, it's too claustrophobic!" She looked around in alarm, worried that someone may have heard her voice her unknown phobia. She barely glanced at Ziva and Abby as she quickly typed some codes on her keyboard and the large plasma came to life.

Both Ziva and Abby stood and watched transfixed as the grainy night of the Navy shipping yard came to life. "I wish we had infrared capabilities up here." Bishop complained.

"Maybe that's why you were sent down stairs." Abby offered. Ziva was glad she had said that, even if she was thinking it herself. She was in no position to offer criticism or opinions but she agreed that having infrared would be advantageous, which they had down stairs. "So what are we looking at here other than the old part of the Navy Yard?" Abby asked.

"Tony and Officer Teague think that Budd is going to try to get here from the metro. There are a lot of old abandoned buildings he can hide in." Bishops was looking over the screen, trying to orient herself. Ziva frowned and started to speak, but refrained from asking questions.

She was finding it so easy to fall into her old rhythm and role and she was somewhat disquieted by it. Fortunately, Abby felt no need to hold her tongue and seemed to be thinking along the same lines. "What are Tony and Teague doing? They aren't out there by themselves are they?" She turned to Ziva in alarm, and for the first time Ziva felt concern for Tony's safety outside the usual threat to bodily harm that came with the job. This man was responsible for Gibbs being in the hospital after all.

"Do you think he is coming after Luke?" Abby asked Bishop, who was trying to change the angles of the multiple cameras with the remote control. She nodded as she struggled with the device.

"Tony thought he might try something. McGee has put the guards on alert in case he actually gets that far."

"Who's Luke?" Ziva blurted out the question before she could control her tongue. Fortunately, neither woman thought her input was out of place or inappropriate. Abby turned a pained expression toward her.

"Luke Harris. Budd brainwashed him into joining The Calling, along with thousands of other young kids. He's the one who shot Gibbs." Ziva gasped, not truly understanding what they were up against until now.

"Gibbs was shot by a child?" Ziva was horrified, knowing how Gibbs felt about kids. If he knew, he would feel so betrayed even if he didn't know the kid. Abby nodded sadly.

"Yes! And Gibbs went out of his way to try to help him, and get him away from this horrible group!" Abby had tears in her eyes, telling Ziva that this was indeed a tragedy on multiple levels.

Ziva had far too much experience with terrorists who recruited children and young teenagers, making them believe in a mandate that would most likely lead to their early deaths. She knew from experience that you could not be deceived by their ages; that they were as capable of terror and carnage as any hardened adult. And she knew experience that you could not trust your instincts and rely on your own belief system when dealing with these disenfranchised youth.

She recalled an early case, when she had just joined the team when a young man had taken his classroom hostage. Her experience kept advising Tony to take him out, that he was a terrorist and capable of inflicting great harm. Tony and Gibbs had overruled her, complaining that she had a different world view and that the United States was not the Middle East. And she had never been happier to be proven wrong. However, it was now clear that the Middle East had indeed come to the United States and Gibbs had either not gotten the memo or had refused to read it.

 **Old Navy Shipbuilding Yard**

"Why do these things always happen at night?" Tony gingerly stepped over some rusty metal left over from a long ago era. Teague wrinkled her nose.

"I thought they were cleaning this place up?" She stopped and peered at something on the ground, shuddered in disgust, and continued to move forward.

"Tony, do you read me?" McGee's voice crackled through his headset. Tony held up a hand to stop Teague.

"Read you loud and clear, McGee. Tell me you have something." Tony's head whipped around, taking in his surroundings.

"Just to your left, an old abandoned ship building warehouse. We're detecting a heat signature inside." Tony looked at Teague and made motions with his hand toward the building. She nodded in understanding and started in that direction.

"Anything to say it's Budd? Not really wanting to scare the shit out of some homeless person, McGee." Tony whispered as he carefully made his way toward the rundown building.

McGee rolled his eyes. "No, DiNozzo. When names start showing up with infrared I'll let you know. In the meantime all we have is a live body, or maybe a dead one that hasn't been dead that long." Tony stopped at that, but then continued.

"Thanks McGee, you're a bundle of laughs. We may need reinforcements out here…"

"They are already on their way, DiNozzo." Vance broke in. Tony winced; glad he hadn't said anything too flippant. He realized if Vance was in MTAC with McGee that Ziva was on her own. He worried briefly about that and then dismissed the thought. He needed to focus on the task at hand.

Moving as stealthily as they could, they reached the edge of the building. Tony sensed movement above him and stood back. "Someone's on the roof." He whispered. Together, he and Teague advanced into the building, clearing each section as they entered. "These don't look very safe." Tony eyed the rickety stair but Teague was already climbing. Sighing deeply, he waited until she had reached to the next level before he tested the stair with his weight. He had a few tense moments, but made up it unscathed.

"Someone is standing on the edge!" Teague's tense voice reached his ears he before he got to her side. Tony peered into the darkness and was shocked to see young Elan Ghorbani standing on the edge of the precipice. The young man who had lured Luke Harris from Gibbs' home was now standing less than ten feet from him, but on the other side was an abyss of darkness.

"Elan, you need to step back from the edge. No one is going to hurt you." Tony called out, as Teague moved closer around the corner. "McGee, we need a tactical team up here, now."

"He's not going to jump, or accidently fall." Teague cut in smoothly. "He's here to keep us occupied while Budd does whatever it is he came to do, isn't that right Ghorbani? So what is he doing? Planning to blow up the Navy Yard? Or perhaps he is going to plant some of those Bouncing Bettys at Nationals Park, hmm? That would be spectacular, taking out all of those innocent people as they enjoyed America's favorite pastime." Tony winced at Teague's baiting and was relieved to hear the pounding footsteps of reinforcements behind him.

The young man could sense that he would soon be overwhelmed by large adults with even larger guns and willing allowed him to be manhandled off of the ledge. "Where is he?" Tony hissed at the boy, who just stood smirking at them. "Lock him up!" Tony barked, tired of these kids with attitudes. "Talk to me, McGee! We got the kid; now tell me you see someone else around here besides us!"

"Tony, we're getting heat signatures in two more buildings, both behind you." Tony and Teague both turned their heads around to look in the direction Tim had indicated.

"On our way. You…" Tony directed the team of Marines closest to him. "With us." Tony left the roof before anyone could respond. Tony was pissed at the ruse. Just like Budd had done in Iraq by calling Tony on his cell phone. _DAMN IT!_

He pulled out his phone while slowly making his way toward to the two buildings. Not surprisingly, Budd answered. "Agent DiNozzo, we speak again. How nice. I wouldlove to stay and chat with you but I am very busy at the moment. I'm sure you understand."

"The only thing I understand is that you are going down, along with your network. You're on our turf, Budd. You won't get past us this time. This is just a game for you, but it's a game you won't win." Tony's voice was deep and grim, angered at the pompous Budd.

"Ah, in that you are wrong, Agent DiNozzo. The game's just begun." Budd hung up the phone and watched the countdown on his laptop.

Tony snapped his phone shut. "What did he say?" Teague asked, glancing anxiously at the Tony.

"The game has just beg-…" Tony's words were cut off as the building directly in front of them exploded in a huge ball of flame. The force of the explosion threw Tony backward off of his feet. As he flew through the air, he wondered how he was going to explain to Vance that Budd had taken down another member of the team.

 **Yikes! What a terrible place to leave off, oh so sorry… By the way, there has been no spoiler regarding Gibbs' leg being amputated. I made that up. I also made up Bishop's claustrophobia. I have no idea if she suffers from that or not. So…Abby and Ziva finally meet up. I know a lot of people don't like Abby, but I can't have everyone be horrible to Ziva. But most will have their personal issues. This chapter has a lot of action in it and I think that is how the premiere will be. SPOILER ALERT: SKIP IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW…**

 **A promo came out that didn't make a whole lot of sense to me, and also an interview which negated what was said regarding the fast forward.**

 **The first half of the show will focus on Gibbs getting help, almost dying, seeing Kelly etc. He will come out of surgery and then they will focus on Tony and Teague going after Budd in Shanghai. Not clear if they catch him or Luke or not. I think the explosion and the countdown and everything else with Budd probably happens in Shanghai. The end of the episode will have Gibbs on crutches or a cane, maybe even in a wheelchair and coming back to the bullpen, probably to tremendous applause. I can see the final "phoof" being Gibbs sitting at his desk and looking around with an expression of** _ **"what in the hell do I do now?"**_ **Just guessing that on my part.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Thanks again for your amazing support and response to this story. I really appreciate the time you take out of your day to read my TIVA words.**

 _ **He pulled out his phone while slowly making his way toward to the two buildings. Not surprisingly, Budd answered. "Agent DiNozzo, we speak again. How nice. I would love to stay and chat with you but I am very busy at the moment. I'm sure you understand."**_

" _ **The only thing I understand is that you are going down, along with your network. You're on our turf, Budd. You won't get past us this time. This is just a game for you, but it's a game you won't win." Tony's voice was deep and grim, angered at the pompous Budd.**_

" _ **Ah, in that you are wrong, Agent DiNozzo. The game's just begun." Budd hung up the phone and watched the countdown on his laptop.**_

 _ **Tony snapped his phone shut. "What did he say?" Teague asked, glancing anxiously at the Tony.**_

" _ **The game has just beg-…" Tony's words were cut off as the building directly in front of them exploded in a huge ball of flame. The force of the explosion threw Tony backward off of his feet. As he flew through the air, he wondered how he was going to explain to Vance that Budd had taken down another member of the team.**_

Usual Disclaimers: Disclaimed

"Lost and Found"- Chapter Fourteen

 **NCIS-MTAC**

McGee listened intently as Tony relayed what had transpired on the roof of the dilapidated building. "Tony, we're getting heat signatures in two more buildings, both behind you." McGee was getting excited and anxious at the same time. They finally got another one of those kids responsible for Gibbs' condition and Budd was within reach. At last, an end seemed to be in sight but McGee had a niggling sense of dread. It had been too easy: Budd and Ghorbani just waltzing in to be easily taken. Budd was a master manipulator and McGee looked warily at Vance as he considered the possible scenarios.

The sudden, bright explosion on the huge screen confirmed his fears. Budd had no intention of being taken without a fight, and planned to take as many with him as possible. "Tony! Report your position! Tony! Respond! Are you ok?" McGee felt sick to his stomach as he listened to the static on the other end. Vance began barking orders to Fornell to secure the area around the explosion and ordered Military personnel to surround the other building and that they were not to let Budd escape.

 **NCIS- Bullpen**

The three women stood transfixed in front of the large plasma. "I wish I knew what was going on." Abby broke the tense silence. "Don't they have on headsets to communicate with each other?" Bishop looked up at that.

"Yes, Tony and Teague both have headsets. I saw him grab it as they ran out of here." Abby looked excited.

"Why didn't you say something? I can monitor their transmissions. Let's go!" Ziva looked hesitant. She wasn't cleared to view any part of this exercise and didn't want to get Tony in trouble or cause any one to question her participation that could harm their investigation. Abby solved her dilemma by grabbing her hand and dragging Ziva along with them to the elevator. Once in the lab, Abby quickly got the images up on the plasma and then typed in the necessary commands to access the live feed from the transmissions.

"… _signatures in two more buildings, both behind you."_ McGee's voice suddenly filled the space, making the women jump slightly. Ziva's shoulders tensed, acutely aware of the danger Tony and Joanna were in. Her understanding of the minds of these terrorists had served her well in the past but only made her anxious now that she could not act on her instincts. She had every confidence in Tony's abilities as an investigator but experience didn't always win out. The abilities of Teague were an unknown to her, and she reminded herself that vengeance usually caused common sense and training to be tossed aside to meet one's personal agenda. The multiple heat signatures, as she understood that was what McGee was referring to, worried her. There was no way to know how many had actually come to the Navy yard complex.

She gripped the stainless steel counter as her eyes bored through the monitor in front of her and was grateful three seconds later she had thought to ground herself. The flash that consumed the plasma brought gasps of shock from the three women. Ziva was instantly assaulted by memories that she had long thought to have been exorcised: the blast at the Tel Aviv shopping complex that had taken the life of her only sister; sitting in a car with Tony and McGee with her mouth covered by Tony's hand as the ship they were surveilling exploded with Gibbs inside; watching in horror as the car they believed Tony to be driving blew up as the team observed in MTAC; entering a room that had been rigged to explode to find her father missing; being in an elevator with Tony as an explosion rocked NCIS…far too many haunting memories for one person so young to bear.

Ziva tightened her grip on the table as she watched in horror, knowing Tony was probably near the inferno and his fate was once again uncertain. She had to physically and mentally fight the urge to take off and go find him, to be assured that he was ok, and to find the ones responsible for once again inflicting harm on those she loved.

She shook her head to clear her senses, and watched as Abby punched in cell phone numbers and physically restrained Bishop from doing what she had just been thinking. "Bishop! Stay put! You can't just run out there, what are you thinking? Until you are ordered to assist you stay put!" Ziva had never heard Abby so assertive and agreed with her assessment. Although she felt fully capable, she had serious doubts this young woman had the skills to act appropriately in such an arena as an active bombing/terrorist situation. She could see that she was more of the analyst computer whiz that McGee was when she first met him. And although Tim had grown and established himself as a capable field agent, Ziva had no intuition that Ellie Bishop would follow in his footsteps. In fact, she felt she would be probably more of a hindrance than a help at this point.

Ziva fought to control her emotions as she watched Abby do what she could not and reminded herself that it had been her choice to step aside and let others do the work she could no longer allow to be a part of her life. It came to her in a flash that by being back in Tony's life she would be exposed by association. She fought to quell the negative thoughts that kept intruding and focused on the here and now. And she hoped and prayed that the one person she focused on the most still had a life for her to be a part of.

 **Old Navy Shipbuilding Yard**

The acrid smell of the flaming building finally brought Tony back to the world of consciousness. He struggled to open his eyes, the smoke burning and irritating. Coughing roughly, he groaned as he slowly tried to get up onto his side and assess his injuries.

He had no doubt he had a concussion because he had lost consciousness and Tony wondered briefly how many concussions one person could withstand before their brains started oozing out of their ears. Speaking of ears, the incessant ringing almost rendered him deaf, so much so that he couldn't hear the repeated orders to report his condition and position.

He hissed as he moved his arm and squinted in the darkness as he surveyed the damage to his left bicep. A large gash was bleeding profusely and he realized he needed to do something about that but he couldn't remember what. Maybe Teague could help him…

His sudden reminder of Teague brought him back to the present. Budd was close by and Tony was not going to let him get away! He struggled to his knees, clamping his right hand over the ragged cut to stem the flow. "Don't let Budd escape." He yelled to anyone within earshot. "Surround all the other buildings, but don't enter. There could be another bomb. Repeat! DO NOT ENTER!" Tony felt a hand on his back and whirled around, dropping his right arm to grab his gun. Slapping at his waist, he remembered he had been holding it when the explosion took place and it was now not on his person.

"Agent DiNozzo, its Fornell! Are you alright?" Tobias Fornell was in full tactical gear and surrounded by young and eager agents. Tony looked at him in surprise, and then recalled that the FBI was assisting. He needed to get his game back on he realized and not succumb to the pain and shock.

"I lost my gun. Where is Teague?" Tony rounded on the older man, hopeful that Budd had been stopped. Fornell looked over his shoulder.

"Teague is being assisted. You need to be attended to DiNozzo, we got this."

"NO!" Tony yelled at him. "I am not leaving until Budd is either captured or dead, you got that? Now get me a gun or get the hell away from me!" Tony started looking at the ground around him, certain his weapon would be nearby. Vance's voice finally came through to him on his headset as he was barking orders to the armed Marines who were surrounding the other building.

"Gas him out, repeat: gas him out. We want this bastard alive. I don't want any showboating. Am I understood?" Tony closed his eyes in relief. A glint from his flashlight revealed the missing weapon had been flung about twenty feet from Tony's original position.

"Damn it DiNozzo, you're going to bleed to death. Let us at least tie this up." Fornell had kept by his side as Tony searched for his gun. Tony looked at him in surprise and then looked back down at his hand that was dripping with the unimpeded flow of his blood. He fought back the nausea and lightheadedness that threaten to overtake him. Fornell yelled out to a young Marine who immediately came to his side with a kit. He opened it up and expertly applied a field bandage to Tony's upper arm.

"You're going to need that attended to, Sir." The medic informed him after doing what he could do at the moment to stop the bleeding. Tony looked at his handiwork, thinking this was probably what it was like during a military op, taking care of the wounded in a hostile setting. He turned to the young man to offer his thanks but he had already returned to his ranks, ready for the next orders.

Tony and Fornell made their way toward the circle of Marines as they readied their weapons. "Budd! You're surrounded! You are ordered to surrender. If you do not surrender, we will use tear gas and you will be captured and possibly killed." Tony yelled out into the dark building in front of him, his adrenaline keeping him upright. He could see Teague out of the corner of his eye, but he couldn't see how badly she had been injured. She was still on the ground and being attended to and he remembered she had been closer to the blast than he had. He fervently hoped that Dorneget was not going to be seeing his mother anytime soon.

After several tense minutes of silence, Tony turned to the unit commander and nodded. "On my mark!" The Captain yelled into his headset. Tony covered his already assaulted ears as the weapons fired, launching the tear gas canisters into the building in front of them. Tony stepped back and gratefully took a mask from another marine, tightening the strap to ensure a snug fit.

A sudden explosion from the burning building sent flaming debris onto the presumed hiding place of Daniel Budd and soon the edifice was also engulfed in flames, fed by the tear gas. Everyone stepped back as the heat intensified and Tony looked grim. He wanted Budd alive; he wanted Budd to be charged and to stand trial and incarcerated for his crimes. He would take him in a body bag but he would get no satisfaction from it.

Movement from the entrance caught everyone's attention, as Budd staggered out, gasping for air and clearly burned. The Marines all surrounded him, pointing their weapons at his head. Tony stepped forward and kicked his legs out from under him, the injured Brit falling heavily to the ground.

"Daniel Budd, you are under arrest on the charge of Terrorism on American soil and for the attempted murder of Federal Agents. You have no rights under the Patriot Act. Do you understand?" Tony didn't wait for a response as he roughly cuffed the wrists of the blond man who had inflicted so much pain on the team. He stepped back as the marines jerked Budd to his feet and marched him toward the Navy Yard for booking. Fornell turned to his agents.

"Secure the area! We need to make sure there are no more of Budd's accomplices in the area. This is not over! The Calling is still at large. There are still targets that need to be secured." The sirens in the distance told them that the DC Fire Department had been alerted to the Navy Yard inferno and to assist the Military brigade. He turned to Tony as the eager agents took off at a trot. "I'll bet you were just chomping at the bit to do your Tommy Lee Jones impression."

Tony looked shocked that Fornell would even know about that, but shrugged his shoulders in easy agreement, until his injury reminded him that such movements might not be a good thing to do at the moment.

"Yeah, well that was for one man. And as you pointed out, we still have an entire organization to locate and bring down. At least Budd won't be doing any more recruiting." Tony added as he checked out his arm.

"Let's just hope that Budd didn't already pass that job onto someone else." Fornell quipped.

Tony rolled his eyes. "You are just a bundle of laughs, Fornell; you know that? No wonder you and Gibbs get along so well." He dryly responded.

"Speaking of bastards, how is Jethro doing?" Fornell asked as he helped Tony gather his gear and head back to NCIS.

Tony watched in silence as Teague was rushed by on a stretcher and he started to sag. "Awake, but I didn't get a chance to see him before I was called back to welcome Budd to the U.S." Fornell nodded in understanding.

"Well, if I know Jethro he'll be back in no time. He never could sit on the sidelines." Tony considered those words as they reached the perimeter of the Navy Yard and followed the Marines to the detention center. Gibbs _would_ probably try to take charge whether he was cleared to work or not. Tony didn't want to think how he was going to handle his boss just at that moment; he wanted to get Budd processed and then get back to headquarters…and to Ziva.

 **NCIS, Abby's lab**

Ziva had finally taken a chair after McGee had called down to find Bishop and give her orders. She took off and that left Abby and Ziva alone to witness whatever they could see, which was maddening when they really didn't know what was going on. As they watched, the second building caught fire and they looked at each other in alarm. "He's not going to let them take him alive, is he Ziva?" Abby asked quietly.

Ziva sighed, not really sure she could answer in any way that would appease the woman. "I do not know this Budd, so I cannot attest to his mind set or agenda, other than to inflict harm. If he is Jihadist, he will most likely seek martyrdom rather than be captured alive." Abby continued to watch the screen for several minutes, trying to discern what was happening less than five blocks from their location. Ziva's words finally reached her brain and she turned to her in surprise.

"Oh, didn't you know? Budd is from England and as far as we can tell, this is his personal thing. I don't think it has anything to do with Religion, I think it has to do with Politics." Ziva frowned, unsettled by this news. "Look! They got him! Yay!" Abby was pointing at the screen, and bouncing up and down in excitement. Ziva got to her feet and walked over to where Abby was standing. She could see the Marines closely guarding a man in handcuffs as they marched him toward his new destiny. As they passed by a surveillance camera, Budd looked up and stared straight into the lens, allowing Ziva to see his face. She gasped as her hand flew to her mouth in shock. Abby grabbed her arm. "Are you ok? What is it? Do you know him?"

 **NCIS Detention Center**

Tony signed the last form and fell into a chair as McGee came rushing in. "Tony, are you ok? Where is Teague?" Tim looked around for the CIA officer, frowning when he couldn't find her.

Tony pointed to his arm. "I got winged by some debris blasted out of the building. God knows what it was. Teague is injured and has been taken to Walter Reed. I don't know what her status is." Tim listened closely as Tony described what had happened. He then looked at his arm, grimacing at the blood soaked bandage.

"You need to go thereyourself, Tony. That looks really bad." McGee wasn't surprised to see Tony shaking his head no.

"I need to give Vance a SitRep and write up my report. I don't want anything to go wrong with this conviction, McGee." He winced as he moved his arm in his desire to make his point. Tim put his hand on his good shoulder.

"OK, Tony. Let's take care of business and then you let Ziva take you to the hospital. You don't want to get an infection. Or you can let Ducky look at that. Actually, I think that's a better idea. He can at least clean it out and give you a new bandage."

"Exactly where is Ziva?" Tony was sure she was ok, but sitting around while everyone one else was fighting a terrorist might have hit a bit too close to home for her. McGee gave him a wide grin and a thumb's up.

"She's with Abby. I knew it would be ok. You two were worried about nothing." Tony didn't know if he should heave a sigh of relief or worry that Tim was imagining things and there was actual carnage in the downstairs forensics lab. Remembering McGee had also brought up Ducky's name made him consider his options at bit more carefully. McGee didn't know the medical examiner was the person who had turned Ziva away, so Tony knew there was no intent regarding his suggestion. Tony thought about it for a few moments and as tired and weak as he was, he decided that maybe it was time to have that chat while he had the chance.

"Ok, that sounds like a plan, McGee. Help me up, will you?" McGee reached down and helped Tony to his feet. He swayed slightly and Tim grabbed at him.

"I don't know Tony, maybe we should just take you to the ER now. You don't look too good." Tim noticed the pallor in his face and wondered how much blood he had lost. Tony waved him off.

"I'll be fine, just get me to Ducky." McGee felt he had no other options so he slung Tony's good arm around his shoulders and helped him walk to the main building, going as slow as possible to prevent jarring the injured arm.

"Ducky!" McGee called out when they finally entered the morgue through the MCRT vehicle entrance.

Palmer looked up in shock as the two made their way through the automatic doors. "Oh my God, what happened? Are you alright?" Tony eyed Palmer sarcastically.

"I'm just peachy, Palmer. McGee however, has a tummy ache. What in the hell does it look like?" He barked at the young assistant.

"Good Lord! Mr. Palmer if you please, over to this table." Ducky had entered the room as soon as he heard the exchange. "Yes, that's it, easy does it. No, lay down, Tony. I can get a good look just as well with you lying down as sitting upright." Ducky unwound the bandage and peered at the wound. "Mr. Palmer: some saline irrigation, a Toomey syringe and a basin. Hurry! When was your last tetanus shot?" He was cutting away the sleeve of Tony's shirt as he shouted out his orders.

"Why would I need a tetanus shot?" Palmer paused as he was gathering the supplies Ducky had ordered.

"Not you, our patient!" Ducky replied in exasperation. Palmer looked embarrassed and mouthed a silent, apologetic _"oh"_ as he hurriedly brought over the requested items.

"Ok, Tony. This might sting a bit." Tony gritted his teeth and hissed as the saline solution entered the open wound in his arm. He closed his eyes and thought about Ziva to keep his mind off of whatever Ducky was doing to him at the moment. He was beginning to regret his decision to come to Ducky as he remembered that since he worked with the deceased he wouldn't have any pain killers around. The poking and prodding was getting intense and he bit his lip to keep from yelling out and scaring everyone.

"That's all I can do for now I'm afraid, but I strongly recommend that you get to the hospital soon. You need care that is out of my purview unfortunately." Ducky did take a quick x-ray to see if the bone had been penetrated but he couldn't get a clear picture, which was concerning to him.

"Sure thing Dr. Mallard, as soon as I report to Director Vance." Tony slowly opened his eyes and saw the doctor looking down at him, his face compassionate and full of concern; an antithesis to his actions toward Ziva. "McGee, Palmer: could you excuse us for a moment? I need to talk to Dr. Mallard privately. McGee, help me up before you go." Palmer and McGee looked at each other in surprise and McGee reached to help Tony sit upright.

"I don't think you should sit up just yet, Tony." Tony ignored Ducky's admonishment and held his breath as another wave of dizziness washed over him. He started to doubt his desire to get this over with while he was in this condition, but his need overruled his common sense at the moment. Once the two other men left the room, Tony cleared his throat and stared at Ducky.

"What is it my boy? Are you concerned about something? I do think you need medical attention but I don't think this is very serious if…"

"Yes, Dr. Mallard. There is something I am concerned about." Tony's tone of voice brought Ducky up short. He could see he was struggling to contain his composure and in a sudden moment of clarity he thought he understood Tony's concerns. Ducky kindly put his hand on Tony's good shoulder.

"I know it is a shock for you, Tony. It was a shock for all of us I'm afraid. I am most happy to talk to you about it but I do think you should have your arm attended to first. Once you are feeling better I will be happy to help you get through this. Do not let this be a setback for you. We are all here for you, you know." Tony was lost for a moment until he realized that Ducky thought he was upset to hear that Ziva had come back. He couldn't believe the doctor's obtuseness. He took a few moments to gather his thoughts before he spoke. He knew no matter what happened, he would still need to work with the medical examiner. His personal feelings would have no place in the work setting and Tony realized he would need to be the bigger person here. But he had no qualms in setting the record straight.

"Dr. Mallard, I assure you that not only am I aware that Ziva is back but I have known for days. She has been staying with me." Ducky looked shocked at that and confused.

"Why would you allow her to stay with you? I don't understand how…"

"That's the problem, doctor. You don't understand. You never did! I know Ziva called last year, and I know she spoke to you. And because of your words, she did not come back last year as she planned. Do you know why she wanted to come back? She decided to come back because she loved me and wanted to be with me. She couldn't return when I wanted her to, but she was ready in April. I was waiting for her, for her to come back home and to come back to me." Tony started coughing, the smoke he had inhaled irritated his scarred lungs, much to his dismay.

Ducky had gone silent at Tony's tirade, shocked by his words. _Ziva loved Tony?_ He found that hard to believe but Tony believed it so he had to accept his words. "But Gibbs wouldn't allow that, Tony. You know that, it would never work…"

"That wasn't your decision to make, don't you get that? Ziva didn't want to come back to NCIS to work so I don't give a shit what Gibbs would have wanted or allowed. It's not up to Gibbs and it sure as hell isn't up to you. I love Ziva and we could have been together a year ago if you hadn't decided to give your personal opinion on what was best for me. You have no idea what is best for me. Only Ziva and I can make these decisions regarding our lives and I want you to stay out of it." Tony coughed again and decided to shut up for the moment as he struggled to catch his breath.

Ducky was shocked by Tony's admission and edict, but his medical condition overrode his personal feelings on the matter. "Mr. Palmer, the portable oxygen tank. Agent DiNozzo is in distress!" As Tony heard the pounding footsteps of Jimmy Palmer and felt the mask deliver blessed oxygen to his anguished lungs, he noted that he had indeed been under distress but once again, Ducky had gotten it wrong.

 **Surprised by the quick resolution to Budd? Don't be because I don't like doing procedurals. This is a TIVA story and things needed to move along so our dynamic duo can move forward. Is it over? Nope, and I won't be continuing too much past what will probably happen in the first three episodes of Season Thirteen as this is about what happened to Gibbs and how Ziva returned, not a story of the rest of their lives. It is not clear from the spoilers (did you forget this is all about my interpretation of spoilers?) whether Budd gets caught in the premiere or not, but it doesn't sound like he is going to be a recurring menace like the others and this season is about the how his actions affect everyone.**


	15. Chapter 15

**Thanks again for the amazing response to this story. This chapter wraps up the premiere since there is no way I will get another chapter in before Tuesday. Lots of new footage and spoilers coming out, some of which contradicts what was said earlier regarding the time frame of this episode. This chapter will be shorter than the others as well as I want to get this out.**

 **Mixed reactions on the Tony/Ducky show down. Since Tony still needs to work closely with Ducky, I thought it would be counterproductive for Tony to give him too much verbal abuse and make their future work relationship impossible. As I wrote in the chapter, Ducky still doesn't quite understand.**

 _ **Ducky had gone silent at Tony's tirade, shocked by his words. Ziva loved Tony? He found that hard to believe but Tony believed it so he had to accept his words. "But Gibbs wouldn't allow that, Tony. You know that, it would never work…"**_

" _ **That wasn't your decision to make, don't you get that? Ziva didn't want to come back to NCIS to work so I don't give a shit what Gibbs would have wanted or allowed. It's not up to Gibbs and it sure as hell isn't up to you. I love Ziva and we could have been together a year ago if you hadn't decided to give your personal opinion on what was best for me. You have no idea what is best for me. Only Ziva and I can make these decisions regarding our lives and I want you to stay out of it." Tony coughed again and decided to shut up for the moment as he struggled to catch his breath.**_

 _ **Ducky was shocked by Tony's admission and edict, but his medical condition overrode his personal feelings on the matter. "Mr. Palmer, the portable oxygen tank. Agent DiNozzo is in distress!" As Tony heard the pounding footsteps of Jimmy Palmer and felt the mask deliver blessed oxygen to his anguished lungs, he noted that he had indeed been under distress but once again, Ducky had gotten it wrong.**_

"Lost and Found"- Chapter Fifteen

 **NCIS- Vance's office**

Ziva sat quietly in Director Vance's office, absorbing the shock of recognizing Daniel Budd. She had done everything in her power to remove herself from the ugliness of the world but it kept finding her. She did not like being on the "other side of the table", even if she was not being interrogated as a suspect. Giving a witness interview to provide information was just a step below that from her perspective and she had a sudden appreciation for all those men and women she had taken statements from.

"Thank you, Ziva for letting us speak to you. I know you didn't expect this, and I can appreciate how uncomfortable you must be. But I would also appreciate anything you can tell us about Daniel Budd." Director Vance began, and Ziva was both surprised and relieved by his consideration for her discomfort.

"Thank you, Director. It is…I was shocked when I saw his face and realized I had seen him before. I cannot say I _know_ him...I never spent any time with him and I am not sure I ever said more than "good morning" or "hello" to him." Ziva twisted her hands as she haltingly began her story. Vance nodded thoughtfully, giving her time to gather her thoughts.

"The first time I saw him, I think, was in June of last year at one of the refugee camps just outside of Netivot. He was travelling with a group who called themselves "Children of the World". As I was only the cook, I did not have any contact with these people except at meal times, and then it was minimal. I do remember that they were there to place orphaned children into suitable homes, hopefully for adoption. I believe Budd was with the group that focused on teenagers, but I may be mistaken." Ziva paused and took a drink of the water McGee had thoughtfully provided her.

He was busy with his laptop, trying to find any information on the Children of the World group. "Here it is: "Children of the World- _And the Children Shall Inherit the Earth_ "." McGee read from their website. He frowned. "It also has in its by-line _"Helping Children Make a difference and Change the World"._ That sounds innocent and ominous at the same time."

Vance looked grim. "Well, Budd made sure that motto was lived up to, didn't he? What else have you got, McGee?"

McGee quickly scanned through the website. "It looks like they have teams for different areas. Here is the Middle East team." McGee put the image up on the plasma as both Vance and Ziva rose from their seats to get a better look. Ziva pointed out Budd. "Yes, that is him. Even if he does have a beard here, I recognize his eyes and nose." Ziva looked at the others and pointed out a few. "These men and women were always together when they came. After Netivot, I spent a short time in Re'im; I saw them there as well."

Vance looked sharply at Ziva. "Do you remember if they took any children with them?" Ziva frowned and began pacing as she racked her brain trying to remember an event eight months earlier.

She looked again at the screen, recalling each face in the large communal room. "Yes, I believe they took ten or fifteen boys and girls when they left. They were all in their early teens by their looks. I am sorry I do not have more detail. I had only been in that camp for a few days when they showed up and had not learned the children yet." Ziva felt she was letting them down, but Vance looked excited.

"You have given us very valuable information, Ziva and I thank you for helping. See this man right here?" Vance was pointing at a photo of a young man. "That is Sadiq Samar. He is already in custody. You may have just led us to the entire leadership of The Calling."

Ziva looked at McGee in shock. All the time these people had been within her sphere she had no idea there was anything to suspect in their mission. Perhaps if she had actually sat down and gotten to know any of them she would have picked up on _something_ …Ziva stopped that train of thought as soon as it entered her mind. It was not her job any longer to do that kind of work and to blame herself for not stopping the carnage sooner would serve no useful purpose. Just as she knew that Tony shouldn't blame himself for Gibbs being shot, which she knew he would no matter what she or anyone else told him; she also knew that she had no responsibility as well. That she had not seen through the lies of this group and reported them was not a failure on her part and she finally began to relax.

As she watched McGee and Vance bring up the other members of Budd's team, she finally felt she had come full circle, her past and her present colliding to ensure the future she wanted for herself…and she hoped, for Tony.

 **NCIS- Bullpen**

Tony looked worriedly up toward the mezzanine, wishing he was present during Ziva's interview. The oxygen had revived him to the point that he was able to leave autopsy and head back to his desk to finish his paperwork. His stomach dropped when Abby had told him what had happened in her lab. He was worried that Ziva would be upset that she was once again at the center of evil and wanted to be by her side to help her through any distress she was going through.

However, now that he had finally dictated his report to Bishop since he couldn't type very well with one hand, the adrenaline was dissipating and he was feeling nauseous and weak. He glanced at his arm, wondering just how bad his injury really was. Since everyone was so busy, Palmer had been delegated to finally take him to the hospital to get the medical attention Ducky couldn't provide.

"Tony! I'm sorry I took so long. Are you ready to go? You look terrible." Palmer had rushed out of the elevator and was talking and manhandling Tony to his feet at the same time.

"Can you believe Ziva is back? Well, I guess you can believe it since you've seen her. Good thing I guess that you decided it was "DiNoz _Zoe_ ". Palmer chortled at his own joke on Tony's name but only received a stare in return from Tony. "Sorry, I meant that since Ziva was here…well, you know." Palmer finally trailed off when he realized that Tony was not in the mood to discuss Ziva with him.

"Just get me to the hospital, Palmer. The sooner I get this taken care of the sooner I can get back." Tony gritted his teeth as another wave of nausea hit him. Palmer nodded and held onto his good arm to keep him upright.

"So, why is Dr. Mallard so upset? Did you say something to him?" The words were asked conversationally but Tony could tell the Palmer was either worried or upset. He didn't really care at the moment whether or not Palmer knew about his conversation with the doctor, or how he felt about it.

"Ask him about it Palmer. I'm not exactly in a sharing mood at the moment." Tony kept his tone even but the reminder of his earlier words to Ducky brought a bitter taste in his mouth. He would have loved to say something more strongly worded, but he was mindful that right now with Gibbs out of the picture he needed things to be on an even keel. If that meant he had to swallow his anger to maintain a good working relationship he would do it. But he didn't have to like it and he didn't.

He sighed as he thought about the weeks, maybe months to come while Gibbs was out of commission. Regardless of how he felt about his current circumstances, he needed to keep the team going until some other solution was derived; either Gibbs returning to the Team Leader position or maybe someone else taking over the helm. Tony had mixed feelings about the position, but he knew only time would tell before he made a decision one way or the other. _One day at a time_ , he told himself.

Tony was shocked to see the first rays of daylight as they exited the building. What seemed to take only seconds had lasted hours. His fatigue finally won out and he was grateful that Palmer had thought to bring his car to the curb ahead of time.

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center SICU- Bethesda**

"You're kidding, right?" Gibbs glared at the cocky doctor standing at his bedside. Dr. Cyril Taft looked affronted at Gibbs incredulous outburst, crossing his arms in front of him as he prepared to read the riot act to his recalcitrant patient.

"I assure you, Agent Gibbs that I am not. Although I am quite well known for my dry sense of humor and use it often to great effect; I am perfectly serious. You are getting out of bed today, _now_." Dr. Taft paused to pick up his chart. "Under normal circumstances, you would have been up and walking a day after your knee replacement surgery. Unfortunately, the circumstances weren't normal and your chest injury has delayed your rehabilitation. Having a fragmented bullet rip your insides to shreds will do that." Gibb wince at the doctor's brutally honest assessment of his injury.

"Is this another example of your famous sense of humor? Because I have to tell you Doc, you suck." Gibbs responded dryly, his dislike of doctors and all things medical ratcheted up several notches. Too his surprise, Taft laughed at his remark.

"Yes and yes: sometimes I do suck. But because of my brilliant surgical techniques I am tolerated and have certain privileges that are not afforded to others. Look Agent Gibbs, I really don't give a rat's ass if you like me or not, but you are going to walk out of this hospital." Gibbs eyed the doctor, daring him to a staring contest. Taft was game and they both finally called it a draw.

"Ok, Doc; I'm all yours." Taft looked appalled.

"Oh, I won't be getting you out of bed. The nurses or somebody else do that kind of work." His disdain for work he considered below his station was evident, and Gibbs did not question it. He had his own world view that was very close to Dr. Taft's. It surprised him that maybe they weren't as different as things appeared on the surface.

As on cue, two physical therapists entered the room, looking far too cheerful for Gibbs' comfort, but he gave into the inevitable.

"Fine." He groaned. "Do your worst to me."

 **Walter Reed National Military Medical Center ER**

Tony took in deep breaths as the ER doctor continued to probe at his upper arm. They had given him an axillary block and he felt no pain or _any sensation_ for that matter, but he knew what they were doing and it bothered him immensely.

After sending him to MRI, they found a fragment was still in his arm, close to the bone. Fortunately, the bone wasn't injured in any way, but they still had to perform minor surgery in the Emergency room to remove the fragment and thoroughly clean out the wound. The fragment in question turned out to be a very long and sharp wooden shard. The threat of infection was very high, so they used an antibiotic solution as the irrigant and he was presently attached to an IV dispensing a very high dose of Ciprofloxacin. They had also determined that he had a very hard head, which Tony could have told them without all the medical tests. No fracture, no bleeds, no swelling; just another concussion to add to the account.

"That's it, all done." The doctor finished the final suture and snapped off his sterile gloves. The tech came over and began applying a large dressing. Tony tried to flex his arm to test the bandage, but forgot about the block. His arm was dead weight at the moment. The tech chuckled at his attempt and waved a sling in front of him.

"You'll need to wear this for at least until all sensation returns to your arm. You don't want to mess up something else because you can't feel what you're doing. Is there someone who will be with you?" Tony opened his mouth to respond but the tech kept on talking. "Despite all these drugs we are giving you, there is still a chance of infection. You'll want to keep an eye on the drainage and check your temperature every four hours."

"I get to leave?" Tony finally managed to get a word in edgewise. The tech looked surprised.

"You have to be practically dead before we admit you, sorry to be so blunt but that's how it is." The tech shrugged; clearly not apologetic in the least. "Is there someone here for you?" Tony thought about that.

"Someone is supposed to come, but I don't know if she got here yet." Tony had been told by Bishop that she would tell Ziva where he was and give her his car keys so she could meet up with him at the hospital. "Can you give me my phone? I can send her a text." The tech rummaged through his belongings and handed over the phone. Tony held it in one hand and stared at it, perplexed how he was going to manage this.

"Here, give it to me." The tech held up the phone so Tony could type up a very simple text. Less than ten seconds after he hit "send" he got a response:

" _In the waiting room."_ Tony sagged in relief. "She's here, in the waiting room. Her name is Ziva. You can't miss her; she'll be the most beautiful woman you've ever seen." Tony smiled wide, his sincerity eliciting an arched eyebrow from the ER Tech.

"Ok, I'll go find the most beautiful woman in the world." He left the room and Tony stared at the walls, thinking about the evening's events. They actually got Budd! He had to keep wrapping his mind around that. He suddenly chastised himself, realizing he hadn't asked about Joanna yet. She had clearly been more seriously injured than he had been, but he had no idea of how bad it really was. He hoped she would be ok; too many had died at the hands of this man.

That reminded him of Gibbs. He wondered briefly if he and Ziva should stop by and see him before they leave. He wasn't sure if he was physically up to it but it would also depend on how Ziva was coping after the surprising revelations. A soft knock on the door brought him out of his musings.

"Come on in." He called out, hoping it was Ziva and not Palmer. The soft brown eyes that greeted him swelled his heart. The brief time they had been apart tonight had felt like years and he was slightly panicked that he wouldn't see her again. He knew he would need to rid himself of this fear of letting her out of his sight.

"Are you ok?" Ziva looked tired and very worried, but Tony was glad to see that she didn't look upset or angry or any of the other negative adjectives he worried about. She came to his side and peered closely at his arm. "I saw the explosion on the plasma in Abby's lab. I thought…I was so worried, Tony." Her voice caught with her emotion and Tony gently took her hand with his good one.

"I'm fine, just got hit by some debris blown away by the explosion." Tony murmured softly, caressing her hand. He had forgotten what it was like to have someone be worried about him and he found that the sensation was one he wanted to get used to.

"You are not brain injured?" Ziva asked, obviously not buying that he only had the one injury. Tony gave her a mock look of insult, but understood her disbelief. He would have asked the same question if he didn't already know the answer.

"Well, not a _serious_ one. Got knocked out, came to; have a concussion but nothing serious, I promise." Ziva looked closely at him to make sure he was not making light of his injury but finally relaxed when she saw the honesty in his face.

"Are they admitting you?" She asked, looking around the room as if that would answer the question. Tony shook his head.

"Nope, they're kicking me out. So I'm all yours once I get the discharge papers." He paused for a moment, sizing up her current state of exhaustion. "Since we're here, we can stop by and check on Gibbs. That is, if you're up to it." Ziva looked surprised at the suggestion.

"You are not too tired? Tony, you have been up all night and just had a lot of medical things done to you. I do not want you to overdo it." Ziva frowned slightly. She did think it might be a good idea to see Gibbs since they were at the hospital, but her concern for Tony overrode any desire she may have.

"I think I'll be ok for a quick visit. We can play it by ear. Hey, he could be asleep." Tony hoped Ziva would agree. He felt a need to tell Gibbs they got Budd, assuming no one else had already shared the news. Ziva gave him a long look and finally sighed.

"Ok, we will go see him on the way out. But the minute you look like you are going to keel over that is it." Tony grinned at take-charge Ziva. He had missed her feisty attitude and it made his heart light.

A half an hour later, Tony was seated in a wheelchair much to his embarrassment with his left arm in a sling. Ziva chuckled at his grousing but reminded him that if he fell over or something while they were still here they would never let him leave. That stopped his complaints for the moment. He still wished he could maneuver the chair himself but with only one good arm he had to rely on Ziva to get him mobile and in a generally forward direction.

By the time they arrived at the ICU, Tony had enough. "I am not rolling into Gibbs' room, Ziva. It's bad enough that I'm going to have to explain this sling." Tony looked miserably at his still numb and useless arm. Ziva patted his chest in comfort.

"Do you think Gibbs is going to lecture you? Do not be silly, Tony. Come on, I will help you. Did they give you any pain medicine? You must tell me if you feel faint." Tony was starting to rethink the whole "having someone take care of you" scenario. Ziva was practically hovering over him; which was nice but so incongruous to the Ziva David he knew.

"Gibbs!" Ziva open her eyes wide in shock as they entered the room. There was Leroy Jethro Gibbs, sitting up in a chair looking ready to murder someone. "You are out of bed! So soon?"

Gibbs had looked up when Ziva spoke and his anger vanished when he saw his missing agent. "Ziver…" he croaked out. Ziva rushed over to him and gave him a light hug, careful to not disrupt any medical equipment that was attached to him. Tony was left standing to his own devices, which he didn't mind too much. He raked his eyes over Gibbs, trying to look at everything.

"Looking good, Boss." He offered cheerfully. Gibbs eyed his Senior Field Agent, his eyes wandering down to his left arm.

"Aw, Hell Tony. What did you do this time?" Gibbs growled.

Tony decided he would not be put off by his demeanor and attributed it to cabin fever. "Just a scratch. Got blown up, you know the usual. Oh, yeah, we got Daniel Budd." Gibbs' face had been getting darker with anger as Tony glibly talked about his wounds but at Budd's name his eyes lit up.

"What? Where?"

"Navy Yard, decided to blow us up or get Luke or hell, I have no idea what he was thinking. But he didn't get very far." He paused and lowered his voice. "Joanna Teague was injured in the blast as well but I don't have a report on her yet." Gibbs leaned back in his chair at that, disturbed by this news.

"Wait, what do you mean he was coming to get Luke? Where is Luke?" Gibbs' stared hard at Tony. He had told him to protect the boy, to make sure he was ok. Was he in a safe place or did they screw that up too?

"Luke Harris is under armed guard in our lock up. Looking at a lot of time for attempted murder of a Federal Agent." Tony replied grimly. He remember their exchange as Gibbs lay bleeding to death in the sandy marketplace. Gibbs wanted to argue with Tony, but he just didn't have the strength or will at the moment.

"We'll discuss this later, DiNozzo."

Tony shrugged his good shoulder. "I would expect no less. You look good; don't harass the nurses too much. Ziva, are you ready?" Ziva looked over at Tony in surprise. She could sense the tension in the room; a tension she didn't like or understand but it was not her place to get involved in their case. She nodded and gave Gibbs a quick kiss on his cheek.

"We will talk later, yes?" With that, Ziva took Tony's arm and led him out of the room. "You are tired, Tony. Let me take you home, you will feel much better then." Tony was getting into the wheelchair, but stopped at her words.

" _Home?"_ His voice was almost a whisper, as if he was afraid he had misheard her words. Ziva smiled softly, understanding his question. She placed her hands on his face and slowly laid her forehead against his.

"I am fighting for you Tony. I will always fight for you."

 **NCIS Bullpen- Two Months Later**

Everyone stood around in the bullpen, waiting for the guest of honor to arrive. It had been a long, hard recovery but Gibbs has finally been cleared to return to work. No one was sure what he would be doing, and there had been anxious discussion among the team how they were going to handle things. Much to his surprise, Jimmy Palmer found himself to be the go to guy for bouncing things off of. Tony had continued as Team Leader while Gibbs was in rehab, but he wasn't sure he enjoyed it. He often found himself almost mimicking Gibbs, doling out head slaps and giving snarky remarks.

Tim had taken him aside and asked him to stop with the Probie this and Probie that, as well as no more head slaps please. Tony had been shocked that he had channeled Gibbs so closely. It was so second nature that he didn't even _realize_ he was doing it and made an effort to control things.

Despite the uncertainty on the work front, life at home was more than he could ask for. After Budd was captured and they went home, there was never any more discussion of Ziva finding someplace else to live. She did help Gibbs a lot at home, but she always was there at night for Tony. His twin bed quickly expanded to a queen, and now they were seriously considering looking for a larger place to live. _"Maybe you can't have two full cups." Tony mused to himself. "But if I have to choose, I know which cup I will take."_

The information Ziva had been able to provide had resulted in the complete dismantling of The Calling. Vance had lobbied hard to get Ziva to return to the fold, but she had demurred. Tony stood by her the entire time, letting her fight her own battles but being there to offer love and support when it was needed, especially when the rest of the alphabet soup started bidding for her services. She finally told everyone she was pregnant and they started to leave her alone. Tony had almost fainted when she told him what she had done, but after she had reassured him that she had made it up to get rid of everyone, the color returned to his cheeks.

"Do not worry, Tony. When it really happens you will be the first to know. Well, maybe the second." She gave him a quick kiss and sauntered into the bedroom. Tony dropped his jaw but quickly got his wits about him and rushed after her. A torrid night of love making had them both thinking that maybe they should start making some plans.

The ding of the elevator brought everyone to attention. Slowly, but on his own accord, Leroy Jethro Gibbs entered the bullpen that had been an integral part of his adult life. He had always felt he would be lost without it, but as he gazed around at the familiar faces and equally familiar orange walls, he didn't feel relief. He felt empty. It was no longer home to him.

The clapping started on the mezzanine as Director Vance looked down on his agents, so reminiscent of when they had returned after rescuing Ziva that Tony felt his eyes water. So much had happen between the two events. Things were nothing like they used to be, and Tony understood that they never would be the same. Maybe it _was_ time for Anthony D. DiNozzo to map out the rest of his life, to find out what he really wanted and make it happen instead of waiting for it to happen.

As Gibbs sat at his desk and received the well-wishes of the people of NCIS, Tony held back and silently slipped away. He pulled out his cell phone and punched in the numbers committed to memory.

"He is there?" Ziva throaty voice sent waves of warmth through him.

"Yes, he's here, sitting at his desk. I don't know how late I'm going to be…"

"It is fine, Tony. I understand all too well, remember?" Ziva chuckled. She still hadn't decided what she wanted to do yet, but that was fine with Tony. She didn't have to do anything if she didn't want to, as long as she was happy.

They both paused, their deep breaths calming and centering. Each knew that change was in the air, change that could alter their life paths. But as frightening as the unknown was, they knew that they had someone who would always be there, who would always have their back.

"I know. I was just calling to tell you I love you. And I'll be home as soon as I can." Tony leaned against the wall, smiling as he pictured her soft curls and even softer skin.

Ziva closed her eyes as unexpected emotion threaten to overwhelm her. She didn't know what she had done to deserve this happiness, but she was done questioning the motives of others and whether or not she was worthy. She finally found what she had been looking for: what had been lost was now found, and she was never leaving again.

"I love you too, Tony. Always."

 _ **Hope you liked it. Doubt I will write more, especially since GG has made it clear in his interviews that there is absolutely no chance Ziva David will return this year. Thanks for reading and supporting the story. Not sure if I will actually watch the premiere or not.**_


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